The baby came out in the toilet. She went to the ER - they told her everything came out but did no exam and then she went back to a party less than 45minute later. Later she had some cocktails and danced and look fine and happy also. Is this behavior normal or should I be worried. We really wanted a baby and tried for very long - she was worried that she could not have a child. She was 12 weeks or so pregnant. Some say maybe she was not really pregnant as we got engaged only after she announced being pregnant. I'm not sure what is going on. Could it be unreal? Ideas?
2007-12-13 09:42:15 · 39 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
no exam at hospital because the she said the dr saw the "baby" and it looked like the whole thing.
2007-12-13 09:44:56 · update #1
Sounds fishy, were you there? Usually they do something called a D&C and the ER would examine her and keep her there to watch for bleeding.
2007-12-13 09:46:25 · answer #1 · answered by lisa b 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is not normal at all! Some people would do that in order to get their mind off of it, but when they got back home, and settled down, it would hit them. If she doesn't show signs of a loss within a week, then it is likely that it never happened in the first place. With the two of you wanting a child so badly, it is definitely not normal. She would have been SOOOOO very upset about this. You should watch her behavior closely for the week after this. If there is no change in her at all, then you know that something is not right. The only thing I can think of is either it wasn't yours, it didn't happen, or she did not want the baby. Those would be about the only things that would make her not be upset and a wreck for a while. Especially with her saying it came out in the toilet and her seeing it. That would cause major emotional issues with a woman. Get something that proves she went to the ER. Ask her for handouts or paperwork where she was released. And yes, they would have given her these things if she was there so DO NOT let her tell you otherwise.
Ask her what it looked like. There is more than just a baby that would come out with a miscarriage, and she would be bleeding for a while afterwards. If she is not bleeding, then you know it is not true. And they would have done an exam or at least and x-ray to be certain that everything did come out bc it can set up infection very easily. Also, she would be on meds to help stop the bleeding or to close the cervix. This is something you should definitely check into. If she did trick you into proposing to her, then you should get rid of her. That shows mental instability in her.
2007-12-13 09:49:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds kinda fishy to me... I had to have an ultra sound at 9 weeks and the baby was only about an inch long. so I dont think the doctor would not do any type of exam saying that he saw the baby and it looked like all of it. I have never gone through the trama of a miscarriage, so i dont know how you feel physically or emotionally to go to a party the next night. I wouldnt think it is unheard of, due to different people handling things in their own way, but the story about not having any type of exam is a red flag to say something is up. I would start to ask her more questions about what the baby looked like and how they know it was all out.... plus from what i understand if you miscarry and everything doesnt come out you can end up with a type of infection....so why would a doc risk that??
Good Luck!
2007-12-13 10:12:14 · answer #3 · answered by legends_chick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, first of all, Im sorry to hear that bc you sound like if you grew attached to this baby, but unfortunately, I dont think that there was a baby at all, because when someone has a miscarriage, they have to be cleaned and scraped for anything that might be left in the uterus and that doesnt take 45 minutes. Also some doctors suggest that the mom goes to counseling. So even if she was pregnant, her behavior after she had a miscarriage was not motherlike. I would be shocked if I saw a tiny human in the toilet. Thats not normal.
2007-12-13 09:49:32 · answer #4 · answered by Is that your final answer? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For a minute i thought you were my boyfriend!....just cuz my story is so much the same
In the morning i was woken by a horrible cramp and a crazy amoutn of bleeding......went to ER and lost it there.
They didn't do an exam but the doctor said it 'sounds like' all the tissue came out and told me to be on my way. That day the cramps made me cry. Once the cramps stopped, the miscarriage was done, and i felt 100% better right away. I stayed home that night, but felt good enough to party!
2007-12-17 08:49:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she went in most likely they would do a check up on here to be sure it did all come out, and to make sure she was not bleeding to much which could be a sign that she would need a dnc, Now if she just called and talked to them like i did and told them she saw tissue and that she was not going through more then a pad an hour they may not of called her in for a check. And being 12 weeks there would be more tissue which would most likely cause more cramping, I dont see how she could feel like partying, and if she did really have a miscarriage and she was acting all happy,.. she may just be really sad about the whole ordeal and dont know how to deal with it except to drink and be around others. I feel sorry for men that have to put up with fakers
2007-12-13 09:54:08 · answer #6 · answered by me_myself 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The hospital would have examined her.
She could have a problem and not know it.
Did you ever go to a doctor appointment with her ?
An easy ER visit usually takes at least 6 hours. How long was this party ?
I doubt she was pregnant or went to the hospital.Why didn't you go with her?
A miscarriage takes days.Even after the embryo comes out, you bleed heavily for days longer.You may even require surgery.
She isn't telling you the truth.
2007-12-13 09:56:49 · answer #7 · answered by Cammie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She might not have been pregnant at all, but then again, people have different ways of showing their feelings. Maybe she just needed to take her mind off it. But my friend did go through one, and she had a really hard time. She was 3 or 4 months pregnant. I don't know if it is any worse or better, as to how far along you are. But I know even though I am not ready for a baby and even if i didn't want one, it would still be devastating to me to lose something so precious. And again people have different ways with coping. You can CHOOSE to have it naturally OR a D&C.
2007-12-13 09:49:43 · answer #8 · answered by N. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's odd that she never was examined. Especially since she went to the ER. She didn't follow up with her own doctor. Did you see the baby?
I don't think she was pregnant, but I can't be sure, it sounds like she wasn't...how could she go to a party right after having a miscarriage? I think if you never saw evidence of a pregnancy, i.e. went to an appointment, heard the heartbeat, then you better consider she may have lied to you.
2007-12-13 09:49:02 · answer #9 · answered by E.P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That doesn't seem normal
miscarriages are usually painful for the woman, and not to mention very emotionally traumatizing as well.
but physically it puts a strain on your body, and takes a little while to recover from. It seems strange that she was able to go to a party so soon after. But the only way to find out would be to have a doc examine her because they can tell for sure if she had really been pregnant.
2007-12-13 09:46:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. Well if she did lose the baby that might have been her way of coping with it. When I miscarried I couldnt leave the house for 3 days and couldnt stop crying. A friend of mine only grieved for 20 min after losing hers. So ppl react differently but wow I still cant believe she went to a party right after. It hurts to miscarry and there is so much blood that I sure wouldnt be dancing around.....
2007-12-13 09:46:29 · answer #11 · answered by Kel 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋