We have been married for 3 months & i was 5 months pregnant when we got married.. From the beginning of this pregnancy i have no sex drive whatsoever.. & even though he asks for it EVERY SINGLE DAY i just can't.. It's painful & uncomfortable & the thought of it sickens me..
We had an amazing sex life before i got pregnant.. Do you think it will go back to normal after our son is born?? I really miss sex... but when we try it just hurts so bad!!!
2007-12-12 13:30:55 · 19 answers · asked by ˚despeяate housewife˚ 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
talk t you doctor about the pain and ill feelings. however this is late in the pregnancy now ....your sex drive should return with a vengeance
2007-12-12 13:35:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
This is normal. A lot of woman have this same experience. Some woman are sexually active almost until the time of delivery. Everyone is different. Your body has gone through a lot of changes, obviously. Even if you had a strong sex drive now, the physical part would be difficult. A woman's sex drive and fun return some time after the baby is born. A lot do not wait that 6 week period after the birth.
If you have not already, you might want to try different positions, you on top, on the side, etc. There are a number of good sites (non -porn) you can read. Just search for "sex during pregnancy".
You may still not want to have sex, that is up to you. I sure someone has told you that there are other things than sex. That's true. But it still a lot of fun when you are ready.
2007-12-12 13:55:18 · answer #2 · answered by hamrrfan 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What is so sicking about making love to your husband while carrying his child? Making love is a beautiful thing, especially to someone that you love. Give your husband a break, he wants to have sex, and you miss it...have sex.
I couldn't get enough sex, pregnant or not. And now my son is 4 weeks old, and we can't have sex. Anal sex is not making love. Foreplay, oral, nothing gives me that same feeling as vaginal sex. Seriously, I would give anything to be able to make love to my husband right now. I MISS sex, I miss the frequency, the passion, the intensity....I miss it all. I envy you, I am jealous of you. The one thing that I want, I can't even have! Count yourself very lucky...make love to the man that loves you. And make love as much as you can because we have gone for a month without it, and it has really toned our intimacy down.
My son sleeps really well, my son is an amazing baby. He is the baby every parent wants...but we can't have sex. We have everything else, just not the sex. Ahhh, this is the hardest thing to get through. Hell I would rather be having the most insane fight ever right now and still be able to make love after.
And it did hurt to make love, more so in the last 4 weeks. I was in pain all the time, there wasn't much room in there, there was a lot of pressure, I had to pee all the time, but we made love, pain or no pain. I couldn't grasp the idea of not doing it...now we can't and I hate it with a passion. We had have always had a VERY healthy sex LIFE, and its been a month. Please, a month is insane for us. Absolultey would have been unheard of, if I just hadn't had a baby.
Anyways, make love to your husband. Once that baby comes, there will be NO sex LIFE for 6 weeks. Think about that. I didn't that much and now I am going crazy for it. I didn't once think about the " possible " 6 weeks post partum and now it makes me want to cry that I can't. Sorry, I have a very high sex drive. I would be doing it now, except I tore and am still bleeding...apparently a big no no. But sometimes I want to not care about the healing period and jump my husbands bones in a heartbeat.
Satisfy him in other ways and make sure he gets off. That way if it really does hurt too much, then he is still kind of getting what he wants.
2007-12-12 15:48:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sure it makes your husband feel rejected, and I just want to add that spicing it up a little doesn't have to be about sex. At least not traditional sex. Why don't you help your husband feel accepted by asking him what else you could do to be more intimate with him. I realize you are pregnant, but he has needs that he wants to share with you. Being married is something for the two of you-- but with a baby right around the corner, it will never be the 2 of you again-- help him feel secure in your marriage. Becoming a husband is a big step, immediately becoming a new dad is HUGE!
2007-12-12 13:53:20 · answer #4 · answered by SWEETYPI 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are other ways for you to pleasure each other without actual penetration. Since most women have clitoral orgasms, you might find something better than just intercourse. I know you're self-conscious at this point in your pregnancy, but try not to be. Your sex drive will return. Remember, though, you will have a new baby and will be tired, so don't put too much pressure on yourself. In the mean-time try to understand your husband has needs. It's hard for us to relate to but it's an actual physical need for him. Help him out as best you can.
2007-12-12 13:45:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have 3 kids. Let me just say I feel your husbands pain. My wife was the same way. When you get into your third trimester alot of things are going on with the baby that cause you to be uncomfortable especially penetration. Communication is the most important thing. You should get creative. It might surprise you how responsive he is. Once the baby comes and 6 weeks pass, you will see it was only temporary.
2007-12-12 13:50:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
All women have different responses to sex during pregnancy and you are no different; yours is a perfectly normal reaction.
If you’re really worried and this issue and it is causing problems in your marriage, see your gynaecologist for a physical check up, and if you feel that it’s more of mental block around sex at this time, a psychotherapist. If nothing is wrong in both those department, then your husband is just going to have to like it or lump it.
2007-12-12 13:56:34 · answer #7 · answered by Trajan 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it is hurting then you should talk to your doctor... Sex during pregnancy doesn't hurt most women.
I don't think it's bad at all - you're pregnant for crying outloud. Don't feel pressured to have sex when you're not up to it. I am sure that it will all go back to normal once your son is born.
Good luck! :)
2007-12-12 13:48:14 · answer #8 · answered by BTB{06.22.09} 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yea its a problem, he's about to explode with desire to touch you and your telling him it makes you sick and hurts. Go to the doctor!!! Have him check you out physically, chemically and start working out. If the doctor says your fine, go to another one if she says your fine. Search your self, be honest with your self. I know a few guys on blood pressure medicine a few others that just have no desire and don't know why. But they all finger and eat their wives regularly, some even use dildo's on them. Why aren't you willing to ease the craving a couple of times a week while you figure out what's wrong. Or is it simply you got what you wanted from him and now want him to leave and make payments? Love's a funny thing and want is another. Sorry to sound mean but I don't understand how we can say I love you and then not want to help each other. If he mistreats you or is mean I apologize sit on it, work out get supper gorgeous use him until you find someone else to love that will take care of you and you would take care of them no matter what. I don't mean grumpy cause he's horny, imagine coming home starving and someone waging a cheeseburger in your face with all the trimmings and saying no this one not for you, grumpy's understandable, even mad with a little yelling.
2007-12-12 13:49:38 · answer #9 · answered by Jay 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Since you seem iterested in it still than you probably will go back to normal afterwards. You should probably talk to your doctor about why it would hurt so bad. I've had three babies, and had sex the whole way through without it hurting. Sounds kinda wierd..have you tried different positions?
2007-12-12 13:36:47 · answer #10 · answered by crzyldy3 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It might...it also might be something you need to take up with your doctor....there could be a physical reason that needs to be addressed....although I have to say, having an infant around is not exactly romantic! It might take another five months or so after the birth for you to really get your sex drive back, but remember, sometimes we need to do it just because we love our spouse and acknowledge their needs as important.
2007-12-12 13:36:07 · answer #11 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋