I love my husband dearly but it is sometimes bothersome that he doesn't listen to my needs and concerns. He just retired from the military which I didn't like much at all for the 8 years I lived of the 20 with him. I always dreamed of a 50's type of lifestyle due to all the time away and unpredictable lifestyle and he knew and agreed to slow things down and find a job to be home at night etc. once he retired at 20 years. After trying one home business that didn't supply a steady enough income I caved and offered for him to be a vol EMT or firefighter (which firefighter was never on my fav list) but something he always wanted to do. I had been on him for nearly a year to get in better shape and I got my wish now that I agreed to the volunteer thing. (I feel hurt that he didn't do it for me but now is going to the gym.) I feel as if my needs and wishes are 1/2 heard and he is always giving to the community, and 50% to what I want. Our love life is down and he wonders why.
2007-12-13 13:19:17 · 10 answers · asked by TennesseeGirl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
OOOH stop now you have a wonderful husband who loves you your around the age where menopause is coming on go check with your doctor.
You have the blue's that is it and your a good wife for letting him fallow his dream.
Things could be allot worse look at some of these post
men cheating men wearing wife underwear men beating the wife.
Thanks god for your husband everyday.
Good luck
2007-12-13 13:23:36 · answer #1 · answered by lisalisa 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
As a military retiree myself I can understand part of it. The excitement of some of the jobs in the military, it's hard to come down and be "normal" again. It will take time, persistance, and patience on your part to help him "retire". Start going to the gym with him. Do things he likes to do. Become more a part of his working life. Then he will allow you to become more of a loving wife.
Keep talking and telling him how you feel. Communication is good even if he only hears half of it. Half is much better than in many marriages.
Also, try to put more spice into your love life. Find new and exciting things to make him want to be home in your arms more than out working out.
Make up special date nights at least once a week.
Remember if he knows there's something at home worth coming home to he'll come home more and more often.
2007-12-13 13:28:03 · answer #2 · answered by Cliff R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
men are unpredictable they don't consider or even think about what makes a women a happy; most of them if not all are very self centered and selfish in a way. they want or expect women to settle for very little and then they play dumb when we are mad as if they don't know what they have done to cause that reaction in us. if he trully loves you he would recognize his fault and will try to make it up, make it better and if he doesn't feel the same then your life will be a living hell and it will be up to you to try to understand that as a man he might not change and you will have to live with it to keep the relationship alive that is if is still there. remember that as a wife you play many roles, the counselor the mother the friend the lover if you love him you will be patient and will help him decide what is more important the woman he pledge love to or his job? he either choose one or he will create a balance in the situation and if he doesn't do either one of them then it will be time to move on... good luck! may the stars be with you
2007-12-13 14:53:08 · answer #3 · answered by Mariela 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay......I do understand that us women have needs and we like to be emotionally supported, as well as physically attended to. But marriages have ups and downs in all areas. Maybe this is a "down" for you, but just think about all the good times you have had and make those memories get you through until the next "up". Like others have mentioned, be happy to have what you have....see the cup half full instead of half empty! As long as your husband isn't abusive, consider yourself blessed. This is a rough world we live in.
2007-12-13 13:37:56 · answer #4 · answered by Marlene U 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you can make yourself a happy person. It sounds like he is trying to find out what he wants to do, and you should be supportive of him. Remember that you are the one that needs to make your life happy for you too. I bet that once you take all your energy off of what he is doing or not doing and focus on what you want to do, you will see a change in him.
I think your husband sounds like a great guy. Get busy with your own intersts.
2007-12-13 13:33:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Normally your beauty makes me dizzy.... now this question has exceeded even that dizziness....... What if your hubby's online wife had a girl on the side who had an online hubby who had an online mistress.... omg... I think I just.....um.....
2016-05-23 11:25:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Count your blessings and stop making a mountain out of a mole hill. Call up some of your girlfriends and hear their complaints and divorce stories, you'll feel much better!
2007-12-13 13:27:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come on stop complaining and enjoy life with your husband.
2007-12-13 13:25:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
show him this question, perferably on here, but if neccesary, type it up and make sure he reads it. That is, don't have it to him when he's about to go to work, or is watching the game.
2007-12-13 13:24:10 · answer #9 · answered by pansyblue 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh stop whining and grow the hell up!
2007-12-13 17:58:39 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋