How do I get my Ex-wife back?

Question

My ex wife now and I were togather for 4 years, married 3 years have a 2 year old daughter and have been married and divorced twice in the period. Last divorce was Sept 20. We love each other still to this day, but she has pushed her self away from me and now she is dating a young man from her church about 2 months now. She actually went o phildephia with t meet some of his family. I think thats kinda quick to do that but supposably he asked her and she went. This is destroying me inside. She tells me its not like when me and her were togather, that its more of a friendship the relationshipwith him. I feel like I am really dieing inside and I would do anything to get her back and really work on our family. I mean we speak almost everyday at leat once and we have been intamite a few days ago, but she told me not to use that against her of she wants to go out with this other guy. I mean what should I do? I feel like im being taken advantage of. Do I have falso hopes? Do you honestly think its possible for us to get back togather again?

well we have been thorugh alot of stuff from a wedding disater to not closing on our 1st home in april of this year. She told me in auagust she doesnt think i will change and she that she cant do it anymore. We have been seperated before but it has been nothing like this. Its going on 3months now ans she is still being like this. She told me to wait until Jan 1st and maybe we can re unite and start fresh, but for me not to get my hopes up. So its like a 50/50 shot I guess. Its been to painful to wait so long so I aske her if she is not in love with mr anymore and that if we arent going to get back togather then let me know now instead of dragging it out until jan.1. She said if she said that, that she would be lying and that she needs time t think about this. Thats why she wants to wait till the 1st of jan. I guess somedays I think we will turn things around and other days i feel she is gone. When we see each other I have to iniciate the kiss other wise we wont kiss. im lost?

She sometimes calls me real late night crying and asking why this had to happen. I try to tell her we can work things out if we really try. She gets bad and sounds real bitter sometimes. Its hurts and other times she is nice. I dont know what to do to chnage her back to the nice person she was. I dont even think she really likes this other guy. Her dad thinks he is a good fit for her because he goes to her church and he seems to start going to school and doing something for himself. I have to degrees from college and am a good guy also. I dont know why we are here. I just needsome guidence in this tribulation in my life because one day I feel ok then the other I know she is probabky hangin with him and I feel sick to my stomach. I mean my daughter sees him more then she sees me now and thats killing me. She doesnt even reconize me anymore.

Answer 1

Is this your covenant spouse? If so, you should never have divorced her for God made marriage for life until death do you part.

You need to turn your life over to God. He will restore your marriage, but you have some serious work to do.

Please check out Bob and Charlyne Steinkamp. They have a restored marriage after being divorced for about two years. They have a website and send devotionals everyday encouraging men and women to stand for their marriage and their spouse's salvation. Check out their archives.
https://rejoiceministries.org/devotion.php

I highly recommend that you sign up for Doreen's Devotionals called Doreen's Daily Delights.. These are awesome. http://marriagerestorationministries.org/

Here's another website for people standing for their marriages. They have a men's forum where you can talk to other men standing for their marriages. There is chat every Friday night. http://www.faithandmarriage.com/

Check out Jimmy and Karen Evans. They have a weekly tv show that discusses marriage. Their shows are on the internet that you can watch. Jimmy is excellent. Jimmy gives very practical guides on how to have a successful marriage. http://www.marriagetoday.org/

Also check out this website for help http://www.godsavedmymarriage.com/

Check out this link concerning divorce and remarriage. I think you will be surprised. Many churches are blinded to the truth and even encourage people to divorce. Satan is tearing the church and marriages apart.
http://www.biblicalresearchreports.com/divorceandremarriage.php#hatedivorce

Answer 2

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Answer 3

You are not over reacting.. Although he has financial responsibility for his kids, it should remain just that. Of course the ex wife would probably want to have him back but talk to him frankly and tell him that you don't like it. Honesty is the best policy. If he truly cares for you, he wouldn't want to hurt you by communicating with his ex wife other than financial matters. Do you have an ex husband too? If you do, ask him how he would feel if you are doing the same thing?

Answer 4

KJ,
Together for 4 years, married for 3 years, 2 year old child, married and divorced twice, last divorce on Sep.20, talk every night, last sex just a few days ago and now want het back in life... hey.. what is this? Is life something like a game or what? If you keep on doing this marriage and divorce game with her, when will you two live? And what about that porr child? Why drag her through this predictable drama again and again? Dont you think you two are quite irresponsible to be like this if you talk every night, have sex when you feel like?
Come on.. take a call about this relation. Either you find whether she wants you and if yes, take her back and then never again separate. Whatever happens. If not, just leave her. Let her enjoy her freedom. Have sex with her if you want and if she is willing. Dont hang on to each other emotionally. Be friends and talk to each other if you want, but, restrict the relation to not to touch your hearts deeply.
But, remember she also needs a life. She may be trying to find it with the new guy, leave her to do that. Dont spoil her chnaces of making a good life. She has done enough for you. You too have done. I think it is better to move on.
Take care..

Answer 5

You've already been married twice and divorced twice with the same woman and now you're trying to make it a third. I can't believe how weird this is, especially with her being intimate with you. It's like you both have an unhealthy addiction to each other. Based on your crazy history, I think it's highly possible that the two of you WILL get together and do a third marriage, cause you're both nuts and quite frankly, she's probably bored with this normal guy. You can tell her I said that.

Answer 6

Hunny, she is stringing you along, cut the string. You need counseling you are in a never-ending relationship. she knows that when she is done with whatever shes doing you will be there. Then when you get back together everything is good until the issues arise again, then divorce, and doing your own thing then back together. Hunny you need to think about the kids and your own sanity. My heart goes out to you. Good Luck

Answer 7

You need to deal with your denial, this relationship is over in the married sense. This will take time. You need to detach, and set some boundaries for yourself. Stay involved with your child, but not with your X. Its OK to be friendly but like I said set some boundaries. She will respect you and appreciate you more in the end.

Answer 8

Do you have false hopes? Are you kidding? Taken advantage of? She wanted sex. You wanted sex. You got sex. She doesn't want you dude. You are handy when she needs some but that's about it. Why put yourself through all this. Move on. Wish her well and head into the sunset. Don't look back.

Answer 9

Yes, she's leading you on and no, you won't be getting back togather. Move on, don't allow her to string you along like that!

Answer 10

Hard to say. Why are you breaking up in the first place?