Pregnant with another man & divorce not final?

Question

I recently seperated from my husband of 2 years. It was not a good marriage as he was into cocaine and would not come home many nights and would turn his phone off after I would try calling him. Shortly after moving out I started dating someone I had been friends with since the 3rd grade. Long story short, things moved fast and I am now pregnant. My soon to be ex-husband knows about the news. I'm wondering if anyone has been (I know it's a unique situation) in this situation or if they know of anyone who has, and how it all turned out? I really appreciate any responses.

Thanks for such quick responses. I must reply to the gentlemen who said I have no morals. I realize the situation is not ideal. However the situation I was in with my husband was far worse. Have you ever been lied to and abused over and over again by someone who is suppose to love you? Where are the morals of my soon to be ex. I was also moved out of the house and had paperwork filed before any of this happend, however a divorce takes some time.

Answer 1

This is just another example of why most men doesn't trust women. In my opinion, neither one of you believe in your vowels. You must not have been to in love with your husband to go skirting around while you were having problems. It doesn't matter what he did or is doing. You should've done what was right and kept your skirt up. I pity the unborn's father. Long story short : You should've waited till the divorce, then started going out. You have no Morals. Good Luck

Answer 2

well thats what happens when you fool around ! it doesn't matter how long you knew your friend from 3 rd. grade. no man or woman has the right to be with a married man and woman. these are Gods laws.
but at the same time being in perfect as we are things do happen like this all the time . I am sorry for the way your husband did you.
you didn't desever the way he did you I can't say I blame you.
when you have a husband and yet he is out doing what ever ! you know that isn't no way any one of us woman or even a man should have to put up with anything such as that. I to was where you are now. only my ex- he was in to whoring woman for their money he had a baby by the one woman he left me for. I was left for a whore.
and i must say that was very painfull for me I had two children by this man. age 4 yrs. and age 2 . a boy and a girl.
then one day I mint this man he fail in love with me and I fail in love with him. but the only thing good and how it did turn out for me I left Anderson Ind. and went back to my real home. Colo Springs Co.
but what i did to him was funny I wrote a letter to my sister who lived in Ca. and I had a letter to my ex- so my sister could mail his letter from there to him. and always told me no matter where I went he would and could find me ya after five or four months.
honey I went though some offer beatings while I was pregnant by my my ex- this was before he left me for the tramp ! but he was already cheating on me.
please" just be carefull" and take good care of yourself and that little unborn baby! God be with you every step of the way.
once your devoice is done over don't look back that backness becomes your pass ! move on to a better life! where you and your baby can be happy! and have a real life for a change !.

Answer 3

Yes, you are in a bit of a jam, but honesty with the two men and yourself will save you and your baby unnecessary problems. Really sit down and think. Do you love the guy which you are carrying his baby? Are you still in love with your husband? If so, you must ask your husband how he feels about the baby you are carrying. If you are not in love and do not think there is a future, then you must move forward. You have so many open doors that you need to address and close i.e., baby, husband, baby's father. Take each of them and seriously think about what is best for you and the baby.Write down the problems and solutions, you must be very truthful with yourself, you have a innocent life to consider. After you have thought long and hard, and wrote down all your solutions, then talk to someone you trust completely that will not judge, but be brutally honest with the pros and cons of your solutions. After this is done then you must approach the two men involved and discuss the issue. Do this right away. Good luck

Answer 4

My sister was in the same situation.. You should check your local laws. There are some states that have a law that say that if you have a baby before a certain amount of time after a divorce, you need to get a paternity test to be able to name anyone but the husband on the birth certificate. My sister didn't want the baby and she lives with her dad, but everything worked out fine. Congrats on the baby, and I hope all the best for you.

Answer 5

One of my really good friends had the same thing happen....except her situation was even more complicated. She and her ex have a 9 y/o son together, she barely new the father of the new baby, her ex didn't know she was pregnant and she was trying to hide it until the divorce was final, and she didn't succeed and it came out in divorce court that she was preggo. Everything turned out fine. She was worried that her ex would use her pregnancy and new relationship against her in the custody battle, but he didn't and she got custody of their son. She had the baby and is living with the father (but won't marry him for some reason). It definitely wasn't an ideal situation, but once the smoke cleared it all turned out alright.

Answer 6

What difference does it make? He was a bad person and you are divorcing him, you decided to go out and get pregnant (not a great idea) so now you wonder what will happen? Little late isn't it? Not trying to be an a** but really.

If you spend anytime on YA you will realize that your situation is not that unique. There are many people who find themselves in a similar predictament. Forget about how it will trun out and make it happen the way you want it to. You control your life, the mistakes and the good times, not others.

Yoda out

Answer 7

This happened with my sister-in-law and brother, kind of. She was married to her first husband but seperated. He was in the military overseas so the legal proceedings went on and on for months. She met my brother a couple months into the seperation and they started dating...she accidentally became pregnant about 6 months into the relationship. Eventually what happened is she FINALLY was able to get the divorce to go through about a month before my niece was born and she and my brother married about 2 weeks before she was born. Very hectic and stressful at the time. That was 6 years ago and they're still very happily married with 2 daughters. Good luck and your business is your business...don't let anyone put you down.

Answer 8

Just be honest with everyone concerned. Have a DNA test done and declare the baby's actual father on the birth certificate. State in your divorce decree that the child is not your husband's child. Do NOT seek child support from your husband. If you do all of this, everything will turn out as well as it can under the circumstances.

Answer 9

It's always better to close one door before opening another, but since you've already walked thru -- who's to say how your situation will turn out. Hopefully, you both will go your separate ways and remain out of each others life. You have a baby to concentrate on providing a life for now. Good luck and before you marry again -- evulate what you really want in a partner and what you have to offer.

Answer 10

Of course your husband will be angry. After all you are married its natural. But you dont supposed to divorce your husband based on an addiction. Following the bible you should only divorce in infidelity. But in the real world. Divorce him quick,and be independent as see how things go. Like my mom says, a man can get up and leave, but the woman is laying there to stay...God bless and pray alot!