How do u deal with someone that u can not stand. ok I got preg with my son under (bad terms!!!).My son dad did not want nothing to do with my son at first.I'm married and my hubby is the one that help me thru everything and been there from day 1. Ok now my son dad is tryin to get back in his life- I'm trying so hard to work with him but he makes me sick.His mom thinks im being unfair cause of the pass and what he put me thru.I think she is not seeing it thru me eyes and she did the same when it happen to her.Ok my Q is how do I handle this with out going crazy.I have ended up in the ER twice dealing with them.My family want me to do whats best for the baby but cant handle this.I really feel sick when see him.When my son is at his house and it only 2 times a month right now I go crazy.I dont truth him at all and I mean at all. what do I do??
2007-12-11 14:13:50 · 6 answers · asked by apple m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he make me sick cause i never liked him like that-- He sleep with me when I was drunk he was my friend I trusted him. He said he was drink and was on drugs so he did not to it with a bad heart but I don't care.It's to hard for me to put behide me. He has no right he signed them over.I'm just trying to do what best for my son but I dont know how to hahdel it
2007-12-11 14:39:02 · update #1
You need help dealing with yourself and your emotions.
Work on yourself first. Then worry about this crazy man. Try professional therapy.
Good luck.
2007-12-11 14:20:07 · answer #1 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old is your child? Did his birth father ever help by paying child support or just doing something to help you out? Did the grandparent's see their grandson even though you and the father weren't together?
One thing you need to remember, liked or not, your child has a father. If that father would be willing to give the said child up so your husband could adopt him, that's another option. If that's done then his family needs to know and why. This could also put them off limits to the child.
Seek the advice of an Attorney to know what your rights are and everyone else. Consults are usually free.
2007-12-11 22:32:46 · answer #2 · answered by Mignon F 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok you got me on this one. Just do what's best for the child. If your husband is a good father to the child then ask the boys father to allow your husband to adopt. If he won't then all I can say is get used to him being around. It is his son. You managed to get pregnant with that guy so there was at least 30 minutes in your life where he didn't make you sick. Don't expect his mom to ever see your side of this.
2007-12-11 22:23:00 · answer #3 · answered by docC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, he is the boys father...so unless you can prove he is being abusive or hurtful towards your son, you have to allow him visitation time. it is wonderful that you have moved on and found a man to support you and to comfort you and help you through this, but you also have to realize this is his son too. you say that he makes you sick...why is that? is it because of how things were in the past? if he is trying to make things better with his son now, I would encourage it. a lot of men want nothing to do with their children, and if he is trying...I say let him. it doesn't mean you have to allow him unsupervised visits, if you don't trust him, have it court ordered that the visits be monitored until you feel more comfortable with them being alone. you cant however chose to keep the two of them apart just because you dont like what happened between you and him. as for his family...it has nothing to do with them. this is between you and him and the child you made together. doing what is best for the baby is allwoing both parents to be involved in their childs life even if they are no longer together. unless you can prove he is hurting or in any way causing danger to your son, you have to be the adult and allow him time with his child. whether he makes you sick is irrelevant, it is how he makes your son feel. that is what it is all about, the child. it doesn't matter if you dont like the dad, or if you had a bad past with him, it is how the child feels and what is best for him.
my husband is going through this exact problem with his ex girlfriend. she refuses to let him see his son or have any interaction with him because she is upset that my husband moved on and married and had a family with me and did not chose her. she is bitter and taking her aggressions out on my husbands relationship with his son. she has no problems taking my husbands money for support that she says she deserves for the child, yet has no problem keeping the boy from my husband saying he is unstable which couldnt be farther from the truth. i am not saying this is your situation, but please think carefully about your decisions and how they will affect your son and his future. allow him to be a dad until he can prove to you otherwise that he is unfit, he may just surprise you.
2007-12-11 22:31:20 · answer #4 · answered by piercing_beauty96 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pray! If the child isn't being abused don't worry about it.
2007-12-11 22:19:23 · answer #5 · answered by moonchild 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to an attorney
2007-12-11 22:17:58 · answer #6 · answered by yyyyyy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋