Is it possible to not be an introvert can u be outgoing and talk more?

Question

What i really want someone to answer is being an introvert unreversable or can i be more extroverted im sick not telling anyone my opinion but can I change. My health teacher said "you can't change if your introverted or extroverted". Is this trure or can i make a giant difference in how i live.Because going to a new school really sucks and I really want to have a girlfirend this year and i really need one answer to change this if there are any suggestions please type away

Answer 1

Sounds like your health teacher wasn't clear ....

People generally can't change if one is introverted/extroverted, but an introvert CAN learn how to become more extroverted, and vice versa.

Psychology is not destiny. You can learn how to be more extroverted. It just takes practice.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Being introverted or extroverted isn't like a light switch, it's more like a see-saw or a slide. It's a continuum. You can change quite a bit. You should get comfortable talking to a wide variety of people. Try talking to people one-on-one first, and then two people at a time. Also, try signing up for theatre classes. Everyone has to do the same things, and many of them are silly, so you can come out of your shell during the practice sessions.

Answer 3

Don't listen to your health teacher. "Introvert" and "extravert" are too limiting - nobody is just ONE thing; people are complex and have many, many traits that make up a "personality" (I took a whole psych class in college on "Theories of Personality" and I still don't know what a personality is! hah anyway...) The unique thing about humans is that we have the ability to change and grow. You have every right to be what you want if you're not happy with the way you are right now.

With that said, baby steps! Every day try talking to someone new or saying one or a few more things to someone. At least once a day (or maybe week even, be kind to yourself lol), raise your hand and speak up in at least one class if you're not comfortable with that (I always hated speaking up in class). I also found that making small talk with strangers made me feel better about myself, because I was *pretending* to be an outgoing person, which made me feel like I *am* one. Waiters, store clerks, any other strangers you come in contact with in everyday settings, try being extra polite, or ask for something even if you don't need it (like when you're in a store and a clerk asks you if you need help finding anything, say yes and use them as practice for feeling more comfortable in social situations). The good thing about starting with strangers is that - ironically you would think it's harder with strangers, but - they're people you've never seen before and will probably never see again, so you don't have to worry so much about what they think of you. And even if you feel like you said/did something stupid, chances are they either didn't notice, or in a matter of moments they'll have forgotten about you anyway.

As for people you do have to see regularly, again, baby steps. If someone acts nice to you, act nice back - "fake it till you make it" - as in, act like an outgoing person, and you'll start to feel like one and they'll see you as an approachable, fun person. Think of small talk you can make with anyone around you (like if you have a teacher who's a d*ck, make a comment to someone in your class; or ask about a homework assignment, ask if they read the material/what they thought about it - the conversation doesn't even have to last long, just *small talk*. Chances are if you do it just one time, they'll reciprocate and strike up a convo with you next time. Always start small, and with each time you will feel a tiny bit more comfortable and less tense/self-conscious.

It will be painful and hard; you will have small setbacks or embarrassments, but so does everyone. Nobody wants to be disliked, so everyone is their own biggest critic. You have to feel confident from within as well, so remind yourself that you are smart, funny, interesting, fun to be around, and worthy of friends; cheesy as that sounds, good social skills come from good self-esteem. Also keep in mind, "introverts" are usually more sensitive, thoughtful, conscientious, considerate, kinder people who think before they speak and don't feel a narcissistic need to hear themselves talk or be the center of attention all the time. Not a bad thing. =)

Good luck! Being shy sucks, but being in introvert doesn't have to. You can still be reserved without being a mute. Just takes a lot of work. But if you really want this bad enough, you can pull it off!