Should people just take the past, put it in a box and hide it away for the rest of your life? Or is it healthy to dwell?
By other people's standard they would probably think I've had it easy in life...however each person can only handle so much, right? So what's difficult for me might not be difficult for you.
SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY.
Thanks xo
2007-12-11 15:09:37 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
thanks googie..that's actually makes sense
2007-12-11 15:38:45 · update #1
See:
Time spent living in the past, is time lost living in the present. This is not to say that we should not learn from the past only a fool would not, and it's true thatour strongest ties in the present are predicated primarily on shared experiences from our past, (memories of good times shared together is the basis for deep friendships and love).
However to dwell on unhappy memories, and things that might have been is an unhealthy pastime, from which no good can come. Sadness and dispare and do not beget confidence and a positive outlook, and only make it harder to overcome adversity in your life. And yes it is all relative - what is a "bad" experience for some, is the day-to-day existance for others.
A ritual & repetative, but healthy example of testing the past and then getting on with the present is how children approach each day. Kids wake up each day wondering if the rules have changed - and then set off to find out. This is much the same as having a powerful dream at a young age, and then waking up, and being unable to fully differentiate between the dream and reality. I remember one such dream - I awoke believing that my favorite Aunt & Uncle had visited and brought me a pair of cowboy boots. I must have been about 4 or 5 at the time. I awoke and looked around my bed to put my new boots on - and could not find them. A search of our little ratty apartment didn't turn them up. Then I was sure my older brother must have gotten up before me, stolen them, and he must be wearing them, I was obsessed and inconsoleable for a week about those boots. I remember not understanding why mom would be part of such a rotten prank as to hid them from me.
Good luck. Don't spend too mch time looking for boots that aren't there and never were.
2007-12-11 15:41:58 · answer #1 · answered by jtrall25 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
One can only take your word that your life has been very hard. There are no indications or illustrations of hard.Were you beaten regularly? Did you live with little food? Did you have to do heavy chores? Did you have to work and missed much of your childhood? Did you lose your parents and end up in a non-loving foster home? If you have experienced this hard life, then you know what you want to avoid in the future, what positive thing to do to get on with living. All I can gather from this "dwelling " business is you're feeling sorry for yourself and you want others to feel sorry for you also.
2007-12-11 23:36:59 · answer #2 · answered by googie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dwelling can be both, healthy and unhealthy. Healthy in the since that u understand that things you have been through, make you who you are, like it or not. Your past has helped build your strength and your weaknesses. Unhealthy, when you allow these things to repeat themselves which can cause you harm. Or these things stop you from progressing in life, it's a danger because you are stuck in blackness, and that's never good. We all need the light to survive. I hope my words have helped and even encourage you. Be Cool!!!!
2007-12-12 05:30:04 · answer #3 · answered by Wright 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Remember that everyone has a story the way you deal with your story and that will either hurt you or help you maybe you should see a therapist I do and it helps but try and not dwell on things if you pretend to be fine and happy people around you will enjoy your company a lot more.
2007-12-11 23:20:53 · answer #4 · answered by consultant? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dwelling is not healthy, it causes you to be depressed and unable to move on with your life.
I suggest you get over it, don't lock it away, you need to let it go and look forward.
Almost everyone has a hard life, you just need to move on and try to make the best of it.
2007-12-11 23:18:06 · answer #5 · answered by paganmom 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't think it helps to dwell on the ugly parts of life. By moving on, you can accept your life as it is and from there, make progress. Does that sound interesting?
2007-12-11 23:14:14 · answer #6 · answered by craukymuvilla 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Everyone has difficult things to deal with. If you dwell on it, it will cripple your future.
2007-12-11 23:19:23 · answer #7 · answered by I Love Howie Carr 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't dwell on it but reflect on it in times of success to remind you what you had to endure to get there. It will make your success more precious.
2007-12-11 23:23:02 · answer #8 · answered by sammy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋