I have been married for 4 years . We ended up in financial hardship and had troubled paying rent. He came to me about a friend he knew who needed a place to live tomhelp with rent. She ended up moving in with us 4 months after we married. I always had a suspicion something was wrong but could never put my finger on it. I ended up pregnant, and everything was just weird. I delivered the baby and 5 weeks afterwards found out they had been having a affair for 4 yrs. We ended up going to counseling and everything was fine. he had no contact with the other women until she had contacted him telling him that she hopes everything is what he wanted. Apparently, he emailed her using wrk email and they had another "1 night" stand, and she became pregnant. To make things worse, I am now pregant with his 2nd child and do not know what to do. He told me she wants nothing to do with him, and that he was just a sperm donor...I want my daughter to grow up with her parents, & not a broken famly
2007-12-11 16:22:08 · 27 answers · asked by Elise0202 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
how many more times is he going to see her, how many times until u just can't overlook it anymore? i would rather be alone than with a man i could never trust. one mistake is forgivable, but never two of them. your seeing him for who u want him to be and not who he really is.
2007-12-11 22:32:31 · answer #1 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry...but he does not sound like a man that can be faithful. I know that you may love him and you want your daughter to grow up in an unbroken home but sometimes it may be better too. He will probably always cheat on you. Ask yourself if you really want to live in a marriage like that ...not knowing who he is with or where he is at? There is bound to be fighting, etc..over it so do you think that is good for your daughter? Really think about this before making a decision one way or another for your own good and for your daughter's. Lots of children grow up in broken homes. If you leave him just make sure that you do not rush into another relationship because you do have your daughters welfare to think about. Make sure that it would not only be a good relationship for you but for her as well.
2007-12-11 17:19:45 · answer #2 · answered by susie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he wont change , divorce him now, i married a player , was married 19 yrs , very unhappy 19 yrs , he started cheating 3 yrs into marriage , I stay for sake of kids . What a fool I was.Thought maybe if I turned a blind eye to what he was doing ..as long as me and the kids were taken care of would be ok.I was wrong I put my self at risk,,health wise.
Whats sad we had a wonderful sex life too , I wasn't a challenge to him.Some men always need challenges.
I came from having 3 step moms 3 step dads , so i stayed fo r the kids ,, The kids and I were miserable.
note added .you want your daughter to think its ok to be treated like you are? show her what a strong woman is .Mom she learns these things from how you handle them. You let your man run over you , she will let same thing happen to her .
2007-12-11 16:33:55 · answer #3 · answered by Will You Take The Red Pill ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i hate to say this but in your case i would break the family now for the sake of your kids because he will only break it later when they are older and it will hurt worse Once a cheat always a cheat. And he's extra special he did all this rite under your nose in your OWN home. Your kids deserve better and so do you believe me if they do it once and get away with it they'll do it again after all they didn't care if they hurt your feelings the first time what will stop him next time If your feelings didn't matter once.
2007-12-11 16:32:45 · answer #4 · answered by poo~poo 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't you see a pattern here. Chances are he never stopped seeing her. Do you think you deserve this type of treatment??? If you do.......then stay with him. But if you have any sense at all you will leave him. You daughter will thanks you for it later in life. It will teach her that she should not settle for less. And that her husband should be faithful and respectful to her. Everything that your husband is not. There are plenty of other great men out there. Sounds like your kids are still living with a broken family.
2007-12-11 16:29:38 · answer #5 · answered by Spirited Virgo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The family is already broken because your husband has kids from two different women. Legally, he's responsible for all.
I don't see how your own marriage could possibly work out--this will not be the last cheating episode. How healthy is that for your daughter?
2007-12-11 18:17:25 · answer #6 · answered by Sondra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a bad situation. You're right - your children need both parents. Do what you can to save your marriage, but make sure your husband does his part as well. Make sure he knows you will not allow cheating any longer. If you have to leave for a little while to get that point across, do so.
2007-12-11 16:35:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg. i know you feel terrible. i went through the same thing. my husband cheated and got a girl pregnant from a "1 night" stand and ever since I decided to stay with him and get past it my life has been hell. their son is now 2 and the girl told me that they still have sex. she lives hours away...the son lives with her mother where my husband and i live but he still manages to have sex with her when she comes in town. i thought i could handle the situation since she doesnt live here but since i know that theyve had sex at least once in the past year. the trust is so totally gone. he and i have a 1 year old together but knowing that he has another child that looks just like my son living 10 minutes away really bugs me. i thought i could handle it and weve been married almost 2 years but its impossible. the resentment i have towards him is crazy. i find myself wanting something bad to him. i hope he falls and breaks his neck or just goes to prison for life or something. i no longer have the tingly feeling when i see him and when we have sex i feel nothing cuz the sparks are gone......long story short unless you can TRULY forgive him the resentment will eat you up. Im filing for divorce monday. its too much to handle.
2007-12-14 03:22:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A broken family is better than this family. He will always cheat on you and you will always be miserable. This means that your kids will grow up in an unhappy home and will think that it is normal. I cannot believe that you forgave him after he brought her into your house. I would not believe the one night stand story either.
2007-12-11 16:45:24 · answer #9 · answered by kim h 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
very tough life ahead for you, you are being cheated right from the start. If your husband remains what he is, wonder how is he going to be a good father of the 2 children. Seek proper counselling about your situation. Best wishes.
2007-12-11 16:30:35 · answer #10 · answered by George 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You now know you picked wrong sorry to say. Your husband has no character and betrayed you twice..Go home to your parents and re group. Divorce and go for child support. I am so sorry things went wrong..This is a tough lesson to learn...Your job now is to raise your children and take a break from men for awhile..Your daughter will not grown up with her father in your home. He ruined that....
2007-12-11 16:30:54 · answer #11 · answered by Cinnamon 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋