About ten days back I was partying hard at friend's place. While driving back I was unable to control my car and hit a woman! I got her admitted in a pvt. nuring home and made all arrangements for her treatment. I contacted her husband and explained everything. We met at the hospital when he came to visit his wife. The guy was drunk and insisted on been paid for the mishap. I found out that the lady is the only one with a regular income. Her husband is alcoholic and abuses her. He also shouted at her in the hospital saying that this served her right and should be a lesson. He never came again to visit her! Now I have to visit her every day. She insists on this; gets the hospital staff to contact me over phone if I miss a day. She wants me to promise her not to leave her ever. Yesterday I had to promise to be able to pacify her. I want to help her in the present condition, but I have my own life. I am in a big big mess, it's driving me crazy. Please help!
2007-12-13 19:45:14 · 25 answers · asked by chamkadaar 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Admitted that I did a great misdeed; could have been worse! Am not looking for sympathies. Of course, I don't wanna go to the police (vijay m - thanks). Can't trace the husband and she's uncooperative to give details of other family members. Hospital hasn't told me yet about their action. I guess they too are business minded - already they found additional health issues (not related to the accident) for which I'm paying. Well, I don't mind paying for all the treatments, but I need my personal space & time. My life is my personal thing!
2007-12-13 20:48:43 · update #1
you have done right thing, by admitting her in hospital. as far as possible you can pay for her medicines and hospital, but u cant be with her forever. you better contact her husband and give him the money needed for her treatment. you can give lil bit more just to be on safer side and kiss goodbye to both husband and wife. i hope this helps you
2007-12-13 19:51:11 · answer #1 · answered by Kassanovic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From someone who is a lover of people, and want nothing but the best for all of them, here is my answer: You are not obligated to this woman. She needs help, and you need to relay this information to the nurse!! She's desperate for you, because you are the only person who is showing her some genuine concern. There is no harm in visiting her, and keeping in touch, since you did hit her while driving drunk! You're lucky you didn't kill her by the way. Didn't you get in trouble for this? Anyway, cover your ***, because if a lawyer catches wind of this, the lady and her husband will probably sew you. Ween her off I would say. And the best thing is to again tell the nurse that she is being abused. Good luck
2007-12-14 03:55:15 · answer #2 · answered by Lindsay S 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, look. She's in a mess, you helped to put her in a mess even if the whole husband thing isn't your fault. So why don't you try just being there for someone who has nothing? Wait until she is better. She'll thank you for it.
If she starts getting all psycho and asking too much then that's your cue to back away. You'll know what feels right. But deserting the woman you ran over is a big mistake.
2007-12-14 03:50:13 · answer #3 · answered by Bloop 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hiya babe, we all make mistakes in life some big.. and some small.. the best thing to do is try and make the best of this situation on one hand u have helped the woman as best u possibly can, don't let the guilt of that fateful night make you feel obliged to start paying out money because it wont end there . you have to understand that you have tryed your hardest to make up for what happened and you have done more than some people would ever do. DONT be forever in there debt .also don't let them suck you in to there life the husband is an abuser she dealt with it before you ever came on the seen - her health is your problem not her personal life . take care xxx
2007-12-14 04:07:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That sucks and seeing how one of my closest friends just went though something similar I sympathize with this women. I know without the love and support of her family my friend would not have made it through her hospital stay and her therapy. And now she has more therapy to go though but it as home with her family. My advice to you is to try to contact her family. Try to get her family more active in her recovery then slowly stop your visits. Maybe after a few days or weeks you can stop going because she will have the love and support of her family. After all that's what she really needs. I'm not saying track down the husband. I mean kids, aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters, cousins. Maybe they can console her and you won't have to. Just a thought.
2007-12-14 03:55:58 · answer #5 · answered by babycakes6775 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My Dear Friend..... First of all you have commited a crime by drinking and rash driving..... Secondly you didn't vanish from the scene and instead helped her.... very few people do these kind of things....
You are right at you part... but there may be some prob with the women also so that's why her husband has turned to a drukered.... well i advice you to just be like a friend .... and try to make her come off it and tell her your prob...
2007-12-14 05:26:57 · answer #6 · answered by Gobind 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't run away from that lady, in the condition she's in, she feels u're the only person to talk too so if u leave her,don't be surprised to hear she has packed not Co's her condition is bad but simply Co's she will be left a lone in the world. does she has kids or any body?, please help the poor lady walk out of the hospital be4 u do anything
God bless u
Good luck
2007-12-14 03:59:35 · answer #7 · answered by Jackson W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My suggestion would be to go to the police department and explain everything that happened as you have done on here. They can get her help to get away from her husband. It seems to me that you are going above what would be required of you. You stopped, helped her get the care she needed, are paying for it, and you visit her. If what you are saying is correct she is trying to hang on to you to help keep her from going back to a bad situation. You need to find someone else that can help her professionally. Good luck to you and to her....
2007-12-14 03:52:33 · answer #8 · answered by susanmarq66 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have done your duty by admitting her in the hospital and taking care of her till now. Since her husband is an alcoholic and no income, you stand by side of her till she is completely recovered, depends your getting time for that.. Whatever possible you can give her help.
It's driving you crazy, because you have driven in drousy.
2007-12-14 04:17:59 · answer #9 · answered by chidambaram k 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear, If you are married too then get of this immediately because you have completed your task and if you are a bachelor and want to enjoy with her this drama then keep on going because ultimately you will be the looser because at the end of the day you will be fixed with a second hand material in your hand.
2007-12-14 03:54:13 · answer #10 · answered by nasirshussain 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋