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this person needs your advice,both of them had a test before their wedding,she is confused,she is in love.............she is thinking of leaving that guy,is that the next thing to do.

2007-12-12 03:08:57 · 18 answers · asked by oginnik 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

18 answers

is it possible? Yes.
Is it wise? NO! Not without serious protection. One error could be fatal.

If she's married to him, i can't imagine her pain and confusion, not to mention fear.
Her husband must be hurting as well, expecially if he had no idea.

This is truly sad.

2007-12-12 03:19:00 · answer #1 · answered by FlyingScooter 6 · 2 0

First of all, HIV can take time to come up on a test. You can test one month, test three months later and come up positive. HIV can take up to seven years to present itself. Secondly, having HIV does not necessarily mean that you will contract AIDS. People infected with HIV live long, full lives with the right meds and care. Quit insinuating that someone had to be cheating and sowing seeds of doubt within this marriage when the husband could have contracted this disease before he met his wife. Having HIV doesn't mean he's had gay sex either. No offense against gays intended. I wanted to put that in for those that have decided to make rude comments concerning that issue.

As for having sex, yes they can have sex but they will have to use safe sex practices ie. using condoms. They will probably be unable to conceive without infecting the wife or the baby. I wish this couple good luck. HIV is a hard disease to live with and I am amazed at how much misinformation and ignorance still exists regarding HIV and AIDS.

P.S. This was written with "Steve is cool" in mind. Most of the answers were great and showed great empathy. Steve's answer is not so cool.

2007-12-12 07:12:36 · answer #2 · answered by blondspitfire 3 · 0 0

The best thing to do would be to speak to a doctor about what precautions to take during sex. Often HIV doesn't show up in a blood test for more than 6 months. It is possible he had it from a previous relationship and knew nothing about it. Tell her not to give up, there are alternatives.

2007-12-12 11:07:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

this is really bad! if they did not have protected sex she could very well get HIV or aids!! why would anyone have sex with someone when they have this deadly disease!!!! there is no cure!!! people may live longer but they will all die and they are all capable of spreading this tragic illness to anyone else around them!!! those are the facts.she must be retested especially if there was ever any unprotected sex at all.the HIV virus can lay dormant for years and she could spread it by being a carrier!! how tragic for both of them!!!yes she should leave get tested and counseling! good luck!

2007-12-12 03:25:11 · answer #4 · answered by dixie58 7 · 1 0

initially, HIV can take time to return up on a attempt. you could attempt one month, attempt 3 months later and are available up effective. HIV can take in to seven years to contemporary itself. Secondly, having HIV would not unavoidably advise which you will settlement AIDS. human beings contaminated with HIV stay long, finished lives with the appropriate meds and care. supply up insinuating that somebody had to be cheating and sowing seeds of doubt interior of this marriage whilst the husband could are growing to be smaller this ailment till now he met his spouse. Having HIV would not advise he's had gay intercourse the two. No offense against gays meant. i needed to place that throughout for persons that have desperate to make rude comments touching directly to that concern. As for having intercourse, particular they are able to have intercourse yet they'll ought to apply risk-free intercourse practices ie. making use of condoms. they'll in all probability be unable to conceive without infecting the spouse or the toddler. I desire this couple good success. HIV is a not uncomplicated ailment to stay with and that i'm surprised at how lots incorrect information and lack of information nevertheless exists touching directly to HIV and AIDS. P.S. This became written with "Steve is cool" in innovations. most of the solutions have been great and confirmed great empathy. Steve's answer isn't so cool.

2016-11-03 00:36:06 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

well, if she wants to have kids with someone then she needs to leave him. She may need to test herself again...the story here is not adding up. Were they having sex before the wedding? and was the husband negative before the wedding? She may have it already but has not being picked up by the tests yet. She does need to leave him if she wants areal future but must test herself again in 3 months

2007-12-12 03:15:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Wow, that is a really rough situation. I would post this in the Medical section to get some more technical answers, and of course I would suggest the two of them talk to their Dr. about this issue as well.

I really don't know if this is something I could stay around for, I know there are ways you can significantly reduce the risk, and I know there are couples that get through it, but that is a bombshell I am not sure I could take as a newlywed.

2007-12-12 03:13:36 · answer #7 · answered by JA in SC 3 · 0 0

If she is in love, I hope she would not choose leaving him as an alternative, especially if they've planned a wedding! That would be so heart breaking... It is possible for the two have sex, but that risk is there. I'm so sorry for them. I hope all works out for the best.

2007-12-12 03:13:21 · answer #8 · answered by ☆BB☆ 7 · 0 0

Actually, I know someone that was married to an HIV positive man. They have a child (who is now a teen) and neither her or her child is HIV positive. Strange as it is, it is true. But this is rare, and I would NOT suggest this woman having unprotected sex with this man.

2007-12-12 03:15:08 · answer #9 · answered by HellzBellz08 4 · 0 0

NO.
HIV is an STD. She may already have the virus if they were having unprotected sex prior to her knowing. She needs to be tested again.
If they love eachother, there is no reason to leave the relationship. Knowledge is power. Get some.

2007-12-12 03:16:45 · answer #10 · answered by Geenahh 3 · 1 0

Sure it's possible. The virus isn't always spread. Maybe they used condoms. She's playing with a loaded gun however. (no pun intended) If she leaves she needs to be tested on a regular basis. That little virus can stag dormant for years and then just show up one day and eat you alive.

2007-12-12 03:13:49 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

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