Im 17 and Want a baby?

Question

Im 17 and With my boyfriend hes 17 to and we really want to start a family, Have our own little baby! We are both mentally stable and my boyfriend has a job and earning money...BUT we live with our parents..Him with his mum and me with my mum and dad. My mum knows i want a baby but my dad would go mad....I had a pregnancy scare the other month and since then i wanted one even more!

I have complete high school ( i live in england we finsh at 16) I have just completed my child care course to. Now i want a family, I called the last one a scare because it was a shock to me and i never thought really bout it but since then i have not stopped! I don't wanna do what other people my age wanna do! I just wanna settle down now. I have 2 neices who are 2 and 1 and they mean the world to me but i just want my own.

Answer 1

you had a pregnancy scare...so now u want to have a baby? That makes no sence! Ur too young to have a baby. have u both even finished school?

Answer 2

Firstly try living together first.. Paying rent and bills are stressful on anyone.. See how you go with that and if you can manage finacially ..putting away $40 a week while doing this also we tell you if you can afford a baby first..
You dont want to bring ababy into the world and not be able to provide for it finacially and if you cant provide finacially you will find you become emotionally unstable due to the stress.. Do you want this for your bub??

If after 6 months of living together and being able to pay eveything on time and save money think about starting to buy for bub. If after another 6 months you still are doing well and want nothing more than to have a baby then I dont see why not.
Some people will say you are to young but if you show the maturity to prepare youreselves before hand then no one can tell you that you are doing the wrong thing..

good luck
p.s my mother had me at 16 and you can not prove that you are a better parent for being "older" and "wiser". i had a bed, toys, love, 2 parents, i wasnt moved around from house to house.. So tell me why being 17 is not a good age?? My mother is now 43 and has a grandson and another grandchild on the way.. How old will you be before you get that joy?? 50?? Age is not that big of a deal as long as you know you can provide a great life.

Answer 3

If it was a pregnancy "scare", I would say mentally, though you may think so you are not ready to have a child. I have wanted children since I was a child myself, but at 19, I barely feel like I could maybe, just possibly, care for a child. I look at my friends who all had kids before they were 18, and they are honestly miserable. Every single one says that even though they love their baby, they really do regret having a child so early.

I would really think about it, think long and hard. Are you still in school? Want to go to college? Figure out a budget, rent, utilities(power, cable, water, trash), car payments, car insurance, cell phone bills. And that's just for you. Then think about diapers, bottles, formula, clothes (that they will more than likely only wear once or twice because they grow so damn quick) laundry soap.

It all sounds happy and smiley until you are strapped for cash and a crying baby is on your hip.
Money is the very first thing that couples will fight about, and it will make or break you.

Please think about this, but if after you've thoroughly thought about it and made sure this is what you want, and you are financially/emotionally stable and you have a good support system, I say go for it! Some people were born to be mothers, and mothers first and foremost.

Answer 4

Here's a couple things you should consider. First, you really need to be living on your own before you have kids. Do you really want your mom and dad looking over your shoulder while you are raising your child? Next think of the expense. In the first year it will cost nearly $2000 just for diapers! Thats not counting clothes, furniture, toys, medicine, food, doctors bills, maternity clothes for you, a baby sitter (because a 17 y/o is not going to make enough money to take care of three people so you will have to work too.) and anything else you can think of. Before you give any serious consideration to having a child, you need to know, without a doubt, that you can take care of yourself. That means holding a job, having your own place, paying your own bills and making and sticking to a budget. So yeah, you might really want a kid now, but how are you going to feel in 9 months when you realize its not just an idea, but reality.

Answer 5

Wow... you take me back. My first child was born when I was 19. I know that your feelings are real,,,,but please believe me,,, your not ready. Unless you have an inheritance,,, how can you be ready financally? Even If you can feed and clothe and put a roof over the babies head,, what will you do if your child has a problem.... a physical or learning disability,,, do you have the resoures to handle that... While I know that it is not likely,,, it does happen. What if in 5-6 years you divorced or your husband dies will you have the job skills you need to take care of your child? The person you are today will slowly change and you will have different needs and desires in 10 years than what you have now. ( I am not saying you should wait 10 years). You will have more to offer your child ,,, you will have lived a little and gained some maturity and experience ,,, if you wait a little while. I love my son and we did fine,,, but we had lots of struggles,,, when I had my 2nd child at a much later time it was so much easier.

Answer 6

Why do you want a baby so young.I am 17 too and I am pregnant, it's not as bad as some people may say it is, being young and having a baby but it's not all good either. Once you have a baby you will never be able to reclaim your life as the way it once was your body either. Even though I am 17 and pregnant I do not encourage it. My pregnancy was not planed nor was it prevented only because my bf is way older than me and he is ready to have a family. I finished school when i was 16, and am taking college courses,so my education is not at risk here. But I do think that it best to wait to have a baby, being that you are 17 and your bf may not be with you for ever. Try to keep your body the way it is as long as you can, you still got alotta livin to do you can start a family any day so why the rush?

Answer 7

Finish school. Try to go to college. Experience Life. Try living with your boyfriend and actually paying bills. Just because your boyfriend is making money it doesn't mean anything because his parents are still taking care of him. If it was a pregnancy SCARE, then it means you are not clearly ready for a child. A child is not reversible or exchangeable. The decision of having a child is a life choice. You cant be a part- time mother! Your life doesn't have the same value once you give birth because your child comes first before anything or anybody!

Answer 8

Just wait a couple more years, get married, moved into your own place, then plan a family. Doesn't your child deserve the best possible life you can give it? You have to be realistic. Having a baby isn't all it's cracked up to be. They are major, major work. They are a 24/7 job.

Set some other goals right now. Finish high school. Begin working and saving yourself. Get engaged. Get married. Move in and enjoy your new husband and life. Then plan a family. You will be so much happier that you did!

Answer 9

You are very young. Wanting a baby when you both have finished school, and you both have good paying jobs is fine. I know how you feel When I was 17 I wanted a baby, and my boyfriend at the time (key word at the time) wanted the baby to. Well when I got pregnant right away he denied the baby told me it wasnt his. He started stalking me, and throwing rocks at my window all hours of the night. One day he told me to come over his house because he wanted to apologize for peeking through my windows and stuff. When he got in the car he started beating me up. To make a long story short at 11 weeks I finally had a miscarriage. I cried and I balled and I was angry with God but I new that even though I was ready to be a mother he didnt want me having a baby with someone like him. You are young you have plenty of time to have a baby. If he want to have a baby with you make him prove himself by you two getting an apartment, and making plans to marry you. Dont just give in because it seems like what you want. Good luck

Answer 10

If you are planning to get married SOON and moving out SOON then you could consider it but are you out of school? Does he make enough to support you and himself and a child if you were out on your own? Is his job stable or will it be going over seas soon? I would not because you dont live on your own and you should want to give it the best life, I would wait till you are married and moved in together I moved in with my Now husband when I was 15 and he was 18 we got married when I turned 16 and Im pregnant now at 17. He supports me he makes lots of money Ive NEVER had to work and We are ready for a child we have our own home were buying it and no one has to help us. I say wait till you have at least that.

Answer 11

Parenthood is NOT at all an easy venture. I had my son when I was 16 years old and would not change it for the world but I at times wish for his sake that I had a college education before he was born so that I could provide him with all that he deserves. He was diagnosed with Autism when I was 18 and he was 2. The rates of Autism continue to skyrocket making every future parent more likely to have a child with this disorder. 2 years ago the rate of Autism was 1 in 166. Now it is 1 in 150 children affected with this disorder. Are you ready to possibly have a child with this or any other disability? I never thought that would happen to me or my family but it did. My adice, wait until your older. I wish I had taken the advice of others for the sake of my beautiful boy. Babies are soo cute but they are tons of responsibility. Good Luck!


****England has higher rates of Autism (1 in 100 kids are diagnosed w/the disorder)