mens abortion rights?

Question

this is another two part question, both are realative to the topic, but are seperate questions.

my first one is, should men have a say in abortion? i'm figuring most of you will say no, but i'm interested to see if someone thinks men should have some part of this process/decision.

my second part is, would you find it reasonable for a legal agreement on responsiblity? women have the right to alleviate any responsibility for taking care of a child by getting an abortion(in general). a guy has no voice in the matter. this hurts men in two ways. one, is if the guy wants and is willing to take care of the child on his own. maybe rare, but it happens. but number two is what really bothers me. if a women chooses to keep the baby, despite the fact that he doesn't want the child, he is forced to take responsiblity for it. this goes back to the question, should there be a contract, for a guy to "abort" his rights as a father. this means no visitation, no child support, nothing.

to me it seems wrong to say i'm responsible for bring a child into the world, but yet i have no choice.

so let me know what you think.

in response to an anwswer, the point i'm getting at with the second question is,

why am i responsible after the child is born, but not before? it's not my fault you have to carry the child. despite what you women think, us men are not gods, we did not create nor design you. we have to go through life with one of our most sensative parts dangling outside of us for the elements of the world to strike. if it were up to me, they would be inside where they could be protected. you can't start blaming us for the way anybody is created. that is nature, not men. second of all, it takes two. you always seem to forget that.

Answer 1

i understand to an extent the questions you are asking yourself - and i would wager other men have wondered the same kinds of things.

it is reasonable to figure that when a guy gets a girl pregnant that he may really want her to carry the fetus to term and give birth because he really wants a child. he may even be willing to take full responsibility for raising the child without any role or support from the mother. this is something that the couple can arrange for.

ultimately - while it may seem unfair that you don't get to determine whether or not someone you impregnanted keeps a pregnancy or not, you need to accept it as it is.

ideally, the two people talk it over and can mutually agree on what will happen next. abortion or no abortion. the guy may really want her to abort the fetus, but she gets to decide whether or not to have that medical procedure done. because right or wrong in your opinion - she is the one who has to grow the cells into a baby and then deliver it, and then be a mother. huge responsibility. and 9 months is a long time.

until men can start carrying children, this is how it is. for a long time, men DID in fact make many decisions for women, limiting their autonomy and their rights as independent human beings. to this day, sexism is a very real issue.

Answer 2

I see where you're coming from and I reckon it's a good point and unfortunately not discussed enough. While we we have to accept that women probably should have the last say in a situation, who can deny that the baby belongs to the father just as much as the mother? I don't think there's any fairness in saying a guy can 'abort' his responsibilities as a dad. If a guy has unprotected sex, he has to be held responsible.
But I do think that if a woman wants to have an abortion it's plain wrong to disregard the father's wishes. At the end of the day the couple should come to a decision that is the best for the child.

Answer 3

I do not even know where to begin...this is a great question and I don't really have an answer, but I do know that there are many many single mothers who do not get help from the fathers and even if they do get financial help sometimes the parenting help is not available.
If a woman aborts a child the child is gone and suffers no consequence. If a man gets a woman pregnant and ignores all responsibility the child is the one who suffers. I have a feeling that if there was a legal process for men to ignore responsibility, some men would just love it too much and that would be harmful to society.
I don't know man, this is just one of the few things where women have the upper hand.
Don't you just wish there was male birth control?

Oh wait there is its called condoms!!!! Don't leave home without them. although I got pregnant even with a condom, so I guess men who don't want to be responsible adults should not have sex ,bottem line.

Answer 4

Answer to first question:
1. You aren't the one pregnant so why should you get a say if the person that is pregnant should have to carry around a child for 9 months? If the woman is against getting an abortion, why should the person not pregnant have any ability to coerce the person into an abortion.

2. I think there are more guys that would want to have the kid than you seem to think. But even so, if a guy wants to get out of responsibility, then he shouldn't be so careless about his sexual activity. If you don't want to pay child support, don't do things that increase your chances of getting someone pregnant. The reason a guy doesn't get to opt out of paying child support is because states have the public policy that a child deserves to have two parents supporting him or her. Just because YOU don't want the child doesn't mean the child should not be allowed to be born, but you are half responsible for that child ever being born. I am sure if you wanted the child and she didn't and she brought the child to term and you got custody you'd expect her to pay child support (and you'd be entitled to it)

To avoid this problem you could make sure that the person you are having sex with would be willing to abort the fetus if you got her pregnant first...

Answer 5

You do have a choice. If you don't want a child,your choices are..don't have sex,wear a condom or get a vasectomy. If you choose not to follow any of these,then you shouldn't be able to opt out of your responsibility. It takes two to make a baby and two are needed to support it.
As far as a mans choice about abortion. I do feel bad for men who don't want their child aborted. I have a friend who's GF aborted their child years ago. He has never gotten over it. He truly wanted that child. But,the ways our laws are now,it is still the woman's decision.

Answer 6

I do not believe that men should have any say, whatsoever, in whether or not a woman has an abortion. It's their bodies, not ours. The most moral thing we can do is ensure that it remains a safe and legal option.

As for responsibility; guys do tend to get screwed when it comes to child support and things like that - I do support the idea of a man being able to opt out of parental rights.

Answer 7

If you become pregnant, then you should have the choice and not the person that you may not like that impregnated you. Otherwise, it is not your body that is pregnant and it is not your choice. I know of many men that would drug a woman, get her pregnant and force her to have a child. I believe it is best for society not to set up a system that would make a framework like that available.

Answer 8

No, a man should not have any say in this matter because otherwise he would decide matters related to the health of the woman. Suppose the woman's health is in danger. The man doesn't believe his wife and hires "doctors" who would say what he wants to hear. In the end, he can legally force the woman to cause harm to her health. That wouldn't be fair.

Answer 9

You should not have a had casual sex, Joshua.
If you are right, every man out there who has to pay child support would use your argument.

Answer 10

The man isn't the one sacrificing his body to have the child.