i was mad about someone years ago that i was with on and off for a few years ,i met the man i am with now 5 years ago and married to him but i cant stop thinking about my ex even after all this time sometimes i can go for months with out thinking about him then all of a sudden im doing it again and it makes me feel depressed , i do want to be with my husband i just dont know how to let go of the past
2007-12-11 23:08:52 · 17 answers · asked by janey1971 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
As long as ur happy with ur husband, think y u and ur ex parted in the 1st place, then u can leave the past in the past.
2007-12-16 21:15:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont let your imagination get the best of you, as this is whats happening, if you reversed the men & lets say it was the old flame that you married & your hubby was the ex boyfriend, you would be in the same boat but with different men, I believe that this is nothing more then a fantasy situation, we all dream of what could have happened & instead of being 100% happy & satisfied with what we have we want to beat oursleves up over what we dont have. Dreaming about your ex is a waste of time, as Im sure he,s not dreaming about you, men dont live in the past as much as women do, so I say, stop this behavior & start enjoying your hubby as he is your life now, put the old flame in your back pocket & move on, living in a fantasy world is usless wasted time.
2007-12-12 01:37:46 · answer #2 · answered by penelope 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It will pass. Just dont do anything. Marriages arent perfect becuase people arent perfect. Just dont go do something stupid. You will possibly meet other "nice guys" through out your marriage. Doesnt mean you gotta do 'em. or even stress over them. You've only been married a year, and your coming off as this weak? You totally disrespect your husband when you make yourself available to other men. Hey, I'm not saying having a guy flirt with you isnt nice. I rarely go out with just me and my girlfriends, but when i do, you can bet someone will try to hit on me, say all the right things, make me blush, (yes, i admit we wll go to some bar) anyway, ive been married going on 7 yrs. and well, its good to know "you still got it" lol! BUT!!! You want to know the BEST thing about some guy hitting on me??? I get to hold up my hand and say, "Sorry, I'm married". It ends right there. I'd be concerned that you have only been married a year and you already cant get your mind off someone else. I've been married for 7 and i still cant get my mind off my husband! But maybe you can try this. If your having trouble still not keeping you mind of this guy. Go somewhere for the weekend with just you and your husband. Put him in the spot light for a while. Maybe its not the guy thats got you thinking, maybe its just your husband was away and you need a little attention. That's ok, just make sure you get it from him. Dont be afraid to take the intiative and plan a getaway, i bet that'll take you mind of the other guy, good luck to you.
2016-04-08 22:27:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been married to my hubby for 11 years but have been with him for 18 years in total and I still think of an ex-boyfriend every now and then.....I'm human after all. I know I did the right thing back then and a good bit of advice is "you made your bed you have to lay in it" but if your not happy "get out and change the sheets" :-) Ps I'm very happy but sometimes we all need to escape to a dream world to keep us sane!
2007-12-12 02:01:27 · answer #4 · answered by Mel E 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you have any characters from movies or real life that you really hate ?
Perhaps you can try to picture your ex as the one you really hate or despise whenever thoughts of him creep up.
There must be things you like or love about your husband - think of these and be glad that your husband is the one you chose to marry . I am sure that you will feel much better. Take care.
2007-12-11 23:23:51 · answer #5 · answered by seeker 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you should tell your husband how you feel.... it will lift a lot of weight from your shoulders. you never know, he may even think about one of his ex's.
you never said how or why it ended with your ex so its hard to put a finger on what the reason for you thinking about him is.
i suggest you tell your husband and reassure him that its nothin serious... maybe you could meet up with your ex to see how he is doing and catch up together, obviously ONLY if your husband is comfortable with this.
do you think that because your married now and happy that you might be frightened ur ex is unhappy and not found miss right yet? you know, to confirm with yourself that he has moved on also?.... he might even be married! think to yourself 'how would i feel if he is very happy, maybe married with children'... if it upsets you then i suggest you need to start thinking about who you want in your life.
2007-12-11 23:30:07 · answer #6 · answered by *Xx Ashleigh xX* 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why didn't you marry the one that your obviulsyl in love with, instead of your husband?
ps theres a song or something that goes: "if you cant be with the one you love, then learn to love the one your with"
2007-12-11 23:34:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sit down ask yourself some basic questions..
why did i finish?
why did i marry someone else ?
am i happy ?
just remember you always think of the good times not the bad
2007-12-11 23:51:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There may be something lacking in your marriage. OR you could be using this "wudda, cudda been" for times when you're feeling down. Please try to accept reality, and enjoy your marriage. If you think you may have problems, then bring them to the fore and resolve them.
2007-12-12 05:55:02 · answer #9 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Read, "The Road Not Taken" That should help you out.
2007-12-12 00:28:00 · answer #10 · answered by bootsontheroad 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋