Any ideas? Gift Ideas? Things I could do?
I was thinking of creating part of a scrapbook with inspirational thoughts and lyrics....and leaving room for her to finish the rest.....
HELP!!!
2007-12-12 11:16:59 · 33 answers · asked by danae_rachelle 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
If it just happened, then it's too soon to do stuff like that. Just be there for her, and let her cry on your shoulder. Gifts or scrapbooks will only make it worse right now.
2007-12-12 11:20:28 · answer #1 · answered by Joie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My best friend's boyfriend killed himself and that was a very rough year for everyone in both his and her life. Watching someone go through that much pain is so hard. I know this may not help, but the best thing you could probably do is just be there for her whenever she needs anything. She's not going to want to talk about it all the time but when she does, be ready to listen and be a shoulder to cry on. The scrapbook idea is a great idea though.
2007-12-12 11:21:28 · answer #2 · answered by superintense 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The scrapbook sounds nice. Just make sure you're there for her when she really needs you. At first you have lots of people around you and then suddenly they all disappear and you feel like nobody cares. Be there for her after everyone else goes back to their own lifes. She'll really need someone then.
Get her out of the house and doing things when she feels up to it. Because just sitting home and thinking is the worst thing you can let her do. Give her space but always be there when she needs friendship and understanding.
2007-12-12 11:31:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send her a nice card with a personal message, and make sure you call her or be with her as much as she needs (and you have time for). It's funny how people don't seem to realize who is around them at their time of need, but that's because they are in shock, not because they don't need you there. Listening to her, hugging her, keeping tissues handy, just do whatever she needs. One friend of mine used to bake people their favorite cookies when the were having a bad time. That sounds silly, until you are the one up alone and crying at 3:00 a.m., then your favorite cookies can seem like they fell from heaven.
Sometimes all you can do is be there and let her know you care. If she need help making arrangements or having people over after the funeral, or going to his family's afterward, she'll probably need someone who is there just for her. His family will be grieving, too, so they might not be able to comfort her like her own friend would.
2007-12-12 11:30:39 · answer #4 · answered by lisawithcats 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would hold create the scrapbook but don't give it to her now. Our best advice is to be there for her as much as you can... if she ask for you to leave, just let her know that she can call you when she wants. Sometimes space is better to heal and cry as much as possible. This has to be very difficult and painful for her to loose someone so special. Songs and photos will just bring more tears and pain by some comfort... later. As far as a gift, buy her a teddy bear and dress him in something that her boyfriend wore, also dab on some of his cologne. When you offer her the gift, tell her that you know that (name) is no longer with us, but he is with us in spirit and he still lives in her heart. Tell her to light a candle and pray and hold that Teddy bear near her and she will feel his presence. She will appreciate the thought and always love you for such thoughtfulness.
God Bless and my condolences to your dear friend.
2007-12-12 11:23:39 · answer #5 · answered by Sassy Shut Your Mouth 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice thought with the scrapbook. Just be there for her and let her lead you in how she's feeling. Everyone is different. But the best advice is let her know your there for her and most people dont give a gift but give something in loving memory.
2007-12-12 11:22:18 · answer #6 · answered by MikeyintheOC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The scrapbook idea is nice. Just give her some space to feel what she wants to feel and express that. She may not be ready to look through the book or do anything with it so don't get your feelings hurt if she doesn't, but it's a very nice gesture and may help her when she is ready.
2007-12-12 11:20:48 · answer #7 · answered by Deanrijo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say its more the action that counts at this stage, like being there for her, doing things to help her out, giving her time where necessary.
Its a good idea with the inspirational stuff, maybe in time. Nothing too sob-story with the lyrics, it might bring her down even more.
2007-12-12 11:20:00 · answer #8 · answered by lojix 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
your scrapbook idea is great but dont do it so soon. my sister passed away a couple months ago unexpectedly and my cousin made a scrapbook for me.. i sat down almost everynight crying myself to sleep with it.. i now still look at it almost everyday but right away it was really difficult. so my advise to you is yes do the scrapbook but wait a while to give it to her.. when is isnt in such shoke and emotional.. granted she will be for a while but even a couple of weeks later will be easier for her..until then be there for her.. and let her know she can call you anytime.. (there have been tons of freinds i call at 3-4am just to talk) be that person for her..
2007-12-12 11:22:44 · answer #9 · answered by silver14g 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The scrapbook idea with inspirational thoughts and lyrics is an awesome contribution to someones memory.
Your definitely someones good friend.
2007-12-12 11:20:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋