What can I do to be more productive?

Question

I'm intelligent and have many goals. I like getting ideas from others because I feel that we are all connected one way or another as a unit. I need some advice to motivate me to do the right thing so i'll tell you a little bit about my issues so that you can help me resolve them. For 2 months now, I haven't been employed. I do absolutely nothing productive in my life. I'm at home most of the time. I stay up all hours of the night. I don't answer the phone when it rings most of the time unless it's my girlfriend calling me. The rent is backed up which my girlfriend has been paying. I know it's not fair to her. I hate being in this predicament. I look through job postings but I can't find the right job that suits me or interests me. I come from a pretty wealthy family but don't communicate with any of them. They've called me a loser and a liar for years. No one has ever believed in me. I'm trying to believe in myself.

Answer 1

By taking a closer look at the situation you are in and trying to make improvements is the first step to bettering yourself. At this point even if it is not the perfect job for you, you need to get a job. Just get a job in order to pay the bills and then keep looking for the job you truly want in the meantime.
Your girlfriend seems to be very loyal and understanding but you need to focus on getting A job, not THE job or she may get upset with you.
Your girlfriend believes in you or she wouldn't be with you right now. Be proactive and positive, use the time that you are not working to find a job and prioritize your goals. Make a list if you'd like describing your short term goals for getting yourself out of this predicament. Stay positive and don't let your family bring you down.

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -Winston Churchill

Answer 2

I tell you the truth when I say I have been in a situation uncannily similar to this. More than once. I can't tell you what's best for your situation, but here's mine and what I did about it.

After high school I went away to college, but I only did it because that’s what was expected of me. Well, after a year, I dropped out and came back home with nothing to show for it. Then September 11th happened, and I joined the Army. It was the best thing I could have done at that point in time. I got to see and do some amazing things. I was also in some really crappy situations, but sometimes you have to take the bad with the good. Overall, I’m a better person for those bad times. I met and married my husband while in the Army.

After I got out, I moved ‘cross country to be with my husband. At this point, I was checking the Help Wanted ads with no luck. I felt like I had already done so much that I really just didn’t want to go back to a job in retail. I tried a couple of those “no experience necessary!” type jobs in the paper, but since they’re mostly for sales positions, I didn’t exactly excel at them. My husband was working his butt off to earn us money, and I watched a lot of TV. Not exactly a way to grow as a person. Then I decided to go back to school. I figured, hey, I can use this government money from the Army to get an associates degree at a community college, then I’ll get a good enough job and be done with it. I started out going for a human services degree. Then in my first semester I took a psychology class that I loved, and changed my life. Like joining the army was for me years ago, going to school was the best point I could have done right then. I found my passion in psychology, and now I want to get my PhD in cognitive neurology, or maybe neuropsychology.
My parents aren't exactly poor, but I haven't depended on them since I left for the military. I like being able to do all the things in my life that I love without depending on them.

You say you have a lot of goals. Maybe you just need a plan on how to acheive them. Like I said, this is just what has worked for me. I hope, at the very least, it helps you to decide what is right for you.

Answer 3

If your family all think you are a looser and a liar, guess what: You probably are. But, you don't have to stay a looser and a liar.

First, stop lying. Don't expect people to all of a sudden begin believing you just because you "say" you stopped lying. It takes time and they will need to see examples of your new-found veracity. It may seem foreign to not lie, and it may seem like you are not serving yourself by always being truthful, but stick with the truth and eventually you will see the advantages.

Second, stop being a drain on everyone around you, particularly your girlfriend. You've mouched off of everyone you know, your whole life, and now that you are an adult it's time to take some responsibility. Sorry you haven't found your dream job yet but I submit that you will feel better about yourself flipping burgers than sitting around all hours asking whiney questions on Y/A. Grow up! It's step #1 to becoming a winner...

If you don't give me a thumbs up for this straight talk, you're in denial.

Answer 4

You said "I hate being in this predicament" which is a telling sentence. Is it possible that you have difficulty taking responsibility for yourself?

The advice in your answers is all good except for the reproduction guy and I hope you take it to heart. And if you do have to "flip burgers" then be the best dam burger flipper that ever lived. I bet starting McDonalds wasn't Ray Crock's childhood dream.

Peace

Answer 5

Quit fretting about jobs suiting you or interesting you. Unless you get SOME sort of job soon you're not likely to have a girlfriend at all for much longer. Nobody likes a freeloader.


You need to realise that you can't bend life around your wants and needs..... but rather need to bend your wants and needs around your life.

Answer 6

Yup, it looks like denial. Look where the thumbs down are.

Answer 7

STOP USING BIRTH CONTROL AT ONCE!Even if you are not productive you'l be more reproductive!!!!!!