The whole time they dated and throughout their marriage, come to find out, hes cheated on every woman he has been with...his wife left, he was distraught, he seeked counciling, and swears he is "reformed" not only because of the therapy but he said he was so devasted when she left ...yahta yahta, u can see where im going with this...how do i trust him? Do you think a perpetually cheater CAN change?
2007-12-12 01:29:11 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Only when he's in the grave.
2007-12-12 02:02:40 · answer #1 · answered by S K 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You tell us cause you have already established he has cheated on every woman he has been with.
I would be very concerned about STDs.
From my own observations in life I do know and believe some that has been a habitual cheater can change but it has taken something drastic or a life changing experience that brought that around. Still the person had to maintain and take precautions to keep from falling back into that area of weakness.
2007-12-12 01:42:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You already have doubt in you mind about this relationship. This relationship would be a total waste of your time. You will always see him a the perpetual cheater that he is. You deserve so much more. You will never be able to trust him.
2007-12-12 01:37:22 · answer #3 · answered by Cherri 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I married a cheater and trust me once a cheater always a cheater. It may take him awhile before he starts doing it again but eventually they always do. Especially when things and going there way or you might have been arguing for awhile and instead of him trying to work it out he finds a female and sleep with her, Sad but so true...Just don't let your guard down
2007-12-12 01:35:40 · answer #4 · answered by shavone c 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, they can. And I say that from experience from being on both sides of the fence with this one.
Some people cheat because of psycological issues. The fact that he is done making excuses for himself and is seeking counseling is a good sign that he's ready to change.
Of course I would also be aware that he DOES have a bad track record, and to make sure that I look for the signs that point to cheating. All I can say is that some people CAN change, but at the same time, others just arent capable. Its going to be something that you will have to use your best judgement on. Make sure you can tell the difference between him being real and him being charasmatic (otherwords, lying to you about his character)
2007-12-12 01:31:57 · answer #5 · answered by melissa 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes they can. Unfortunately sometimes too late. In other cases (like my case) age has a lot to do with it. I married the first time at 19,,,yep,,,recipe for disaster. Cheated left and right....My second time around I married at 30,,,have been happily married for 7 yrs and I haven't even flirted with anyone or look to side,,,,so yes,,,cheaters can change,,,But only time and circumstances can tell.
2007-12-12 01:43:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, a cheater can change but only he can do it. You can't do it for him and if he goes back to his old ways it will NOT be your responsibility. Go into this with your eyes wide open. It is your decision to choose him to be in your life JUST AS HE IS or to back off. Good luck. No one should tolerate living with a cheater.
2007-12-12 01:46:55 · answer #7 · answered by Brent 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think that he can change. He may go to councelling but he will always find another "better person" than you. The same thing happened to me and no matter how long I was with him I could NEVER trust him. Sure enough he cheated about a dozen times on me. So dont let your guard down.
Good luck.
2007-12-12 01:54:05 · answer #8 · answered by my life my joy...bailey :-) 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is your choice if you want to take a risk on this guy or not, I recomend that you dont sleep with him without using protection, as he sounds like he may be at a high risk for stds, I dont get why thats not your #1 concern? Your so hell bent worried about him being with others, when you should be more alarmed by what disease he may bring to you, so stop trying to protect your ego & protect your body as I see this more of a threat then anything.
2007-12-12 01:46:55 · answer #9 · answered by penelope 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry to say that he will probably never change. Cheaters are cheaters and you are VERY wise to be considering this. I would find someone without that kind of history. Good luck.
2007-12-12 02:09:06 · answer #10 · answered by Babycat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd like to think that a perpetual cheater could change. Unfortunately, experience has taught me otherwise. If he'd do it to a woman he committed his life to, why would he NOT do it to you?
2007-12-12 01:32:42 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋