Did any man here ever live with a feminist?

Question

Did their issue have any affect on you? How do you feel about their politics and philosophy? Did it cause a drift in you relationship? Did you need to change certain ideologies to maintain the relationship? Thanks.

Answer 1

Ok.

I'll be serious for a moment.

Yeah. I did. My first wife. At the time I guess I wouldn't have agreed with her politics and philosophy, if I had any internal, non hormonally driven directives of my own. And even if I had, I still would have been too distracted by her eyes to mention them. Blue. Piercing. Even a tad scary. She had a way of looking into me, even through me. When she did, I didn't give a damn about her often angry, contentious, in-yer-face agenda. I could see through her, too. I pegged her as a really soft, intelligent and decent person. One that I thought I could love, or could manipulate and take advantage of. Then and now, I'm not sure which it was.

Six years older than me, and I'm probably twice as old as most of the people that post here. In on the ground floor of the movement. Baggy jeans, no makeup, hairy armpits, passionately devoted to what was then a genuine and legitimate cause. But she had a great body and a terrific mind, and all her efforts to ugly both of them up for the good of the cause were ineffective, at least in my eyes.

And, no, I didn't have to change any of my views or anything else to have her, it was enough to be guileless. She'd had enough of phonies willing to tote signs in a lesbo march to get in her pants. I guess she found it refreshing to take up with a barely out of college, borderline psychotic spunk bucket that somehow had learned to cook like a chef and would tell her flat out over dinner that she had a great a*ss, fully expecting her to throw a scallop shell full of oysters Rockefeller into his face.

She was attracted to me because I was wild, and I to her for the same reason. I let it go at that. With a vengeance.

What we were wild about was of no importance. That we were passionate about it was enough. She wanted to better the world. I wanted to destroy myself with short term gratification, primarily sex and drugs and fights and being at home in court and in jail and managing to make myself and everybody else laugh about it. Can't say I managed all of it, but I could make HER laugh, even when I was ridiculing everything she cared about.

But she did care about me, and still does. About me and the world. She's taken a lot of foolish turns along the way, perhaps the most foolish of which was living with me and my peculiar brand of madness for 18 years. She has long since abandoned her activist notions. But she's still my best friend, and has somehow managed to forgive me for behavior I still can't forgive myself for, for cheating on her, for maxing out her forgiveness reserves, for finally making her face that she COULDN'T save me from myself.

But she was the ONLY person sitting around in the hospital when (eight years after we were divorced, two years after my second wife left me, who I had an affair with while I was still married to her) I woke up after nearly five hours of surgery needed after I suffered multiple gunshot wounds. Nobody in my immediate family gave a rat's a*ss. They ARE burned out on my particular brand of madness.

Maybe she's just a masochist. Maybe not. But I owe her more than I could possibly cover in a few paragraphs here, and she's far too complicated to describe in the same.

Things aren't always what they seem. We all would do well to consider that before we write off people that don't seem to be what we seem to think they ought to be or what we seem to want.

I pretty sure I'm not sorry I did. Or didn't. Or something. She's not sorry that she didn't, or did, or something. But sometimes I'm sorry I put her through having to know me, but I'm never sorry I knew her or know her.

Merry Whatever everybody. Go figger.

Answer 2

My ex wife had almost all the belifs of a radical feminist except she was very pro life and anti-homosexual marriage. She was a real nut job. Not saying that all feminist are nut jobs, but my wife did take the cake when it came to lunacy.
She would get pissed at me when I did guy things or had regular guy interests.
Although I stood up for my own beliefs and never backed down from an ideollogical challange it was impossible to win because she was so far into her wacko ideas there was no convincing her otherwise. Me being the kind to not role over just caused more chaos and arguing.
It affected me because now I absolutley cannot stand to argue with someone I am involved with. I will not. I have had a life time of arguing in just three short years.

Answer 3

So what you are asking is "have any men ever lived with a woman who considered herself an equally valid human being?" Ummm....hopefully most people. If you move in with a feminist you will have a problem if you refuse to acknowledge this validity. It is also a problem when you dump domestic chores on them like making dinner, doing laundry and picking up your dirty clothes. I can say, as a feminist, that living with a man who thought I should do all of these chores and then considered them of no value ended our relationship. The answer is that if you do not respect her as a valid human being and expect her to behave like a mother and maid in one, then you will have a problem.

Answer 4

My late wife was a self-described "feminazi" (although she wasn't really all THAT radical), but it didn't really cause any problems, since I'd been pro-feminism for a long while. I think the philosophy can take a little getting used to for some people, since the most radical of them aren't really after equality, but more like reparations for the wrongs committed against women over the centuries, as if those wrongs were committed against them personally. However, on the whole, I find moderate feminists to be a refreshingly forthright, interested in getting what they deserve - and no more. They don't want to be given a free ride, just fair treatment.

Answer 5

Yes.

I tossed her out after one year and had her charged with
Crimes Against Masculinity.

She is due to get released in only another 25 years.

Answer 6

No, and if you're talking about a radical feminist, I'd rather live in my mother's basement.

Answer 7

Besides my mother, her several girlfriends, defacto wife, best friend and various fellow nursing students, I have been surrounded by feminists all my life. I work with them, associate with them, campaign with them and actively support them. "We" (feminists) get along just fine, thank you very much!

Answer 8

My father and me,he was married to one.And an activist one too mother used to be.

Yes.
Admiration.
No,just sores every now and then.
No,mother wanted us "no puzzies"but up to her challenges.
She discriminated though.
Father still married,me I got "my liberation".
Love the bisht

Answer 9

No Men in their right mind would want to live with a feminist.

Answer 10

no, i would rather be sleeping on the park bench....