Is it normal to be this afraid of labor?

Question

I'm only 2 months pregnant, with my first kid, and I'm TERRIFIED of childbirth!!! I already know I can't have an epidural because of drug allergies I have. I'm so scared of how bad it's going to hurt. I've seen Discovery Channel shows of women screaming and stuff, and they had epidurals!!! All everyone keeps saying is "it won't last that long, and it will be worth it when you get to hold your baby." But that's not really helping. I can't even begin to imagine how bad it's going to hurt. I'm also afraid of having to get a c-section if something goes wrong. I'm basically just a mess right now!!! Please help!!!

A lady told me that her childbirth hurt as much as when she got tattooed. I have 9 tattoos, but I think I have a low tolerance for pain, so I think either this lady is wonder woman, or was just trying to make me feel better. And please, serious answers only.

Answer 1

Well at least you're being realistic about the pain side of labour and childbirth. It does hurt like hell and it is a bit scary. The thing is though, once labour starts you just kind of go into birth mode and it doesn't seem to be such a big deal. Your body takes over and your mind just goes with it. Its hard to describe but all the apprehensiveness seems to go away once labour starts. Its instinctive.

I was very apprehensive with my first, totally freaked out with my second (because I knew what to expect to a degree) and yet both times I was ready to do it all over again right away. Once its over youre like, well that wasn't so bad! And I didn't have epidurals either. I figure its only one day or less out of my whole life!
I'm pregnant again and sure I'm nervous about it but hey, you kinda don't have much choice but to do it now!

Try and keep your chin up, relax and trust your body to do its thing once labour starts and trust me, by the time you get to 40weeks you'll actually be wishing for it to happen!

Best of luck and remember that the midwives and support people are there to help you through it. You won't be alone!

Answer 2

It is normal to be scared of the labor process; I was as well with my first. However, you should calm down because being so stressed out over such a natural and beautiful process will actually cause more pain and make the labor process last longer. You should also know that every labor is different.

Have you talked to your doctor about other medications besides and epidural because there are so many options available today. I had an epidural with my first 2 and some other type of medication with my 3rd, but I have forgot the name of it.

Also, don't believe what you see on TV because it is dramatized. As I stated earlier, I have had 2 epidurals and did not scream like they do on TV, they do that for the ratings. I actually laugh at the women on the TV shows that show women having babies and the way that they are acting.

Answer 3

Yes, its normal to be a bit panicky about the thought of giving birth. Talk to your doctor as soon as you can, about your drug allergies and what your options are for pain relief during delivery, there's still the option of gas and air I would think. Its better for you and your baby if you have this discussion now, rather than stress-out over what "may" happen.

The Discovery chnl isn't going to show a really quiet birthing, is it? It wouldn't make for good tv. However, some women scream to help release the energy required to push, so its not all to do with the amount of pain.

Go and have a proper chat with your doctor and don't leave the room until you are satisfied that you have all the answers you were looking for. Go back again if you forgot something.

From now on, you need to concentrate on growing your baby. You have started something that you can't avoid but finish. Once you realise that you can't back out of this situation, you may start to relax and let your body get on with the job.

Even someone without your drug allergies would feel like this early on. Its perfectly normal. Good luck.

Answer 4

Yes it hurts but you will make it. Most of my labor was in my back so as long as someone was rubbing my back I was ok. I didn't have an epidural with mine. Because I wanted to have the experience PLUS I was more afraid of the epidural than the pain from labor.

You need to remember everybody is different what is painful for the women on Discovery may not be so painful to you. Talk to your doctor about what you are feeling and stop watching the Discovery Channel dealing with labor for now.

Remember in the old days women didn't go to the hospital. And still today some women have their babies at home by midwives why I don't know but they do.

You will do find!!!!

Answer 5

I understand what you mean. I was absolutely terrified when I got pregnant the first time. From day one all I could think about was how bad it was going to hurt, and when I actually went into labor it was ten times worse. But I think I had hyped it up so much at that point that by the time it actually happened, I was overly prepared. It happened so fast, and yes it hurt, but the pushing part was actually a relief and as soon as she was born it was like the pain completely stopped. I'm not saying that it's this magic thing and you'll have a perfect birth, but it is all worth it. People aren't just saying that.

Answer 6

I was the same way with my first baby. I cried a lot and worried about everything. Once your in the last few weeks you will be excited to go into labor. At the end it's not easy to rest and I had to go to the bathroom what felt like every few minutes even during the night. I was so ready to have my baby that I can't even tell you what the pitocin or epidural was like and I had both. I don't remember feeling drunk I just know that I was having bad cramps and once the epidural kicked in I could watch the contractions on the monitor with my husband and know that it was almost time. Now looking back all I remember was seeing my baby the first time and thinking..WOW! She is beautiful! Try to enjoy being pregnant...ask other moms what was their favorite part of being pregnant.

Answer 7

Yes it is! The doctors and nurses will help you-that is what they are there for..let them help you when the time comes and worry about HOW they will make you more comfortable......think about it.....every human you see had a mom that went through it...if it was real bad, word would have gotten out a long time ago...no more people! Relax-don't think about that part of it, it really is just a short time, you will be taken care of and treated well!!! Just stay healthy for now and-remember it is NATURE-it will be o.k. How bout some natural childbirth classes, so you can learn to relax through it? I had six kids-scared every darn time....1st one, 22 hours of hard labor, 5 more and all worth it-it is true!

Answer 8

your like me sweetie, i was sent to a counsillor because i was soooo scared! Now? i cant bloody wait lol, giving birth is an amazing experience. You cant expect to have something amazing for such as low price.. you have to go through pain. I'll be honest, it IS GOING TO HURT YOU. But, if you prepare yourself you'll be fine! That's what ive done, and now im feeling great about it, In fact if i could do a practise run now I WOULD :)
I read books on it, i know LOADS about giving birth and labour and stuff, positions and everything, i watch programs on it. Im well educated on it-because i want to go into labor with my eyes open. My sister is 15, and gave birth without screaming-if she can do it, i can!! If you take each pain as it comes then youll be alright, but if you go into labor like this youll be ten times worse than you should because your so nervous. Read about pain relief etc, what positions you can go in, and prepare yourself. Thats all you can do, im sure at one point you where also scared of pergnancy-scared of losing that baby inside you. Well birth is the chance for you to stop that worrying- to finally hold your little world all in your own arms. Take that chance, make the most of it, and dont be scared. Youll look back and think it was all worth it!
Good luck sweetie xxx

Answer 9

I am a really big Chicken when it comes to pain.I have had a son and a daughter and currently 29 weeks pregnant.I was terrified too just like you.I didnt have any drugs but when you go through child birth all you are focusing on is your newborn baby and what they will look like.Just breathe through the pain and you will be alright.I will be honest it does hurt but look at the bright side at the end of it you have a wonderful beautiful baby.

I hope this helps.

Natalie

Answer 10

PLEASE educate yourself. That will help a lot with the fear. Research and read about the Bradley method. Over 90% of those who use the Bradley method do not need pain medication. I have used it four times and it really works. The Bradley method uses total relaxation to prevent uterine cramps, which causes most of the pain women feel in labor. My labor was just a dull ache that came and went. I have had hunger pains before that were worse. My husband took a picture of me during a contraction. It looked like I was sleeping.