Disappointments?

Question

On sunday, I was busy with so much work that I didnt get into bed untill 4am. I couldnt wake up the next morning to go back to the routine of getting myself and my daughter ready for work and child care. So, at last minute at 7am, I decided to just stay home. I had already gotten up and started to get ready, but decided against it, so instead of getting back in bed with my husband, I decided to stay on the couch( not to disturb his sleep). At 8am, someone was at my door, they rang once, than twice, therefore I had to get up and when I got to the door, a girl was at my door claiming to be asking for someone whose doesnt live at my home. Red flags flared up. 8AM Wrong Door...okay. I found it odd, and didnt want to think the worst. But seconds later, my husband phone was ringing. Dumb. So naturally, I ck his phone and answered it..hung up. So, I continued to ck his phone overall. And the same person that hung up , is the same person that text, to say, I am here. I waited.

I waited for my husband to wake and when he did, I told him of what had happened and he told me its just a friend whom came to pick him up for work. I asked him if it was just a friend, than why would she lie to my face when I answered the phone. Furthermore, Why wasnt I inform about this friend of whom was coming to pick you at 8am in the morning. He tells me is because of my overreacting that I was presenting to him is why he didnt tell me. I am assuming more to the situation than at the facts. I laugh. And decided to call the woman. Since I was overreacting, I may as well be insane. The coward *****, never answered her phone, but rely to my husband to tell me, i was acting immature. LOL. So I ended up taking my daughter to child care and took myslf out for the day. I didnt want 2 be home and deal with my husband. For i was disappointed and felt disrespected in my home. Above all, I felt cheated and lied to, Friend or sexually friend, why was she at my home. I ask, What would u do

Answer 1

What was he doing in bed sleeping if she was there at 8 to pick him up for work.

It is obvious, I believe in forgiveness but don't treat me like a fool. Wrap the divorce papers in a pretty box and leave it under the Christmas tree. Put on the label, "A little ha ha ha due to your ho ho ho"

Answer 2

They're both lying, and probably having an affair. Doesn't he have a regular work schedule, and if so, why don't you know when he works?

If she was there to pick up someone for work (which is perfectly innocent) why didn't she just say so? If I were picking someone up for work and they weren't up yet, I'd be concerned that they would be late and make sure you got them up.

I'd wait for a few days, then one day get up as usual, go off...take your child to school, then come back and park somewhere where you can see the house but aren't obvious....and watch. If she shows up again (make sure you're at the house by 8 since that's when she shows up). If she shows, give her ten minutes inside the house...then go home (quietly) and see what's going on.

Also, check his phone records. If she's just someone from work, she shouldn't show up on his call lists too often.

Answer 3

Girl,been there done that. My husband cheated on me from the day we met. Don't ask me why I stayed because I couldn't tell you. I know all the signs of a cheater and he does seem like he is not telling you the truth. My husband would tell me the same thing,"I didn't want to tell you because I knew you would blow it up". This girl is coming over while you are supposed to be at work. It just doesn't seem right. If it wasn't a big deal,she wouldn't had asked for someone else at the door. I always say,go with your gut feeling becuase you are probably right. I never listened to mine but I knew in my heart I was right. It comes down to do you want to save you marriage? Does he? If not,save yourself some time and move on. I know it is hard because I stayed with mine and I knew it was over. We have two daughters together and I wanted it to work between us but at the end of the day I knew I had to leave because I didn't want my daughters to grow up thinking it was right for a man to walk all over a woman. Good Luck! If you ever need to talk you can email me because it will not be easy.

Answer 4

Sounds like more than just a ride to work. If there was nothing going on then why won't she answer the phone or talk to you when she is calling your husband. If I were put in this situation I would play it cool, I would try to talk to my husband and not have him LIE to my face, let him man up and tell the truth, then let him know I am filing for divorce. Good Luck to you and your daughter. Don't let him lie to you, right under your face and in your home. It would make me wonder what would of happened if he would have answered the door not knowing you were home.

Answer 5

You should of hit reply on the message & text back...all is cool now come on back and then stood back & waited to see if it was the same chick that was at the door at 8am... You can also take a day or 2 off work & follow him yourself to see if anything is really going on. In my open opinion, yes he is cheating. And is most certainly going to tell you he's not. They always do.

Answer 6

Wait a minute! Why are you jumping to conclusions? Maybe the "other woman" is the one with the issues! You need to trust your husband enough to take his word for it - so ASK HIM ABOUT IT in a gentle and non-confrontational way. This is the man you married, so you must love him and trust him?? There are some terrible people out there that would do anything they can to make you miserable - so trust the man you chose to spend the rest of your life with to be honest with you.

If you can't trust him for whatever reason or if you still think he is cheating - find a marriage counselor!!!! Don't wait, just do it. It will be the best thing you ever did for your marriage.

Answer 7

sorry sweetie but you are right No women should be in your Home alone thats just not respect. And it was wrong for Her that ***** to lie to your face. your husbands a jerk and it looks like this has been happing for quite some time why would she show up at 8? what will u do now ? will u leave him or just get him back for what he did? of course hes lying and all men say i didnt want to tell u cause you'll overract or your to jealous im sure if a man came to your door he'll be thinking like u. if i was in this situtation i would play that game too even though its bad but i wouldnt want to feel sad for myself. Listen men are like this they always want something never ready to settle down, and im sure you are so beautiful but even the most beautiful women gets cheated on i dont know why men do it they usually just go for women who are not even all that u know what i mean. find your self a male freind or leave him you'll get hurt and he'll just find more ways to hide his Lover now that he almost got caught he got out of this one but im sure ur still thinking about it.

Answer 8

Looks like you've read the signs right ... have it out with him first and then consult a lawyer. Sue his sorry a** for all he's got. Take your daughter and go live with your mom. Tell him he's a lying cheating s o b and that you want a divorce.

Answer 9

The ***** has been in my home?!? Oh hell NO! In my bed where I sleep?!? Even bigger hell NO. One thing I've always said, if you are going to cheat, wear a condom and you better not bring her into my home or my bed. Don't bring home any diseases or skanks. That is just lowest of the low. And if nothing was going on and its all innocent, then why did she lie?

Answer 10

Yea they always make it sound like you, when they are hiding something. I would be for finding out what is really going on.
You can not ask him cause he will lie or make it sound like you are just over reacting.
Maybe some tape recorders in the house or you can miss work and hide out ect.. you need to find out the truth or it will start bugging you all the time.