Revenge Ideas?

Question

I'm an animal care student and I recently wrote to a local shire horse sanctuary asking for some work experience. The lady who rang we was lovely and I was really excited. Anyway, this morning I went along, really enthusiastic and dying o meet the horses. But the man who owns the place was a complete b*st*rd. At first I thought he was just a bit doddery or something but then I realised he was definatetly being rude, and not just that but a real bully. Another girl turned up who was new and he'd already mentioned he thought she took drugs- no evidence though, and he proceeded to point at her and make remarks right in front of her face. He said she had as much life in heras a dead duck. He shouted at you and criticised you when you didn't even do anything. He laughed at everything I said, and when he asked me about my course or posed a question and I answered he laughed at the reply and kept saying- 'what do you know about this/that...(implying I was stupid)' and he tutted and shouted at

me everytime I tried to do what he said. He talked to me like I was a piece of dirt and the stupidest person he'd ever met. I ended up walking out. The people there told me to ignore him but I have been brought up to have pride. I don't feel I should have to put up with that sort of treatment- but neither should I miss out. At the least I now feel like getting some revenge. Any ideas? I'm not criminal and will not take to violence, burning his house down, killing him or hurtng his animals (God forbid they're lovely).. But he deserves it.

I don't feel it's petty. The way he made me feel- it was all I could do to not cry in front of him. I was really hurt. REALLY hurt. He had no right to treat me like that, and on behalf of other genuine people out there past, present and future, and think the evil old man deserves a good shock.
Like I said I would not do anything awful.

Some people may find it easy to say that I'm just being weak and he was trying to toughen me up- but I don't think that's true. He was horrible- I went there willing to do anything asked of me, and I have a lot of knowledge from study I've done. Being shot down like that was not something I have to tolerate. And I hardely think all people in the 'horse world' are like that- if they are then I will happily go against the flow because I'm a nice person.
I don't have to change.

I'm quite a sensitive person so even if I stayed I'd have just ended up very sad and hurt- I wouldn't 'toughen-up' because I'm too soft. But that's no reason why I shouldn't work with horses. I can't understand how anyone could think it was MY problem. What a sad outlook on life some people must have to think they have to be put up with that sort of treatment and just accept being repressed.

Answer 1

Revenge will only make YOU look like the jerk.

Be the better person. The man's comments/attitude were most likely not personal. Take this as a lesson in self-restraint and remember, sometimes the best revenge is to live well!

For example, I worked for a man like this, bought a problem horse from him that he said was worthless and dangerous, and turned him into a nice trail riding horse (19 hh Belgian Draft).

Anyways, the man was pulling a car out of the ditch with his tractor one day. The tractor wasn't running when my horse and I rode up, but as we passed, the man ran to his tractor and started it. The tractor back-fired (like it always did) and my horse didn't even care. I looked back to see the man turn around to look at us, he had a nasty look on his face. He had intentionally tried to spook my horse (When this man had the horse, the horse spooked and bucked at everything). He looked shocked to see that my horse did not spook/buck me off. There were several people that saw him. Everyone knew what he had tried to do. I didn't even say anything, just rode on by. THAT was my revenge. THAT felt better than anything else I could possibly have done.

Answer 2

Yikes what a royal d***

This is going to sound like a cliche but the best revenge is living well and finding an even better placement.

This is not about you, it's about him. Maybe he picks on people b/c he's hoping someone will give him the "attention" of telling him where to stuff it. He'd probably love you if you treated him worse than he treated you. :P

You have several options, I would certainly document his abuse with the school, and I would absolve yourself of any blame. You didn't do anything wrong and nothing you could have said or done (aside from hitting him upside the head with a fire extinguisher :P) would have shut him up.

It is a testament to your inner strength that you walked away and did not strike him, because he sounds like he loves to bear bait people.

Bullies are usually quite lonely and hateful towards themselves. You don't need revenge b/c you have the satisfaction/pity of knowing that -the horrible man you had to deal with for a few hours.... HE has to deal with 24/7.

Although I must say, Lisa M's idea did get a snicker from me.

EDIT: I just wanted to add something that has helped me heal from encounters with people like this. Everyone is eager to tell us what we "need" or "should" do, but we aren't often given a "how" so that we can overcome what troubles us.

1) My strategy for people I find in the spectrum of dislike to loathe is this: I find one thing I can love about them.

It can be something as simple as the way they pronounce a word, a stray eyebrow hair, or their big, ugly nose that if they were drawn into a cartoon might even be cute, or the care that they show their animals, the fact that they like the colour green, anything.

2) This in no way absolves his s***** behaviour nor does it justify how you were treated, this is for YOU and YOUR mental health, not his, screw him.

3) When you've found your thing, no matter how small, focus on it. What this does is change him in your mind from the big, ugly a****** that hurt you into a vulnerable human being. It equalizes him in your mind so that you now have power over him. He can't hurt you b/c he's now vulnerable and you know something about him that no-one else does, you can laugh at the chink in his armor.

I'm not sure if I've put this into the right words, and I won't say that it is easy, I am still struggling to find the "one thing" to apply to my old boss, but I offer it as an exercise that might eventually bring you some mental peace and stress reduction.

Answer 3

That really was not right for him to do that....He is just a prideful, arrogant man that thinks he knows everything. I would have done the same thing walking out like you.
This may sound a little silly but I think the best revenge you could get right now is by never going back there. He is going to miss out on a really good and loyal employee. Too bad for him.
If you really want this job though, don't do anything to him...Just be as kind and sweet as possible. Maybe bring him some cookies or something...lol. Soften him up a bit. Show him that you know what your doing.

Hope this helps! Good luck and Have a very Merry Christmas!

Answer 4

Forget all ideas of revenge for a start. You just experienced what total a**holes some people can be. Have a chat with your course tutor, explain what happened ( so she can dissuade anyone else from going there.) He has just talked himself out of free labor for a while. Look around for another place to do your work experience at.
Just because you are a student ( therefore free worker) does not mean that you should accept being treated like this.
My daughter's work experience was totally messed up by a woman at a dog grooming place who promised her 5 weeks but ended up being half a day a week and all she did was clean windows and sweep up. She had to make up for the lousy work experience ( and had a job getting the stupid woman to sign the forms as well)

Answer 5

As a student on any kind of work experience, you have rights, and those are that, the placement you are sent to, affords you every opportunity to learn, and that respect is given to both the placement employer, and towards the student at that placement.
Absolutely you 'do NOT' stand for any physical, verbal or mental abusive of any kind, irrespective of anybody's age. (this does not give anyone licence to be rude and condesending etc)

The lady you spoke to has probably no idea what's been going one and about this mans attitude, find out who she's employed by.

This matter should be reported urgently, whist the incident is fresh in your mind.

Write a 'factual' letter, in full, with all the verbal abusive comments that was said, and if you can write one letter, you and this other girl, ( both being witnesses to each other), then this would co-oberate the events, but keep copies for yourselves, signed and dated.

Send copies to your Principle at college, the Education Department, Local Authority, the employer of this Sanctuary, (if this man is not the employer, or even if he is), adding who you have sent copies to etc, regarding your grievences.

Above all, treat your placement as a 'one off' bad experience, and make that well known, so that no-one else is sent there, until this can be sorted. ( inform your parents the reasons why, they will help you, and say that your too upset to return.).

Finally, don't go for 'revenge', this will go against you, and make 'you' out to be the 'villian', don't let this, put you off what you want to be and what you want to achieve.

This placement will be one that will be/should be taken off the register, and you'll be doing this for any other students that follows on closely behind you (especially the girls/women, to whom this guy, obviously takes great sadistic pleasure in insulting).

Good luck with your future and career.

a friend x

ps. Merry Christmas

Answer 6

i agree with most of the other answers. im a veterinary technician (mostly house pets) but when i first began my training/orientation at a prestigious animal hospital we were all put through "hell week", named by previous students. the week was exactly how the name said it would be. we were made to work with the meanest, most impatient doctor. this doctor was also known mostly for euthanizing animals; that was what he did most. well he yelled at me, asked me very hard questions, had me running all over doing errands and i believe i helped euthanize ten pets that week. bottom line: HE is the doctor that made me a good vet tech today.its because of him that the other doctors were so impressed with my quickness and knowledge. he was grooming us into vet techs during the whole time we were complaining about wanting to be vet techs. if you respect this guy then work extra hard, have all the answers(or learn them!) and remember that this period is only so that you can do this on your own later. keep your chin up and never let him see you cry; thats what the other students are for. have a clever response ready for the next time he laughs at you or says you dont know anything. surely there is something that you know and he doesnt. find it. he's probably testing your toughness so pass the test! if it doesnt kill you it makes you stronger. funny enough the veterinary field is competitive and full of hopefuls who would take a little yelling for the chance to do what you are doing. stay strong girl~ good luck. i make $19/hr. now so HAHAHA mean doctor LOL
P.S revenge is stupid and juvenile especially when you are trying to get a big-girl job

Answer 7

A lot of animal sanctuaries are run by persons who are, even by the broadest standards, barking mad. I have personal experience of several. It was a horrible situation from you, but try to put it behind you. The guy sounds as if he's losing it. No one should be treated disrespectfully, but he is possibly going senile...sounds like it anyway. I once had a boss like that, she was a vile woman! I only stayed so my young horse could have good grazing. Soon as he was old enough I was out of there. Chin up, and find another work experience place and warn other people on your course not to go there!

Answer 8

Where was that? HOW DARE HIM? Seriously, I could talk to him about that if you want to, let that other girl come along as well, BTW some people do that because of problems they have, or when they lack things, jealousy etc so he might be one of those, or he might be treating all the women like this because he had a bad experienc with a woman before or CAN'T Get one, so if he is one of those people, isn't it better to forget about this revenge thing my dear? but I think it is better to tell those who he works for about his behaviour to stop upsetting other people in the future. If you think that he is bad that he might also take an action against you if you will revenge then please forget all about it, you don't know, maybe when he finds that other people don't react rudely to him, that makes him just feel worse, you have better things to worry about or to do something about it, don't waste your energy, but I know and understand that it is hard to let it go especially when that hurted your feelings and especially when you didn't do anything to make him treat like that =(
How can I help you ?
Please take care and stay away from the bad guys.

Answer 9

A really sad experience for you to encounter. I would say, at my old age, revenge has a way of eating you up on the inside; it may feel great at the moment but I guarantee you'll pay for it twice and for that it isn't worth it. You've suffered enough. Don't worry, with a person this nasty it will return to bite him big time just in the experience of living.

You've got your whole life ahead of your..enjoy!! There are so many horse people out there who are truly worth knowing and they'll be willing to help you. Just remember, for every door that slams shut, another one opens...keep looking, you'll find that great situation for your work experience!!! Good Luck.

Edit; Lisa M....loved your solution, just cracked me up..LOL

I do know some fraternity brothers who paid dearly for standing up their dates...remedied with your recipe!! I knew that recipe looked familar!!

Edit: Sorry, I cannot endorse the verbal/mental abuse of another.....bullying is nasty business and should never be endorsed or tolerated. It demonstrates nothing other than the promulgator hasn't full mental capacity and is suffering from limited speech capacities....

Do not attempt to put lipstick on that pig!!!!!

Answer 10

Forget the revenge.

Doing anything like that will make you look malicious at best, and criminal at worst. Word of it WILL get out, and might cause you troubles in getting another job, or even continuing your studies in animal care.

It's too bad that people like this have responsibility over animals or other people, but you can't do anything about that right now. You CAN move on, find another job, and do the best you can in your field. In the long run, you'll be much better off than stooping to something petty like revenge just because someone made you feel bad for an hour or three.