I divorced my ex-wife 6 years ago. She got pregnant with some other guy, ruined me financially and left.
We have shared physical and legal custody. I have them Saturday morning through monday morning every week.
I have made my kids the focus of my life after the divorce. I volunteer when I can at their school, work with them on their school work. I don't hate my ex, but she always treats me like a second class parent. My kids have even say commented on it (I go out of my way to tell my kids that their mom really is not like that and they probably just misunderstand her when she whines about me....) I also back her up when I hear how she punishes them for something even if I disagree with it.
She always seems to go out of her way to spite me. This weekend I am taking the kids to NYC. I was not planning on returning until Sunday afternoon, but she bullied me into dropping them off at 8:30am for a picture appt she scheduled without asking me first.
Why oh why?
2007-12-11 13:41:42 · 8 answers · asked by Colonel Chaos 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I could have "made a stand this incident, but I have learned winning these types of battles always bites me in the end because she goes out of her way to spite me even more. I don't want to put the kids through that.
I read how ex's like this get there come uppins eventually. Is that when the kids visit me more than her. I could see that happening down the road. They are 13 and 12 now.
2007-12-11 13:43:54 · update #1
Oh my goodness don't listen to her. She is probably just mad because she cheated on you, got pregnant by another man, and I bet you the man left her. She probably realizes what a big mistake she made. You two have shared custody right? You have them Sat. until Mon. That is your RIGHT to have them during that time. Take your kids to NYC and bring them back at the time you originally wanted to. Your stupid ex wife has no right to bully you or demand when you should bring them back. As long as you bring the kids back within the specified custody time you're fine. Don't allow your ex wife to bully you. Stand up and take action if she doesn't co-operate.
2007-12-11 13:54:06 · answer #1 · answered by rosezz50 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I deal with the same type stuff all the time with my husband's ex. Most of the time she is just SOOOOOOO self-centered she can't even wrap her head around how she comes across to people.
My husband is very non-confrontational (completely unlike me), and has a view like you do (one I commend btw, I wish it were my nature to be easy going), but instead, I am opposite,in order to not allow the bullying.
At the MINIMUM, if she made these plans without your permission (yes she needs permission when it's your time), she needs to pick them up. She also needs to bring them back as soon as the appointment is over. No negotiations where this is concerned. You had plans, and she can get over herself.
2007-12-11 22:01:11 · answer #2 · answered by SWEETYPI 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry your not the only person this has happened to. My cousin is going through this right now. What he is doing is confronting her and tell her that she need to fix her act for the kids. Because the kids have to him that the want to leave with their grandma or with him instead of their mother. So i would say you should try confronting her or at least talk to her about this before things get worse. Good luck.
2007-12-11 21:56:36 · answer #3 · answered by Juli 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your a push over. I think you need to start standing up to her. If you have plans with your children then she can change her picture appointment. Those people want money they don't care when the pictures get taken. Your time with your children is special whether she likes it or not. Screw her. Take your kids to New York, and enjoy yourself. Stop letting her run your life, and how you raise your kids. Once you stand up to her you will fell better about yourself. Stop defending her to your kids as well. let them see their mother for who she really is. I bet the picture she paints of you isn't pretty. Good Luck
2007-12-11 21:54:26 · answer #4 · answered by Sweet 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
it sounds to me like she is jealous of the effort you make towards the kids lives in return causing her to become bitter. or maybe she realizes how much better you are at this now than when you were married which causes her to become angry as well. don't stop doing what you are doing. she'll get over it or she'll compete for the affection. you need to ask her why she is so bitter towards you. maybe she doesn't realize she is acting this way towards you.
2007-12-11 21:52:01 · answer #5 · answered by amithidius 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It will catch up with her. Just keep doing the best you can and try not to worry about her.
2007-12-11 21:54:51 · answer #6 · answered by KC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Evidently she isn't happy with her life...The grass wasn't so green for her on the other side of the fence....therefore she wants to make your life a living hell.....
2007-12-11 21:50:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion, that is just the nature of some women. (not all)
2007-12-11 21:47:03 · answer #8 · answered by K M 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋