My friend got pregnant out of wedlock and she is afraid her family will find out. I am a starving students but I let her stay with me without paying bills, foods, or rent. The father of her baby wanted to be part of the baby's life but she dismissed him. I thought that she should allow him to be part of the baby's life if he is the biological father. She got mad at me and said that I betrayed her. He has no history of ever maltreating her. She even told me that she plans on marrying him. After the baby came out, she left her baby for the father and moved to a different state. He was heartbroken and the poor baby had no mother. I was happy that the father is taking care of the baby. How can I support somebody who abandones her own baby? I need a second opinion on this. I don't know if she has post partum depression or not. Do you think this friendship worth saving? why or why not.
2007-12-13 12:36:37 · 6 answers · asked by Gurio 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
She did not move out of states until AFTER the baby comes out. Before that, she was living with me. What I don't understand is that the father of the baby treats her like a queen catering to her every wimps. That's the confusing part.
2007-12-13 12:51:35 · update #1
she has not been back to see the baby or the father for a year now
2007-12-13 12:56:01 · update #2
well, at first i don't wouldn't know what to think. (?)
well, if she's depressed then get her undepressed by cheerfullness, then tell her to get her butt out there, take care of the baby, or atleast get a job and pay SOME of your bills or atleast food. you are TOO kind, i must say!
:)
love,, savannah
2007-12-13 12:50:18 · answer #1 · answered by S81 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm confused. You are living in a different state with this friend? Are you still letting this friend live with you? If so, I don't understand what your involvement is with the friend. However, I will say that there are many reasons she might not want to be with the baby's father, even if he did not maltreat her. There are plenty of bad relationships out there; you cannot know unless you are in it. But, she might have mental health problems, whether she has post partum depression or not. She may have done the baby a favor by leaving it behind if she was not prepared to be a good mother. But you should be happy the father is part of the baby's life. No one can tell you whether you should still be friends with the woman, but if she has mental health problems, she probably needs all the friends she can get; she certainly may be confused, if nothing else. You did a good thing, anyway.
2007-12-13 12:47:43 · answer #2 · answered by eldots53 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been through a similar situation. In my situation, we were in a new class. Let's call my friend Frank. Frank was the nicest person ever, until the start of the new year, new grade. Frank was assigned a buddy, and the buddy absolutely LOATHED Frank because Frank was nice. Frank really wanted to fit in, so she changed. She became a new person, new haircut, new friends. She forgot all about us, and I don't have the guts to do anything about it. But, YES the friendship is worth it, you are going to need it so badly. You need to get her back! Invite her for a sleepover, play the favorite band, if she tells you she doesn't like it, ignore it. Play your favorite game again, make it just like it used to be. In some ways, it's not her fault she has changed. She's only human, she wants to fit in. If acting like you used to doesn't work, talk to her friends about it, the ones who have changed her and the ones who she hangs out with. You might need to get together with the old friends and work out a plan. Friendships are indeed, worth it.
2016-04-09 01:46:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
unfortunately people in this world can be so thoughtless but yes i think it could be postnatal stress, she had the baby but has no idea how to cope or deal with it so she is pretending it does not exist and cutting it and anything to do with it out of her life. get her help she needs it badly, ask her to go see someone, try and be there for the father and the baby but just visiting and get a good relationship built. that way when she is ready you know where the baby and also you want to help, raising a baby all by yourself is so hard, hes going to need all the help he can get.
if she refuses then let her go, if someone can be so heartless to her own flesh and blood id hate to see how she treats her friends. good luck!
2007-12-13 12:44:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no. she doesnt even care about her baby. it seems like she's being a brat. drop her and if she crawls back to u, tell her why ur pissed
2007-12-13 12:41:17 · answer #5 · answered by ChristianRider14 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No
2007-12-13 12:42:29 · answer #6 · answered by spencer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋