How can women empower themselves to move on from an abusive relationship?

Question

Emotional and psychological, manipulative

Answer 1

I was in such a marriage. I finally developed some self esteem and realized that I didn't deserve to be abused.

Step One: It's him, not you, and he'll never change.
Step Two: Talk to people who love you, they will support your progress! You may even be able to find CODA meetings in your area, those help a lot for empowerment.

In my case, my father (who was a very abusive man) told me that if I didn't leave him, that he never wanted to hear about him again. I thought to myself, if my dad being an abusive prick himself can say that I need to leave...then it must be worse than I think!

Answer 2

First off I would like to say, it's not all that easy to do. You can put it on paper and it may all sound great, but nobody knows what type of abuse you are going through, and just what the risk will be to try and leave.

2nd. As I stated the risk could be quite sevier or easy, only you know what type of a person you are with. He might just let you go without any confrontation, or he could really get physically abusive. Just be careful, and don't let anybody know when you will attempt to make this move.

3rd.It takes strength, and knowledge to get out of this type of a relationship. As I said earlier it is not easy. Since he is a manipulative type of a person, he will be so close to you your back will hurt because it will feel like he is hanging to you so close that you will hardly be able to breathe. Everything you do will have to be kept in the utmost secrecy, and plan every step of the way. This is to avoid and physical confrontation so that you will not be hurt by him.

4th. You will have to plan everything you do. From changing your job, to secretly save enough money so that you can get as far away from him as possible. When you move, make sure you select a place just the opposit of where he would think you would go. Find employment different from what you do now if you are employed. Look in the classified section for jobs, and homes or apartments that you can afford. Try and pay for an apartment before you get there so you have a place to go to. If it's not too far away, drive over to where it is, and open a checking/savings account under an assumed name. You can legally change your name at a court house prior to leaving for $25.00. Then obtain a driver's license under that changed name. Also apply for a social security card under the new name. You have to do all things when you know he is working, or definitely going to be late so that you don't get caught or found out making these changes.If you own your own vehicle make sure you are fueled to the brim. If you don't have a vehicle purchase a bus ticket as soon as you can and keep everything you have changed hidden in a secure place. I would suggest under the drawer in a dresser. You can tape an envelope on the underside of the drawer for safe keeping. Place everything in the envelope prior to leaving. One last thing, I suggest that you start placing some of your clothing in the trunk of your car, so that you don't wait for the last moment to pack, you will need that valuable time to get away. Lastly purchase duplicate cosmetics, shampoo, toothpaste, and other toiletries so that when he comes home and find you not there he will think you may have just stepped out for a few minutes. He won't realize you have left until he checks your closet for clothing. By that time you can be anywhere from 60 to 100 miles away, and on your way to total freedom.

I hope that this is what you wanted. I can honestly tell you if you do not tell anybody about what you are planning it is very doubtful if he finds you. He will be pi--ed, but after awhile I believe he will give up looking for you.
Best of Luck, and be careful. Don't let him find this answer. God Speed, Butchrgt

Answer 3

You have to leave the web of abuse and you need to gain your self esteem. Yu should never let anyone make you feel less than. I know it is hard but in the end you will feel better about moving on and you will in time have a healthy realtionship. You obviously need to work on yourself first before moving on. But know you are better and deserve better

Answer 4

how can a man empower themseelves to move on from an abusive relationships?

Answer 5

Yes, I do believe, but he has so many "control issues", that's what makes it hard. I M me if u wanna chat about this subject more in deepth. Thank you.

Answer 6

know your deserve better decide enough and do what is nessessary to make the change. Plan and then do it.