I was wondering what everyone thought about this question.
2007-12-14 18:58:09 · 31 answers · asked by xxeastbaycorexx 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I haven't done this yet. I was told by a married man that his wife was okay by him if he that he has sex with other women, and since I am not looking for ' just sex' and told him that, he went into how it would be more, and we would be buddies too and all that- I didn't really care, and I knew it was shady. I just was wondering what people thought about it. He told me that his wife dousn't give him any sex and told him to go right ahead.
Just wondering what people thought. I kind of knew what people whould think about it, but I just wanted a second opinion. you get kind of lonely sometimes though, being single for a while and start to question your morals.
2007-12-14 19:22:57 · update #1
what wife would really be okay with this? and what if anything will u ever hope to get out of the relationship? but something purely physical where u never will marry him, or be able to have him stay the night, or go places, and chances that his wife knows about this are slim. don't fall for his lies, its a game where he uses u for all he can get, and when u protest as u one day will, he will kick u to the curb so fast your head will swim.
2007-12-14 22:29:22 · answer #1 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some serious red flags here:
"I haven't done this yet. I was told by a married man that his wife was okay by him if he that he has sex with other women, and since I am not looking for ' just sex' and told him that, he went into how it would be more, and we would be buddies too and all that"
Uh-huh. Buddies. Well, it sounds like you're looking for more than just fvck buddies...which is all this guy is after. Read on...
"He told me that his wife dousn't give him any sex and told him to go right ahead. "
There's the tip-off. Open relationships and swinging can be healthy expressions in a marriage, but the marriage has to be rock-solid and healthy. His, obviously, is not.
If you really want to know how "open" his relationship is with his wife, tell him you want to speak directly to her to confirm his story. If she's given her blessing to him exploring his sexual options outside of marriage, and everything is on the up-and-up, he shouldn't bat an eye at giving you her number. If he balks, saying that she's okay with it, but she doesn't want to know who/when/where he gets it on with other women, that is a 100% sure-fire way to tell he's a sleazebag who doesn't actually have an open relationship. He just likes to call it that because "cheater" doesn't sit well on his conscience.
2007-12-16 15:38:29 · answer #2 · answered by intuition897 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you sat down with the wife and him together and talked this over and all was in agreement it would be ok, however this is a bad thing to do. It is hard to carry on a lasting "just sexual" encounter's without some type of bond between you two being established, and since you used the word date instead of one night stand, I am assuming that you want this to go on for a while.
2nd. If you do get involved with this man, and for some strange reason keep it to just sex, you are wasting your precious time that you could be finding a Good husband for you, and once this relationship is over, you will have this dark secret you will not want to tell your new lover, it will be a skeleton in your closet. and with std's on the rise, if they are in a open marriage, chances are that hes sleeping with you and 5 other people, and the wife is sleeping with him and 5 others, so you have a big triangle of chances of getting something you cannot cure.
2007-12-15 02:10:13 · answer #3 · answered by john d 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know about you..but I think people naturally become attached to their sexual partners. So to save you from the heartache in the long run just stay away from the guy. 1. I think him AND his wife has issuses. If sex was so impotant and he cannot masturbate they should consider a divorce. (This only proves his morale and commitment to any relationship or marriage) 2. He's a selfish person to even want to put a third person in his mingle of problems in his marriage. 3. Sex is not JUST sex, how about if you get pregant, diseases, my god you are opening up to a stranger. Sex should be sacred between to people, that you love perhaps. But with someone who is in a relationship. Unless you all are swingers or something, that's entirely different.
Good luck to you!
2007-12-15 05:18:27 · answer #4 · answered by ladida 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are lonely, go find yourself a man that is not married. He says, he is in a open marriage. Now that don't actually mean " he is in an open marriage". He would tell you anything . . .to get you to go to bed with you. You don't know men very well, do ya? Men are strange creatures and one of the things they do quite well, is lie! You have a lot of learning to do and it would be best for you, if you left this MARRIED man alone. Don't waste you time with someone like that. I also want to tell you that there are some men out there that are different, they are committed to their relationships . Please, don't let this man talk you into something you will later regret.>.And if you think for a half a second this man is going to leave his wife, think again. Most that have affairs, never do and if they do, its because their wives found out and threw them out. , they are too much of a mouse to do it on their own. They want to have their cake and eat it too..Don't be another notch in his bed post. . . .
2007-12-14 22:48:20 · answer #5 · answered by lucylocket7258 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is a lucky man!!! If you speak to his wife about it and it is ok then why not!!!! That is the only way a marriage could work anyway. Here are the facts of life you should learn now:
1. There is no Santa
2. There might be a Bigfoot
3. All men cheat, almost all women cheat
4. Marriage ruins relationships (moving in is the same)
5. Everyone lies (you even lie to yourself)
6. Life is not fair
Good luck and Happy Holidays. Email me
if you want to hear the truth. You can ask me anything.
I don't lie.
2007-12-15 01:15:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Marrage is more than a committment if you marry someone that should be the only person you ever want to be with both on an emotional and sexual level. If that doesn't apply to a person's relationship I suggest you end it before you waste many years of your life not being happy.
2007-12-15 02:50:39 · answer #7 · answered by jcpfaff4 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really don't think so in my personal opinion. Put yourself in his wife's situation...do you think you'd REALLY be ok with him sleeping with other women. I know tons of women who say they are ok with it, but deep down there is no way they really feel that way. BUT, i would say if you know that his wife really knows about it and is really "fine" with it then sure. And if you are really going to be fine with it later on down the road. When it starts getting serious, there aren't too many other places it can go since he's already married. You pretty much have to be willing to just mess around until it gets old.
2007-12-14 19:04:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
In a word, NO it is never OK to date a married man. He may say that they have an "open" relationship, but it means nothing. All he is trying to do is get you in the sack. Do not, under any circumstances get involved with a married man, it only leads to heartbreak and public humiliation.
2007-12-14 19:04:27 · answer #9 · answered by krystal272002 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think he is a horny liar and I have no idea how many women have fallen for that line of crap of his and gone to bed with him. Fast track to get an STD. Why would you even consider dating a married man anyway
2007-12-14 19:36:45 · answer #10 · answered by bigDcowgirl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋