This is my first time giving birth and I am debating whether to have only my husband in the delivery room, or my two sisters and close friend as well? The hospital will allow numerous visitors so that wont be an issue.
My husband wants it to be just him and I, but I feel like I'm going to need moral support from women who have been in my position.
Any inputs would be appreciated.
2007-12-11 15:34:56 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
I had my husband and my aunt (like a mother) and my best friend the first time, and I had my husband and my aunt the second time. It is entirely up to you, and what you are comfortable with. The first time, I actually had more than that origionally in the delivery room, but I ended up kicking my cousin and my sister out! Lol.. they completely understood, as should anyone who is around you. I think it's great to have as many people as youre comfortable with, because youre right, the man has no idea exactly what you are going through, so it's nice to have women by your side who have been there too, but I do see your husbands point too, he probably wants to be the one to be there for you the most, and like a personal thing or something. But maybe if you explain to him why you want a woman in there with you. Even if you compromised and just had him, and one other woman?
I think it's more your desicion, but it should be partly his too. I think it'd be a good idea to sit down with him and weigh out the pros and cons, and explain why you want it this way and listen to why he wants it his way.
Good luck and congratulations!!
2007-12-11 15:47:17 · answer #1 · answered by Butterfly 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You may feel very different when you are actually in labor. You may find you only want your husband there, or could be quite comfortable with everyone there. However, your husband is going to be going through many changes once the baby is born..... it would be a good idea if you made sure he is the only one in the delivery room, but that your friends can help during labor. It is usually pretty long anyway, and he'll appreciate the respite. As a mom who had many friends with me during labor, and none during delivery (it was the old days)..... the delivery is so intense, you wouldn't notice if your friends were there anyway, but you would really notice if your husband wasn't!!! Put him first, and the rest will work out OK.... not worth a power struggle.
Good luck!!!!
2007-12-11 16:01:16 · answer #2 · answered by Kichi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you start hand picking people that you want to be there, feelings can get hurt. Your visitors can be in the waiting room and visit throughout labor, but i would reccomend that you have your husband there during the actual delivery. It is so special and great to share with one another a very intimate time. As your visitors come throughout the laboring time, they will offer advice--always remember to do what you feel is best for you and the baby. Best wishes!
2007-12-11 15:42:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
My husband doesn't do well with these situations, so I had family with me! Actually, my dad's presence soothes me so he was with me for my last two deliveries. It is great to have someone soothing and supportive, as well as being able to encourage you and help you to focus.
Talk to your husband and maybe compromise by having him and one female. Or explain to him that you are very nervous and want as much support as possible. This is his baby too, but this is for your comfort and may be necessary to keep you calm.
In addition, consider this as well: the doctor will be present with 2-3 nurses, and a respiratory therapist. That is already 4-5 people. How big is the delivery room? :-)
2007-12-11 18:56:22 · answer #4 · answered by Chelle 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had only my husband the first time. It was a very special and intimate moment for us. I didn't want to share it with anyone else.
The second time, he was away with the military, so my mother was there. Again, it was a very special time. My mother getting to see me give birth to my daughter. It was beautiful.
With my 3rd, my husband and mother-in-law were in the room. I had so many people looking at my nether regions by that pregnancy that I just didn't care anymore. lol You wanna take a look? Go ahead! lol
Do whatever you feel comfortable with, but let your husband be part of the decision too. This is just as important to him as it is to you. Compromise if you can. Perhaps your friends and family can be in there while you are in labor and wait in the waiting room when you actually deliver. Or vice versa. They can always be waiting and be called in at anytime that you want/need them. They can also be asked to leave at anytime that you want/need.
2007-12-11 15:37:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
you have the right to tell anyone in the room to get lost at any point. labor usually lasts a long time so what i would do is let them sit with you for awhile but when the baby is closer to coming ask them to leave so you and your husband can be alone for it. but if you have a quick process then id just let it be you and your husband. i know its like your leaving them out but its your choice and they need to respect your wishes. and as for moral support that is what your husband should be for. give him that chance if at any point hes not cutting it ask him to bring someone else in too. remember you have all the control with this. best of luck ^_^
2007-12-11 15:43:46 · answer #6 · answered by AnGeL.SlayeR 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is funny lol! When I had my first I was worried about anybody looking at me down there even my doctor! I only wanted my husband in the room, and he didn't' care, but as soon as I got there I needed my mommy lol! than my best friend showed up! I so didn't want her in there, but when you are all drugged up or in so much pain you could care less and just want it out. With my second child the same thing happened Cept I wanted my mom so bad, and she was stuck at work she got there 2 hours before he came out I was so relaxed when she got there.
2007-12-11 15:48:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, there is going to be so much female support you may not want your sisters and friend there.
Personally I enjoyed it being just me, my husband, midwife and nurse. A nice, close private environment. But this is a decision you will have to make with your husband.
2007-12-11 15:38:45 · answer #8 · answered by FaerieWhings 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you can talk to him and tell him that it can start out just you and him but if you need more moral support from mothers that have given birth before you will need other people there. Good Luck and Happy Holidays....
2007-12-11 15:38:37 · answer #9 · answered by Deborah P 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's all up to you! Do whatever you feel comfortable with! I personally am only having my husband with me, but that's because I am not comfortable with the thought of other people being there. A lot of women like to have their mother or sisters with them. It depends on you! Good luck!
2007-12-11 15:38:28 · answer #10 · answered by Mikey's Mommy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋