2007-12-14 15:16:18 · 15 answers · asked by carebear 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Wow...that is definitely not cool. I can understand being cordial friends, but that is just inviting trouble. Talk to him and be honest with how you feel. Hopefully he will understand where your coming from. if not some marriage counseling is in order.
2007-12-14 15:22:20 · answer #1 · answered by Who Knew? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I see this in a different light than most do as my ex and I have been best of friends for the past 18 years and he and I talk all the time even if it is about our current spouses and any problems with each of them. Take comfort in knowing that he turned to someone familiar that does not have romantic designs on him and knows him well enough to point out what his faults are and how he can fix things when he screws them up with you. I guess the real question here should be - why could he not talk to you? Good luck with handling this but please sit down with your husband and ask him to talk to you as he would to her so you can work this out and not harbor any resentments that could rear their ugly heads at another time down the road.
2007-12-14 23:25:16 · answer #2 · answered by phxmilitarymom 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be thankful she was there for him when he needed to talk.
You're bothered by this because it makes you feel insecure about your relationship with your husband. You have to ask yourself "why"?
Perhaps you're worried about the possibility of your husband "falling back in love with her" or "cheating". Well, those things could happen, and if they're going to happen, they will happen no matter what you do.
And if your husband was going to cheat, he could do it in the middle of the day while you (or he) was at work and you'd likely never know. So why worry about that?
The man needed to talk, and for whatever reason, he didn't feel comfortable talking with you. Try not to worry about it. It's only when we become really attached to the outcome of things that we get upset, depressed, nervous, angry, or worried. Just relax and realize that you can't control everything in this life. I'm sure your husband's talk with the ex was harmless, and probably helped him.
2007-12-14 23:23:59 · answer #3 · answered by kyeri y 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No way and no how is that okay. If he is talking to another woman no matter who she is about things he cannot talk to you about then that is a HUGE red flag. He is going to connect with her on a level he is not connecting with you on. Guy friends...sure...have a blast but I refuse to be the second woman to anything in my husbands life. If he cannot talk to me about it and I know there are somethings he can't then he needs to go and talk to a guy friend or his dad or someone in our church. I am his number 1 woman and his best friend and vice versa and that is the way it should be! I never feel threatened or not worthy of what he needs. You need to put your foot down as his wife that this is not okay with you and if he doesn't care that this bothers you...you have more than just the ex-wife issues. You can let it go but I can gaurentee this is not going to come out right if you let it go.
2007-12-14 23:23:55 · answer #4 · answered by Army wife and mommy of 4!! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cannot deal with that. When you get marriage, you both need to turn to each other and to God only. When you put the rings on u all are on the inside and everything else is on the outside. The ring helps us remember that.
2007-12-14 23:20:12 · answer #5 · answered by heartsarebad 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to ask him why he can't talk to you as you are his wife now and not her.Tell him that this bothers you and you feel like this is going to create problems that you do not want.When he talks to you are you answering in the right way.Let him do the talking and see what he desires to know.Caring is helpful when he needs you, and for some reason he can't talk to you so you have to ask the question of why and only you can answer that
2007-12-14 23:27:13 · answer #6 · answered by mamaw2305 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds about right. I talk to my ex, usually about our kids, but at times we talk about other things.
My ex and i go back some 25 years (were married for 10) which is over 1/2 my age.
I don't think it's anything to get upset about.
2007-12-14 23:21:55 · answer #7 · answered by FlyingScooter 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
pray, pray pray... why is he gong to her you are his wife? for starters you need to ask him why he went to her and not you. then you need to find out why is he still tied to her like that. if he left her alone then he needs to leave her alone in all aspects of life. unless they have kids together. 2nd of all may be you are judgmental. and may be you need to figure out are you more of a listener or a talker. sometimes they don't always want your opinion. or maybe he could be afraid of what you would say or think. ask him and listen and try to fix you but that is very disrespectful he should love you more than that and respect you that is a no no!
2007-12-14 23:28:51 · answer #8 · answered by sweets_22193 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did he turn to you when he was married to her? If so, it's Karma. If not, he most likely still loves her. You should ask him how he feels about you and about her and hope he tells you the truth. You can make your decision from there.
2007-12-14 23:20:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should find someone else to turn to instead. No matter how helpful she may be- it's morally wrong. Tell him how it makes you feel.
2007-12-14 23:20:30 · answer #10 · answered by ṼξŋØლǿԱ§ 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋