Im a really private person but recently i told two friends some of the secrets that have been building up for the last couple of years. I just did it one evening, but since then i am constantly worried and fell exposed. I hate it and find myself trying to distance myself from them now and i don't know why. Whats wrong with me? Why cant i tell people things?
2007-12-14 05:11:27 · 18 answers · asked by des 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
You fear that people can use information to hurt or control you. And you, like everyone else, prefer to remain unhurt and in control.
Examine what it is about that information that makes you feel it should be a secret. Why is it so bad? Who are the people you don't you want to know these things? What would be the worst thing that would happen if they knew; would you be ashamed or embarrassed or would they call the police etc?
In reality, unless you have a vice or a secret life of crime very little would happen if they knew, I suspect.
2007-12-14 05:31:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a person who does not know what to keep private unless told specifically, I may be out of line. I think it is your intuition and you should trust it and develop it further. I am trying to trust my intuition Even if it doesn't make sense. I know it has protected me, so I treat it like a trusted adviser.
I am trying to learn to be safer, but probably doing even more harm to myself by posting on line. I do not know how easy it is to trace back to me, but need some advice I can't get in person after great effort. So what choice do I have? If you feel you need to tell, go to a forum at a library instead of your computer and make a new identity and share.
Don't use the id on your computer or give place clues.
If you are fearful of people controlling you/blackmail or what they think of you, don't give that kind of information. It is important to be open and trusting of at least some friend. Can you talk to these friends about how you feel now? Ask if they can advise you about telling them. Do they feel it is appropriate? Do they think they are supportive of your trust and opening up to them? Would they share that information? Or tell similar about themselves? Talk to a pastor imam priest etc or a therapist who cannot share. See what they advise for being more open and sharing what is appropriate.
2007-12-14 06:14:10 · answer #2 · answered by carmen v 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm like that I tell people things and then I get all like "oh no what have I done, should I call them and tell them not to tell anyone else?" probably what happened is back when you were little someone possibly told a secret of yours so it left you feeling vulnerable and exposed. And the distance part says to me that you're embarrassed by what you told them. Which I'm guessing you probably don't need to be.
2007-12-14 05:16:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Theres nothing wrong with you. You just are a private person. But its good to have someone to confide in, in which you can tell your secrets to and once you do it, just relax...people do it all the time. If you don't share things, it can get to you and make you feel worse. Just breathe and reassure yourself. ask your friends, tell them how you feel and that you are a private person so therefore keep your information private.
2007-12-14 05:15:33 · answer #4 · answered by therearetwosidestoeveryquestion 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well you must not trust them enough to tell them anything. You got to learn how to trust more. But if that don't work relax try mediating then if they expose you kick their asses. After you kick *** and take names lay back watch a movie eat pizza, pop, candy, or ice cream to smooth the day off. Hope i was of help
2007-12-14 05:16:06 · answer #5 · answered by MzFoxi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nothing is wrong with you!You just a natural awareness!Look if u are not sure to tell people secrets, than dont do it.There is a reason for you being frightended of beeing exposed.There are many people out ther you can not trust.!
But you have to give people a chance to prove their credibility..if you tell people things dont run away.You did tell them things and than you have to face this situation.Give them a chance to prove that they dont disrespect you and that they wont expose your secrets.
sorry for my english i am from germany!
2007-12-14 05:19:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
it sounds similar to a problem i have
i have a problem gettin close to men always have thats how i got my nickname heartbreaker i try to distance myself from guys especially wonce they have hit me where it hurts
right in the heart
you sound much like me
maybe your just scared to open up because you have and unknown fear of losing someone scared that they will be taken away
i cant tell you why i dont even know myself
it gets better just dont let it get the best of you
2007-12-14 05:18:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need a bit of confidence -- you are who you are, people must take it or leave it.
Whatever you think of yourself and your secrets you are almost certainly not odd or unusual - don't be embarssed or worried - life is to short to waste on such things.
Get back with your friends and chill - be yourself, your just fine.
2007-12-14 05:21:32 · answer #8 · answered by P P 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you're afraid of letting your guard down. You might not like them knowing such personal information about you, but a real friend won't judge you, and they'll help you through your problems.
2007-12-14 06:52:10 · answer #9 · answered by English Rose (due 2nd May) 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you dont trust them and that you think there gonna tell someone else. You need to build up your trust
2007-12-14 05:15:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋