Whats the funniest bumper sticker u have seen?

Question

I saw two that i really liked! The one said: " Dont laugh its paid for" and the other was " When I grow up I want to be a cadillac" and it was on a beat up old VW.....sooooo funny!!!!

Answer 1

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I fish therefore I lie
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I Have The Body Of A God ... Buddha
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Chess players "mate" better
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Constipated People Don't Give A ****.
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That is so five minutes ago!!
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If you can read this, thank a teacher
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Don't mess with Texas
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I will mess with Texas
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Don't pray in my school and I won't think in your church
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If You Drink Don't Park, Accidents Cause People.
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Who Lit The Fuse On Your Tampon?
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If You Don't Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut.
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Please Tell Your Pants Its Not Polite To Point.
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If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe You Could Drive A Little Better.
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My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant.
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Thank You For Pot Smoking.
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To All You Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.
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If At First You Don't Succeed... Blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling.
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Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings".
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If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer.
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Horn Broken ... Watch For Finger
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It's Not How You Pick Your Nose, But Where You Put The Booger.
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If You're Not A Hemorrhoid, Get Off My ***.
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You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me
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The Earth Is Full - Go Home
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This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To Me
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So Many Pedestrians - So Little Time
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Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult
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If We Quit Voting Will They All Go Away?
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The Face Is Familiar But I Can't Quite Remember My Name
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Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway
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Illiterate? Write For Help
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Honk If Anything Falls Off
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Cover Me I'm Changing Lanes
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He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost But Miles From The Next Exit
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I Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits With An Unarmed Person
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You! Out Of The Gene Pool!
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I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To
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Where Are We Going And Why Am I In This Handbasket?
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If Sex Is A Pain In The ***, Then You're Doing It Wrong
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Fight Crime: Shoot Back!
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If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over... [Seen Upside Down On A Jeep]
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Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed For 35mph Are Also Timed For 70mph.
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Guys: No Shirt, No Service - Gals: No Shirt, No Charge
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If Walking Is So Good For You, Then Why Does My Mailman Look Like Jabba The Hut?
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Necrophilia: That Uncontrollable Urge To Crack Open A Cold One.
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Ax Me About Ebonics
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Body By Nautilus; Brain By Mattel
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Boldly Going Nowhere
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Cat: The Other White Meat
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Caution - Driver Legally Blonde
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Don't Be Sexist - Bitches Hate That
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Heart Attacks ... God's Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends.
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It'll be a great day when our schools get all the money they need and the air force has to hold a bake sale to buy a bomber
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Honk If You've Never Seen An Uzi Fired From A Car Window
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How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down Before He Admits He is lost
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If You Can't Dazzle Them With Brilliance, Riddle Them With Bullets.
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Money Isn't Everything, But It Sure Keeps The Kids In Touch
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Saw It ... Wanted It ... Had A Fit ... Got It!
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My Hockey Mom Can Beat Up Your Soccer Mom.
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GROW YOUR OWN DOPE --- PLANT A MAN.
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All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets.
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Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them
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I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
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WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
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BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
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o you're a feminist...Isn't that precious.
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I need someone really bad...Are you really bad?
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Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder


I poke badgers with spoons.

Be alert. The world needs more lerts.

Keep on working, millions on welfare depend on you!

Black holes are where God divided by zero.

Veni, Vidi, VD. I came, I saw, I cankered.

I didn't climb to the top of the food chain to become a vegetarian!

Alcohol and calculus don't mix. DON'T DRINK AND DERIVE!

Kids in the back seat cause accidents; Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

Money is the root of all evil. For more information, send $10 to me.

That's not a haircut, it's a cry for help.

If you observe this vehicle being operated in an unsafe manner, please try to think of it as one more anomoly in the cosmic order. (thanks to Clement Anthony)

If God is within, I hope he likes enchiladas!

So many stupid people, and so few asteroids.

Want a little taste of religion? Bite the minister.

I didn't believe in reincarnation in my last life, either!

Excess is never too much in moderation.

My mind is like a steel trap. Rusty and illegal in most states.

To err is human, to moo bovine.

Think globally, Act galactically.

My wife says I should get up and go to work, but the voices in my head say I should stay home and clean my guns.

If it's not one thing, it's your mother.

Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.

Don't believe everything you think.

Help your local Search & Rescue. Get lost!

Carpe Diem = Seize the day. Carp In Denim = Fish in pants.

Life is short. So buy the shoes!

Never believe generalizations.

The generation of random numbers is too important to leave to chance.

I don't think, therefore I am not.

Jesus saves. He uses double coupons.

Avoid alliterations always.

Fishermen don't die, they just smell that way. (thanks to CW)

Dyslexics are teople poo.

Jesus is coming. Look busy! (thanks to Buddy)

Say "NO" to drugs. That will bring the prices down.

What would Ashton do?

Jesus loves you. But I'm his favorite.

An Apple a day keeps Windows away.

This bumper sticker intentionally left blank.

When you do a good deed, get a receipt in case heaven is like the IRS.

What would Gandalf do?

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

Double your drive space. Delete Windows.

Does anal retentive have a hyphen?

If it ain't broke, take it apart and fix it.

Resistance is futile (if > 1 ohm).

My mother was a moonshiner, and I love her still.

MOP AND GLO - The floor wax used by Three Mile Island cleanup team.

I'm Canadian. It's like being American, but without the gun.

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.

The control key on the keyboard does not work.

The meek shall inherit the earth, after we're through with it.

Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!

Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.

Nuke the Whales! We'll hunt them at night.

Jesus loves you! Everybody else thinks you're a jerk.

Lawyers have feelings too (allegedly).

If there is no God, who always pops up that next Kleenex?

Too much Pluribus, not enough Unum.

Forget world peace; visualize using your turn signal.

What wouldn't Jesus do?

If you believe in telepathy, think about honking.

People like you are the reason people like me need medication.

Every time you open your mouth, some idiot starts talking.

The box said Windows 2000 or better. So I installed Linux.

Use the best: Linux for servers, Mac for graphics, Windows for Solitaire.

I found Jesus - he was behind the sofa all the time.

So many cats, so few recipes.

Save the trees, wipe your butt with an owl.

Don't make me mad. I'm running out of places to hide the bodies. (thanks to Brett)

I plan to live forever. So far, so good! (thanks to Jake M.)

Rock is dead. Long live paper and scissors.

Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.

Veni, Vidi, Velcro. I came, I saw, I stuck around. (thanks to Evets)

On the journey of life, I choose the psycho path.

On your mark, get set, go away!

What would Scooby do?

Honk if the twins fall out. (thanks to Will)

The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.

Sorry I missed church. I've been busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian. (thanks to Tananda)

Let's skip the insults and get right down to your butt kicking!

I don't have a beer gut, I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs.

My drinking team has a bowling problem. (thanks to Bromond)

Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.

I am not infantile, you stinky poopyhead.

I had the right to remain silent, but I didn't have the ability. (thanks to Kenneth Dockery)

If you can read this, you're not the president.

Answer 2

"conserve water. shower /w a friend"
"I'm not as think as you drunk i am ossifer
"only quitters go to rehab"
"Horn broken. watch for finger"
"he who laughs last thinks slowest"
think of anymore i'll edit :] by the way LOVE ur question!! lol how will u ever pick best answerrr? lol


EDIT!!!!
Chess players "mate" better
That is so five minutes ago!!
If you can read this, thank a teacher
If You Drink Don't Park, Accidents Cause People
If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe You Could Drive A Little Better.
If At First You Don't Succeed... Blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling.
You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me
This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To Me
So Many Pedestrians - So Little Time
Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult
The Face Is Familiar But I Can't Quite Remember My Name
Illiterate? Write For Help
Honk If Anything Falls Off
Cover Me I'm Changing Lanes
I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To
Where Are We Going And Why Am I In This Hand basket?
If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over... [Seen Upside Down On A Jeep]
Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed For 35mph Are Also Timed For 70mph.
Guys: No Shirt, No Service - Gals: No Shirt, No Charge
If Walking Is So Good For You, Then Why Does My Mailman Look Like Jabba The Hut?
Caution - Driver Legally Blonde
Don't Be Sexist - Bitches Hate That
It'll be a great day when our schools get all the money they need and the air force has to hold a bake sale to buy a bomber
How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down Before He Admits He is lost
Saw It ... Wanted It ... Had A Fit ... Got It!
My Hockey Mom Can Beat Up Your Soccer Mom.
GROW YOUR OWN DOPE --- PLANT A MAN.
All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets.
Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot the
Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.
Jesus loves you! Everybody else thinks you're a jerk.
If there is no God, who always pops up that next Kleenex?
Forget world peace; visualize using your turn signal.
If you believe in telepathy, think about honking.
Every time you open your mouth, some idiot starts talking.
Use the best: Linux for servers, Mac for graphics, Windows for Solitaire.
Rock is dead. Long live paper and scissors.
Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.
On the journey of life, I choose the psycho path.
On your mark, get set, go away!
What would Scooby do?
I don't have a beer gut, I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs.

Answer 3

I have the funniest one and its on my back bumper... "If you're going to ride my @ss at least pull my hair". Nothing better than watching a car with an old couple in it laugh their heads off, or jokingly start pulling on each others hair. I think a couple of cops have laughed too.

Answer 4

"Dude,Shut Up And Let Me Drive"

For Some Odd Reason That One Made My Laugh Like Hell.

it was Funny Because There Was A Picture Of A Cop Trying To Talk And There Was A Skater Dude Looking Bored

Answer 5

One that says,
"Out of a job yet? Keep buying foreign"
Not funny but very true!!!
The funny part about it was that it was on the bumper of a Toyota.

Answer 6

A bumper sticker that said "Bumper Sticker"

Answer 7

BUCK FUSH





down with the self appointed Yahoo Answer Cops

Answer 8

Here in Hawaii ours say, Slow down, this ain't the mainland.

Answer 9

Hell must be full they sent me back! Someone else told my other fave the one about riding my a$$ so pull my hair... bummer but it is cute! Have a great day!

Answer 10

The "Don't Taze Me Bro!" bumpersticker. I really laughed when I saw one on the freeway.