I've gain a lot of weight and lost my confidence! how can i regain it?

Question

since i got married i gainde a lot of weight , i have no confindece and it leads to lots of insecurity. i'm constantly thinking my husband is sleeping around cuz i'm not attractive anymore or at least in my eyes i'm not, i put myself down constantly , does anyone have any suggestions? i'm ruining my marriage

Answer 1

Sounds like hubby ain't going out of his way to compliment and build your self esteem. You need to love yourself just as you are, then your self image will change and this,in turn, will improve your self esteem. Mention it to your hubby also, though I'm sure you put yourself down in front of him, maybe he'll verbalize his desire for you more which also helps improve self-esteem. Remember, your as hot as you think you are!

Answer 2

Weight will be never a problem,suppose if a guy married a girl and after marriage she gained weight will he leave him NO like ways now a days gaining weight also a huge advantage.If you wear a dress which is full tight and if you are slim then will it suit you NO but if you have some wait and wear it every one on the road will look at you and even accidents may occur so take care first. At 5.7 i think it will be better to have wait than just slim like a pole. Let me give a hint just try a dress which fits you perfect and go on the road then atleast one accident must happen.

Answer 3

Believe with all your heart that you are a very attractive, confident woman. You are worthy and deserving of love from your husband. Your thoughts just have to catch up with what you believe in your heart. When you begin to feel good about yourself on the inside then you'll start to feel better about the outside whether or not you lose the weight. Then everyone else will recognize your confidence too.

I recommend reading the Confident Woman by Joyce Meyer. She's a wonderful motivational speaker full of advice on how to regain your emotions and your security. You're beautiful...now just BELIEVE it!

Answer 4

Hey!
I just wanted to tell you that sometimes we women can get really down on ourselves. But the first step is to start to do things for you, and not just to please your husband.
Gaining weight is hard, and I have been there myself.
It all depends on you and if you really want to change yourself for you and for your health.
I found a gym buddy, and we both work out together, and let me tell you it is one of the best things I have done for myself.
Also, could you work out with your husband when he is able?
The more you get active, the happier you will be. Trust me,
I am a reformed couch potato, I know.
But it something that you should really do for you. But whatever your motivation, you will start to feel so much better about yourself.
Please, please don't put yourself down anymore. Take it slow and just make small adjustments and slowly you will see that you will feel better about you.
Don't lose yourself, get busy doing things that interest you.
It isn't necessarily your weight, it is that you are so down on yourself. You need to start to see the beauty in you, and start to tell yourself only positive things.
Also, change one thing about yourself each month. Try a new haircut, or color. Go have some fun with a girlfriend or a sister. Better yet, go do something fun with your husband.
Be the change you wish to see. Ghandi said that, and he was so right on.
Good luck sweetie!

Answer 5

Just start and make a change or two to start getting trimmer and better. Talk to him about this also. If you just choose two things to start you on your way and stick to one of them when you see improvement you will start another change. Make it a habit to drink water when you go places and very rarely drink a soft drink. Maybe 1 a day. This will become a habit and not thought about then you add another healthy habit to change. Make it a habit to walk or exercise the same way everday and make it simple so that you will do it. When you are at home alone lay on the bed and do some streaches then lay on your back with your legs straight out pick them up straight and let them down and some variations so that you will work on your stomach muscles. Just get in the habit of doing some little things. Instead of lunch walk and eat a health bar for lunch.

Answer 6

check out flylady.net, learn to love yourself. Learn to love yourself as you are, then set goals for losing weight. It's hard, I know, I'm in same place, but we have to remember that it will be worth it in the end. Just walking 30 minutes a day as a start can help. It also is supposed to help you feel better with endorphin release from exercise. Don't let that Lazy Beast inside of you get the better of you.

Also, one way I gained confidence, this might sound weird, but I posted a pic of me, basically a face shot and went to Craiglist in another city/state and asked what men thought. I got many positive responses and it really boosted my confidence.

Answer 7

NOTHING is less attractive than insecurity. Ok, you have gained weight. Make yourself eat better, do your hair and make up. Wear nice clothes regardless of your size. Surround yourself with positive people. Find someone to work out with, or even walk with daily. If there is no one, then strap on an mp3 player with some up beat music and do it yourself. Once you see the pounds start to melt off, your confidence will increase. Good Luck!

Answer 8

this was on the tyra banks show, if you keep putting yourself down then what man wants to hang around someone who has low self esteem, you may drive him away. instead of just looking at yourself and feeling sorry, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. how do you expect to loose weight if you just complain about it. there are many way of loosing weight. go join a gym, watch what you eat, take a walk, buy a tred mill or an indoor bike, if you like to watch tv alot, then put the tred mill in fron to the tv and exercise while watching tv

Answer 9

Well if you are unhappy with yourself, do something about it. If you want to look better and lose weight, do it. Take care of yourself. You should feel good about yourself. Confidence is sexy. It doesn't matter your size, be happy. Negativity is a put off.

Answer 10

There are plenty of guys out there who love a big woman. Don't worry about it so much. Get your hair done, get some new clothes and if you got it then flaunt it! I am sure you are beautiful. You have to see that before anyone else can.