I know I deserve to be loved. I know I'm a good enough person. And people tell me they love me, they show it. I have no reason to doubt it. Why is that I still go to bed every night thinking that tomorrow could be the day they say "I was kidding about that." or "I changed my mind." Is this natural?
2007-12-15 05:13:21 · 13 answers · asked by The Babe is Armed! 6 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
OMG you are so much like me its scarry. I was just thinking the same thing. I think it has to do with our past. The only unconditional love I ever felt was from my grandparents. I knew they would love me no matter what I ever did. I never tested that theory because with them, I was secure enough to know that I was accepted.
Why do we torture ourselves with our insecurities? You have a woman waiting to marry you because she loves YOU. I am still hoping to find that in a man someday. One with whom I can be myself with. One who knows my heart. One who knows that I am sincere about what I say and do and NO ONE will be able to convince him that I am not true.
We tend to be harder on ourselves than others are. We see the imperfections that others may, if given the opportunity, find endearing. We just need to concentrate on accepting who we are and praying that the ONE who can appreciate us, will find us. Or me, I should say. You already found your ONE.
2007-12-15 06:52:30 · answer #1 · answered by The Evolution of T. 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'll add to the above comments by asking yourself to add to the list of the people who give you love and positive comments, one more. And that person is YOU. You know you can start positive self talk instead of intellectualizing yourself down the path of doubt and self-annihilation like you have shown in your introduction here. Cognitive behavioural therapy would be good in this regard. That is what it is renowned for.
Of course I'm being pointed to give you a little kick in the pants. Just to let you know I care. It just doesn't matter if this happens to so many millions of others! Do you like it or not? Change It!!!
2007-12-15 05:51:02 · answer #2 · answered by Blue Hues 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Natural or not, it's far too common. You're not unusual in your fear, it's a paranoia many experience. And most of the time, it's just that - paranoia.
Self-doubt can have many origins - most of them rooted in a childhood filled with criticism or insufficient praise, even perhaps excessive bullying from one's peers. It's made worse if you're in any sense significantly "different" from your peers, or if you have any kind of displacement in your childhood (i.e., adoption, foster care, runaway, etc...).
Chances are very good that it's just paranoia, you seem to realize this. If it's seriously bothering you, then you might want to seek counselling - even just of a very low-level sort.
You might also want to consider preparing yourself emotionally for the worst - sometimes I find that's the best remedy. It's not likely to ever come to pass, but if you can prepare yourself inside to think, "Okay, so what if that _does_ happen? It might crush me for awhile, but I will survive and learn to live without it." I find that even for the most absurd fears, developing the attitude that you don't care if they're true or not goes a LONG way towards getting over them. That's hard to do with a fear like this one, but can be useful if you can do it.
Good luck.
2007-12-15 05:28:15 · answer #3 · answered by uncleclover 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
All my life I’ve never really been able to trust anyone. I’m not really sure why, but I’ll do my damnedest to try and explain it. I’ve been let down by few people, that when someone makes a promise I just don’t believe them. Promises just don seem to mean much to some people, I could name names but I don’t wanna make the people I’m referring to look like a******. Then there are some people that come threw on their promises. Those are the ones that know what I think of promises and make sure to fulfill them just to make me smile. So to the friends who’ve kept their promises…. I just wanna say thanx alot
2007-12-15 05:43:27 · answer #4 · answered by .:::Niko:::. 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
it isn't NOT natural but i wouldn't say that it is natural either. some people are just very insecure, or care too much about what people think. get over it. this sounds corny but think about the good things about yourself. and if one person pretends to like you then it is one person. not everyone is pretending to like you. there is bound to be at least 2/3 people who say that they like you and do.
2007-12-15 05:25:32 · answer #5 · answered by Alegria B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you will have to change your mind.
you will have to tell yourself that you are attractive every morning and day when you start feeling insecure.
I suggest you get the book or DVD called THE SECRET.
you have an idea of what i am talking about you can go to Youtube.com and type the secret and you will see a short movie of it that will give you an idea of what i am talking about and what you need and it will change your life completly.
2007-12-15 05:29:40 · answer #6 · answered by frenchi 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
no one is familiar with regardless of god(s)/(ess)(es) are doing up there. so its human nature to attempt to "snug up" to whomever they think of is in can charge. in line with threat Gods are busy, or are finding out people, punishing, or are sitting lower back for a snort. in line with threat this extremely is hell and praying is a subcocious form of repenting. it incredibly is all approximately interpretation, veiw component, and needs.i for my section think of it incredibly is the folk worshipping that have subconcious lack of self assurance. As for God's being extremely, they exist or dont, doesnt extremely matter selection. fairly of dwelling good for an more suitable afterlife, i perfer to stay good as a results of fact i decide directly to for the folk around me. i'm hoping that enables you out :)
2016-10-11 08:34:42 · answer #7 · answered by ragoonanan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you had that happen in the pass, so now you think that...just say, someone did that to me, now i think when someone tells me that they love me..i don't believe them..i think there joking..you are a kind person, of course they love you...
love you too
2007-12-15 06:35:42 · answer #8 · answered by ilovemessages 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are such a babe, Babe!! Having Alice as a friend, is it natural to make such thoughts??? Nooo, it is not. Now, go to bed and sleep like a happy, lucky and much loved babe! Mmmmmuah!! :)
2007-12-15 08:29:32 · answer #9 · answered by Alice in Wonderbra 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Babe, you have to change your mind and trust yourself. If you dont trust yourself you can lose your confidence. That is a big mistake. Please love yourself first. Believe me they are going to love you more.
2007-12-15 07:53:13 · answer #10 · answered by mujde 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋