I have a friend who is married. Me and my wife and he and his wife often go out for drinks, dinners, and just hanging out. He and I often play golf on fridays, and we oocasionally go out of town on business. The problem is that he is ALWAYS cheating on his wife. We went on a guy's weekend ski trip to Tahoe and the last night we were there he never came back to the room (partied with some chick he met). He's also constantly asking me to lie and cover for him. I've played along until now, when his wife accused ME of being a bad influence on him and said that my friend tells her about how I cheat on my wife all the time which ISN'T TRUE! I confronted my friend about it and he apologized, but then got defensive when I told him I wasn't going to lie for him anymore and to leave me out of his stories. Now his wife is mad at me and doesn't want to hang out anymore, he's being a jerk, and I'm wondering why I am sticking up for him? Thoughts?
2007-12-11 17:23:21 · 13 answers · asked by ? 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yikes- I would talk to your wife. Rumors get around fast and she might want to hear it from you first. Explain WHY you can't hang out with them anymore, she should definitely understand. I feel really sorry for his wife though.
2007-12-11 17:30:38 · answer #1 · answered by Just Tryin' to Help 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are turn being a good friend & a good person. Whatever you choice there will be someone that will be hurt & be angry with you...so choice the lesser evil. You knew what is right, so do it. Remember this, "The only necessary thing for the triump of evil is for a good man to do nothing". But maybe now timing is wrong because his wife will only think that you are just lying & reversing the story. The best thing to do now is to stay away from them, & let time help his wife to discover the truth.
2007-12-11 17:45:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think your right for standing up to him.
Honestly as much as it would hurt to lose them as friends you and your wife may have to distance yourselves from them. Also you and your wife if need be, sit down and talk with them. But when the truth comes out, and your friends wife finds out about his infidelity, be there as a friend to comfort his wife, and be supportive.
I don't blame you for not wanting to be in the middle of this. Especially when it doesn't involve you at all.
2007-12-11 18:09:58 · answer #3 · answered by Bryan M 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW, yea i wouldnt know what to do either....i think i would just tell her to watch him and check up on him and nothing more maybe and hopefully she will get this hint..
or...
you and your wife can plan it out, tell your wife to tell her. and act like you dont know anything about it so if your cheater friend asks about it, you can say that your wife was accuseing you and you just told her that its only him. and she told his wife got it? hope i didnt lose you..
think about it she is going to find out soon and when he admits it his self the truth is going to come out about everything!! and he will also say that you knew about it and than she will NEVER forgive you ---- plus your friend is aloser for cheating anyways and your wife is going stop you from hanging with him--- hey ask your wife why she hasnt made you stop hanging from him already? but , anyways who would you rather have for a friend?? or just stop talking to both of them until she finds out her self
2007-12-11 17:35:55 · answer #4 · answered by girl19 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
there is not any longer something incorrect with you. What happens is which you're having doubts approximately your marriage and you think of which you're no longer arranged for that yet. whilst somebody loves somebody there are no longer doubts, no jealousy, and no hate, no longer something that could make this love breakable. No ones can separate somebody that have lots love and admire for his/her soul mate. I don’t understand in case you have suggested, yet those 2 females that are drawing near you presently they have some thing in consumer-friendly, all of them got here from a bad marriage. Don’t you think of that there is a few thing incorrect with them? They understand you're married and that they don’t seem to care. Temptations are in everywhere and it somewhat is as much as you to compliment even if in case you will fall for that or no longer. in the experience that your spouse is the only you particularly love then there could desire to be no doubts. How she might experience if she is acquainted with which you have doubts on your relationship? i think of you may desire to pay interest to that and think of of what ought to ensue in the experience that your spouse unearths out which you're having those concepts or maybe worse in case you particularly cheats on her. If my husband try this to me i could enable him circulate to look for his happiness and it could destroy my heart yet i like him greater effective than the rest in this international and if he's not extremely joyful with me then i could no longer be satisfied the two, so greater valuable circulate on and stay his existence, yet I don’t understand your spouse. only think of of it and have a call when you consider which you could’t have 3 on the same time it would not be honest to every physique.
2016-11-25 23:56:18 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Birds of a feather flock together. This is what happens when you hang out with people who are not honest and live immorally. You gotta make some choices here.
2007-12-11 18:03:18 · answer #6 · answered by Sondra 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my opinion- take it how you want-
I would tell her, i know you dont want to hurt her, and then again it could back fire on you because she could think your just trying to get back at her or him since your not talking and shes mad at you at the moment,
what i would do is take pics or video of him in the act, have proof ready words are NOT ENUFF trust me (experience)
just let her know whats been going on, i know you 2 were boys and all, but honesty is more important, do you want her to live a lie forever?
in my view- i would rather know then not to know.
its your decision. what does your wife think? you should talk to her baout it also
-maria
2007-12-11 17:36:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
the dude needs to grow up. if kids are involved then he is a big selfish dik.
ask him point blank what he would do if he came home and found his wife in bed with a good looking young stud that made her feel great. if he says he would get mad, then he is a hypocrite....the lowest form of human.
sometines you outgrow your friends, he might be one of them.
2007-12-11 17:29:42 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You know what - those two will affect your marriage. Stay clear of them. If you really care about their marriage, your wife should talk to his wife and let her know you won't stand for it anymore either.
2007-12-11 17:28:15 · answer #9 · answered by Equinox 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do not ever be his alibi for anything. Him and his wife have issues and don't even get involved with them.
2007-12-11 17:37:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋