Want to 'teach' hubby a lesson, need suggestions please???

Question

I want to let him know how it feels from the other side.....he spends a lot of time at a particular restaurant, long leisurely lunches making friends with the waitresses. I want to find a hang-out of my own, so that I can start name dropping (hunky male waitstaff) and even txt messaging and inviting my new opposite sex friend over to hang out with us. I think it's only fair, otherwise he's not going to understand how I REALLY FEEL. I live in the southeastern US. What are some good places to go (has to be during the day while kids are in school)????????? Where do they have a reputation for having hunky male waitstaff??????

EDIT: Hey y'all, I have told him how I feel, without the games and drama, it doesn't seem to stop him. In all other aspects of our marriage, things are great and I am not by nature a game player....but he is the type of person who sometimes puts on blinders until you 'smack' him in the face with an example! LOL

Answer 1

Two wrongs have never made something right. And revenge on your own husband???? I think you should try telling him how you REALLY feel first.

Answer 2

Playing mind games does not work if you want to have any kind of a decent marriage. These "I'll make him jealous/I'll get even" games are best suited for high school.

You are capable of explaining in words how you feel, not stunts. "Fair"? No. Two wrongs do not make a right. They make a divorce.

If you can't trust him and think he may be doing inappropriate things, time to leave. If you have no reason to think that but are still this jealous, time to get some self esteem. He married you for a reason, has that changed? Perhaps he is not getting the attention and validation he needs from you?

Find a way to rekindle the passion or decide it is unsalvageable. No one will benefit from your plan of attack.

Answer 3

With kids in the middle of this, it is a very dangerous game to play. Two wrongs will never, ever, make a right. You need to make him realize how you feel without compromizing your integrity and sinking low to his level. You are smart, I'm sure you can come out with a better solution...good luck

Answer 4

I don't think anywhere is truly "known" for hunky mail wait staff as you put it. Just try places like Applebee's, TGI Friday's, Ruby Tuesday's, etc. Just be careful, because you never know what you might end up getting yourself into.

Answer 5

take the high road. you have children, set an example.

go hang out with your friends, but be careful of that new friend. make yourself feel better, then try to really talk to your husband. if he's still not getting it, request counseling. if that doesn't work, pack yourself and the kids, and high tail it. he sounds like he enjoys a bit of a chase.

to me, it sounds like he's crossed that fine line of faithfulness.

Answer 6

What makes you think some "hunky male waiter" is going to want to sit around texting YOU???

I mean, seriously.....this is so juvenile I cannot believe I am waisting my time typing this....

Answer 7

You can give him a wake up call by demanding you be heard and threatening to move on. Two wrongs don't make a right. And if you can't communicate with him, and he doesn't "hear" your concerns, then by definition it's not a healthy union.

Answer 8

I would just go and grab a girlfriend and have some fun, why would you want to sit at a restaurant? I think that would be borrrring, thats weird he does that, lol.

Answer 9

Serious game playing results in serious discord.

Get to the crux of the matter, your jealousy.

Presumably the outgoing, friendly nature of this guy is what attracted you. What has changed to make you want to get back at him for his personality?

Answer 10

That will only make your delima worse>This is a deaster looking for a place to happen>Fix it or leave it>Playing with it won't done anything>