like rip van winkle, awakened after years and years, the foolishness glares. waking up and seeing the fool in the mirror is terrible
2007-12-15 06:04:44 · 13 answers · asked by JIM 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Senior Citizens
Making amends should NOT have as its goal winning forgiveness. That in itself is a selfish goal and not one that has the 'victim' of your deeds in mind.
The act of making the amends is to 'fess up to your deeds and to sincerely apologize.
SHOULD you then receive forgiveness...so be it.
Acknowledgement of your deeds and apology is what counts.
Glad you woke up :-)
2007-12-15 06:29:49 · answer #1 · answered by sage seeker 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
I actually GOT the long awaited 'I'm sorry'... from TWO husbands.... both alcoholics who finally straightened up and realized that what we had could have been a whole lot better..... one said he didn't realize what he had back then... the other just said he fouled up big time and that was plenty for me.... I no longer get my BP over the limit when I hear their names.... and it's nice to know.... so I'd say do it.... tell the ex that you see the light and that you're apologising for the time when you were a fool..... that's all you gotta say.... write it, call or say it face to face if you dare.... but if it's sincere, you might just get a little forgiven.... just a little.... and that will be enuff...................
2007-12-15 13:22:50 · answer #2 · answered by meanolmaw 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Send a Christmas card and leave it at that.
Ancient history and water under the bridge blah blah blah.
Either you'll get a card back or you won't but ex is ex so you don't really care much either way.
It's just Christmas making you feel like all the axes need to be buried.
2007-12-15 07:43:41 · answer #3 · answered by Debi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sage seeker nailed it.
It's not for you to dump your guilt and get something for it. It is merely you being responsible for your own behavior and acknowledging it, expecting NOTHING in return.
So many go the appology route expecting "oh baby,,,,that's ok....I knew you didn't mean it." Expect a brick and be thankful if they silently shut the door in your face and anything more a blessing.
2007-12-15 06:47:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I lived for years hoping for some word from my ex telling me that he finally 'got it'. It never came. When he died, I found myself angry with him because now I will never hear the words.
Write a letter. Say what is in your heart. Wish her happiness in her present life and then move on with yours.
2007-12-15 09:21:07 · answer #5 · answered by Just Hazel 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
A letter by snail mail. Just plainly state what an a** you realize you were and ask for forgiveness. Maybe you'll get it and maybe you won't but at least you owned up to your stupidity.
2007-12-15 06:10:50 · answer #6 · answered by Southern Comfort 6 · 8⤊ 0⤋
Share the mirror.
2007-12-15 06:53:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
the simple answer is you cannot. just accept you were an idiot and try not to make the same mistake/s or act the same way. time has a way of putting things right when its time, if this makes sense
2007-12-15 06:18:15 · answer #8 · answered by Phillip J 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I can only suggest that you could be years too late, forgive yourself and let sleeping dogs lie. She/he might not want to hear it now.
2007-12-15 08:06:35 · answer #9 · answered by ncgirl 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Feeling lonely are we? As they say amongst the wise hard Cheddar.
2007-12-15 08:15:20 · answer #10 · answered by inthedark 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋