If marriage is all about love and being faithful, then why does a man have a bachelor party and play with whores right before making the commitment to one woman? Does such a man truly love his future wife?
2007-12-11 07:05:18 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I find bachelor parties a very tacky tradition to which many men feel them self pressured into. The same goes for the bachelorette parties who simply seem to be a revenge for the men doing the stripper thing. Any man who things he is missing out on something because he is getting married should stop and not get married till he gets over it.
Other countries don't have this tradition and respect marriage. Perhaps that is why the divorce rate is so high here in the USA.
In some countries there is one party for the couple. At the end the guests trash the place. They bring old bricks, dishes etc. and break them in front the couples place for good luck. It is suppose to signify the first job the couple does together. They call is Polter Abend.
2007-12-11 07:18:43 · answer #1 · answered by Iris R 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
For some reason they have these parties as sewing their last oats or something? They're of the mentality that they will ever get another woman now that they are marrying this person. As if their future wife isn't enough or won't be enough. I've been to bachelorette parties too with the same mentality. Men think women don't act like that but they'd be surprised and the male strippers can be just as bad.
2007-12-11 07:10:28 · answer #2 · answered by nonameblonde 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is not just about love and being faithful. Those are only a few of the key ingredients of a good marriage.
And a man having whores at a bachelor party does not mean he doesn't truly love his future wife. If you think about it, a lot of people believe that marriage is mostly about commitment.
If that were true, then the divorce rate would probably be much, much higher because the husband would be suffocating in the relationship because he will want to have some space for himself but how can he possibly do that if he commits himself to his wife all the time?
A man's love and commitment for his future wife can't be just judged based on the presence of whores in his bachelor party. In most cases, it's his friends who are the ones treating him out and I suppose it's their way of having fun with the bachelor before he opens a new chapter in his life....
2007-12-11 07:59:36 · answer #3 · answered by Lis 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Because it's a tradition that they perpetuate. For many men, they see it as their "last night of freedom" and as an excuse to go see strippers. For some women it's okay, but for others it's not.
My husband had a stripper at his bachelor party, which he had specifically told his friends he did not want more than once. They didn't listen to him and he walked out of his own party. So, not every guy wants one!
2007-12-11 07:20:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sure he does. Why would frivolity like that mean a man doesn't love his wife?
Bachelor parties are more for a guys mates than they are for him. It's an excuse for his mates to get together and play bad boy and look at bare breasts and stuff. It's a rite of passage kind of thing. Don't worry about it.
Most guys I know would pay money to AVOID screwing a prostitutute. You couldn't pay me $100 bucks to sleep with one. Don't worry about it.
I agree it's silly. It's frivolous and it's incongruent. But hey, a lot of things in life fit those descriptions.
BTW, marriage isn't about love and being faithful. Marriage is so much more. Marriage is about work. It's about giving of yourself to the other person. Love and fidelity are such a small slice of what marriage is all about. Marriage can be about frivolity and incongruity and silliness. Marriage is also all about overlooking stupid things that don't look right.
If you don't trust him, don't marry him. Stop fretting about this crap.
Good luck.
2007-12-11 07:12:56 · answer #5 · answered by DearAbby 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
If a man truly loves his bride to be, he is already committed to her and wouldn't want to be looking or fooling around the night before his wedding.
If he has a view that he is giving up something to marry you then he is not mature enough or ready for marriage. Marriage is a conscious choice we make, which says I love you, and I want to spend every night, for the rest of my life with you.
The idea of having a celebration for the couple is what is appropriate. He is not one of the guys anymore, He is now becoming one with his bride and should be viewed as a couple from now on. When you get married you really need to put your spouse first in your life. If you can be swayed by the boys or girls for that matter the night before your big day. what makes you think you will be able to tell the buddies no the day after that or the next week when they all want to go out for drinks... It's a bunch of bull... Same goes for the bride.
Put up with this now & you will be playing second fiddle for the rest of your life or for the rest of this marriage.
2007-12-11 07:43:57 · answer #6 · answered by commoncents 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Any man that can do this in front of the Bride's family and friends is not a man that should get married. It is ok to have a bachelor party if no sex is involved. Hopefully you know your man well enough to know what he will do.
2007-12-11 07:15:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its funny because men say its their last night of freedom and their last night being single... when really... they have been with their fiance for quite a while I'm sure so... in no way were they single or were "free" so-to-speek! If I ever get engaged... which I havn't decided if thats in my future or not... I will not put up with that behavor. I don't believe that strip clubs are for someone(both men and woman) with a significant other, whether its a girlfriend/boyfriend or wife/husband. Its not appropriate and I also find it very disrespectful. For those who are comfortable with it... more power to you but personally, I find it wrong. That is a bar for singles and singles only. But its only an opinion.
2007-12-11 07:28:27 · answer #8 · answered by sweetpea5499 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I've attended over a hundred bachelor parties, and have yet to see one that hired a stripper or a prostitute to come "perform" at the shindig. I think that happens very rarely...
2007-12-11 09:17:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not just before their own wedding, but also all their friends' weddings...that means regardless if they are married or not, they go many, many times...
It is never truly "the last night of fun"...just a lame excuse...if you've never gone to a strip club, you should go at least once to see the trash in there...lol, seriously...I heard a guy once say "I spent over $600 in one night at the strip club"...that's the type of guy the strippers want in there are those idiots who can't control their money...
2007-12-11 07:13:20 · answer #10 · answered by Angel Eyes 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋