2007-12-13 11:09:33 · 15 answers · asked by sonyviki 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is an easy one. He's no longer attracted to you.
My 3 step plan:
*Lose some weight.
*Stop nagging (garbage, dishes, laundry, etc...)
*Oral
This isn't a one time thing. You'll have to keep up on these things and before you know it, his engine will be rev'ing for you again. :-)
2007-12-13 11:23:54 · answer #1 · answered by TheTotalStud_StudTotal 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
He requires stimulation... if you sit around waiting for him to make the move and you haven't gotten him turned on by acting sexy, he just isn't in the mood.
Most men, especially after 30-35 need something to get them jump started. They want sex, but if they have to do the work, it isn't going to happen. Porn is an easy way to get that stimulation without requiring him to initiate... the girls in the picture are getting HIM in the mood.
If you want him to want you more... you do the work... if you do it often enough, it will have a carry over effect and you will ahve to do less and less... otherwise, he will choose porn over you 100% of the time eventually...
Most men I know that look at porn are so sick and tired of having to approach their wives that they would rather have it cut off than have to do the work AGAIN... IF it was 50/50... maybe... bu that's if it was ALWAYS 50/50...
The other thing is that most men find women who only want sex once a week to be a turn-off because their libido is so low. Porn doesn't say no 90% of the time and NEVER asks to be put in the mood.
2007-12-13 12:03:40 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both need to sit down and talk seriously. This is a problem. I don't want to put any negative ideas in your head, but if he is not doing it with you, and is watching porn all the time, then what is he watching it for. If he has a low sex drive, porn would be the last thing on his mind since it is centered around sex.
2007-12-13 11:15:36 · answer #3 · answered by lwomar 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are wrong and there Is another woman involved, you should know about it. Maybe follow him yourself, or hire a detective for a couple of days first. If that comes up with nothing, then it could be a few other things. My sister had this problem some time back, it turned out, that he was having trouble "getting it up", so he preferred to get off alone where if he couldn't erect, then he wouldn't be embarrassed. Another possibility is that he is depressed, how are things at his job, how are things at home? Could anything be bothering him? That can make a man turn inward and not want contact from anyone. What it comes down to, is you needing to get him to sit down, get comfortable, maybe get him a cup of coffee, and say flat out "I feel responsible for your lack of interest in me, and I'd like to know what it is that makes you turn to porn instead. I will love you no matter what you say, but this needs to be corrected either way before it becomes a problem." That'll hit him, but said gently, will make him be honest with you. Good luck sweetie.
2016-05-23 10:57:40 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's a lazy man that seems to have lost interest in you and it's easier and more exciting for him to get off on these DVDs
How much you love him? Is he good in other regards?
If not, prepare to leave his butt and start seeing what else is out there.
If you do love him too much and he's got a lot of good qualities, seriously see how you've changed since the girl he first feel in love with and each day take efficient persistent realistic action to re-honor yourself, no excuses JUST DO IT!
If you haven't changed much, sit down and ask him why, but you have to create an atmosphere where he can be honest or you'll never get the truth.
*Consider marriage counseling if possible.
One thing you could do, especially if in shape (or get in shape) is join him, my girl used to get off watching me jack off to t porn and help me out. When a girl can get past that taboo and insecurity, AND IF A MAN IS WORTH SAVING (ENOUGH OTHER GOOD POINTS) then this can add spice.
Trouble is many girls blow up!
The truth is 99% of men fantasize. They can love a wife but as long as he doesn't act on it and you learn to let him channel that into your marriage *and you take care of yourself. Ooohhh boy! You can fantasize sometimes he's your man, sometimes he's the guy on the DVD sometimes your the actress or it's you. I know many women who think of Johnnny Depp, but they're over the cheating thing. The important thing is keep him happy and by cutting some slack so he don't do wandering or leave, unless he's crap all-around.
Now if he doesn't want any part of you, I'd be worried and mad and prepare to leave. At first, he might think this is a trick question.
2007-12-13 12:13:51 · answer #5 · answered by Jack Bent 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He watches porn and he has a low sex drive?
Not being a man I do not claim to know it all, but it does not makes sense to me, so before I say something stupid I shall live it to the men
2007-12-13 11:16:12 · answer #6 · answered by Loretta M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he watches porn, how can he have a low sex drive? All porn is sex. Something is wrong there. You two need to sit down and talk or seek counseling.
2007-12-13 12:02:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
There is definitely something wrong w/ that picture. If he can't perform w/ you sexually he shouldn't be watching porn. Porn is only acceptable as a way to enchance your sex life and as long as the other partner is being satisfied. Tell him he needs to put some of the energy that he uses into whacking off to porn into pleasing you.
2007-12-13 11:48:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Thanks 'Loretta' (above somewhere), I'll say something stupid!
Are you fat & ugly and nag your husband all day long? That would be the only reason he ain't 'getting it on' with you. If he has a low sex drive BUT still manages to watch a heap of porn there can only be something wrong with you!
Sort yourself out! Talk to the man, ask what he wants!
2007-12-13 11:20:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
maybe you cost too much. I'm not talking money, but time and effort. I see lots of women say that the husband needs to do more cleaning, cooking, flowers, dinners out, romance ...etc for them to be more open to sex. It could simply be that he doesn't think all the work is worth it. I could be wrong, but its an idea.
2007-12-13 11:41:39 · answer #10 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋