Together 12 years - Thought things were going pretty well. He feels we were thrown into a marriage-type relationship at 19 (my family disowned me), and has never found out who he really is. He's gotten very close to a female friend of his (They've been on what looks like dates). To me, it's cheating, even if there's no sex involved. He says he wants to work it out, but then says he wants to go. I'm so tired and hurt I almost want to ask him to leave (apartment in my name). Says he shouldn't be expected to be 100% exclusive to me - we're not married - he's never promised to be. Says he's never had sex with anyone else while we've been together. It bothers me to be with him 12 years without being married or at least engaged, and I have to decide soon if I needed to end if I want children (we're 30, feel time's running out to decide). Says I'm crazy to argue (thinks it means I hate him) but want still want marriage. I don't hate him, just what he's doing. He still talks to her.
2007-12-11 03:46:33 · 5 answers · asked by Alura_5 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Hunny, you have a common law marriage, anything after 7 years baby, you are married. The dating part would upset me too but I do have to say my best friend is a man, but my husband knows him and his wife and I do go out with him and eat and talk, like best friends do. But my husband knows that he is my guy and my heart is his. There is a trust issue between you and your man, and if you can't sit down and talk things Thur its going to be tuff, marriage(ceremony) is just a stepping stone, its not going to make your marriage work, its got to be you and him. Time is not running out, but the part that really bothers me is the 100% exclusive, What is this, I mean I am 100% to my man and he to me, but he does go out and spends time with his friends and of course, I do the same I would go crazy if not, we have been together 19 years.
2007-12-11 03:58:14 · answer #1 · answered by eeyore6838 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If for 12 years you could not bring him around to say yes and now you want to have a family and a child, it is time to seriously talk it out with him one final time. And start looking around seriously.
2007-12-11 03:52:27 · answer #2 · answered by Naamoku 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your not planning to leave but hes not showing you the attention that you want and if he would you would not want to leave but going on dates with another women is definitely a no no if he did not Marry you in 12 years i don't think that's gone to happen
2007-12-11 04:02:48 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if you haven't given up yet you should. You deserve the whole pie not just a slice of it!
2007-12-11 05:05:12 · answer #4 · answered by frogbfound 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, you are plannng to leave
2007-12-11 03:50:59 · answer #5 · answered by Rana 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋