Afraid of getting married?

Question

I am 16 years old and a little over 2 months away from my wedding. I have known my fiance for 16 years and will be 17 in january (2 weeks before my wedding) but i am SOOOO afraid of getting married at this age becuase of how high the divorce rate is, I dont want to lose him at all..I have talked this through with my parents millions of times...which is why im even engaged now (they just helped me come up with my answer, they didnt tell me to get engaged) What should I do to become less afraid...any tips on keeping a marriage happy? Is our wedding a little too soon?(we have been engaged for a year..well will be a year christmas eve). I have talked this all out with my parents and they say they are concenting to the wedding because they know i love him and they love him too...heck they have known him longer than theyve known me..haha. But what are your suggestions?

i actually met him the day i was born

im not sugarcoating anything, my parents are concenting to it, I am still in school and will stay in school until i graduate, im not stupid! Dont go on things you dont know. Ive been through more crap the first 12 years of my life than most people will their entire lives. Ive been on drugs, but i wisened up and quit thanks to my fiance, i was abused but i was able to get away from it thanks to my fiances family...Im more mature than you all like to think, why is it people underestimate someone just because of their age? its just a number, a number means nothing when it comes to intellegence and maturity, so im JUST learning to drive, so, some people never learn to drive, my grandmother died without ever getting her license or learning how to drive. my age is a number, it tells you nothing about me

my reasons to get married are because I love him, I cant picture myself with anyone but him....belive me, ive spent hours on end thinking about this whole situation, trying to see myself with other people and it just doesnt feel right to me. ive done wayyyyy more thinking than you people seem to believe ive done, ive spent days...weeks thinking about it. the more i think about it the more happy i am that I had said yes to him, the main reason im so afraid is because of the divorce rate being so increadibly high.

Answer 1

I guess my only question is why the rush to get married? Why not finish school, and go to college first? Your right to be concerned. The divorce rate is high. but even higher for teens. It may work out for you, it may not. That all depends on the two of you and how you handle conflict. It's easy to stay married when times are good, but sometimes near impossible when things are tough.....Communication is the fist step, and that includes talking to each other and LISTENING. That is the part a lot of people skip. You can talk until you are blue in the face, but if you aren't hearing each other it's all for nothing. Know you will have days when you wonder why you wanted to get married in the first place. You seem level headed, but you are still very young. I just hope you are marrying him for the right reasons, and not to escape something. It also sounds like he is a lot older than you are. That is also something to consider....

Answer 2

What's the rush to get married at such a young age? I'm not sure why you're so bent on getting married right here, right now. You might have your reasons, but you haven't listed them here. One way to become "less afraid" is to become more confident in your decisions. Without confidence, you will be afraid of many things. The way most people acquire this confidence is through life experience on the one hand, and self-reflection on the other. You are too young to have had an opportunity for either - give yourself time, don't rush. If this relationship gonna fall apart, it's going to happen with or without a ring on your finger. You're not gaining much by rushing into marriage at such a young age.

Answer 3

I think you guys are too young. You should stay in a relationship but not make such a huge commitment so soon. My mom and dad got married really young and they found out that they were too immature and young to marry. They got divorced and if they would have waited longer to marry than maybe they would still be together.

Answer 4

Why get married so young? You don't have to be married to love him. I would advise anyone your age to not get married. You don't know everything about yourself yet, let alone knowing someone else that well. (you may think you do, but you don't)

I would postpone the wedding (not cancel it) indefinitely. If you are afraid now, it can tear a marriage apart later, even if you both love each other.

Answer 5

You have to be kidding right? how can you be ready for marriage when $hit you both just learned to drive pretty much? i also find it hard to belive that your parents are concenting to this, stop sugarcoating it and get your butt back in school and at least make it to 18 first. your not mentally ready or responcible enough to handle marriage and neither is he.

Answer 6

16 years old? Are you kidding? You ARE too young to get married. My daughter is 16 and she is not old enough or mature enough for marriage. She likes going out and having fun with her friends. She will be going to college next year. 16 is too young.

Answer 7

My suggestion is that you wait!! Why rush into things? YOU ARE 16!!! Be with him, continue to date him and love him, but hold off on the wedding. At least make it to 18 first!

Answer 8

16 is way to young!! You need to experience diff things with diff. people to know this is the one for you!!! Id wait a few years.

Answer 9

He sounds like a nice boy for your first hubby..

Best Wishes

Answer 10

my only thought is you are so young....you havent experienced anything ...but on the other hand everyone is a little nervous .marriage is a big deal...just fallow your heart