Hi,
My husband and I are in the middle of an acrimonious period. He wants a divorce, but refuses to move out until we have a custody agreement in place (an attorney told him if he moved out I could claim abandonment). Anyway, I can't stand having him here and want to take his keys. We are in a rental apartment in California. We seperated last year, and I rented this apartment in my name only. Five months ago, he moved in when we attempted a reconciliation, but his name was NOT added to the lease. Can the police force me to let him back in?
Neither of us have filed any divorce, seperation, or custody claims as of yet.
2007-12-10 17:43:47 · 10 answers · asked by Jennifer L 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
To the person concerned he'd be out in the cold - the man makes 200k a year, he can afford a hotel! I'm not that heartless!
Thanks for everyone's replies!
2007-12-10 17:52:57 · update #1
Unfortunately, he is very difficult. He refuses to instigate a divorce at all unless I agree to share an attorney with him, agree to 50/50 custody of our child with no child support. I feel I should have primary custody of the kid and that he should pay something for her benefit. He has never, for example, purchased an item of clothing for her or any ancillary expenses. He's paid her school tuition a few times, but that's all. And he makes more money than me.
Anyway, he is threatening to try and get full custody of her unless I go along with the above plan ... essentially extortion. He has much more money than I do, for expensive attorneys and the like, so I fear he might be successful in such a battle.
Oh, also if I kick him out he will consider that a 'hostile act' and also sue for full custody.
Am I wrong or do most guys just leave when they want a divorce?
Why me?
2007-12-10 18:03:26 · update #2
you need to file for separation not divorce. You are responsible for whatever happens in the apartment not him. Get moving!! You can reconcile later if you can but now protect yourself.
2007-12-10 17:49:02 · answer #1 · answered by Modern Man 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Situations like yours make me quite sad. Remember when you got married and you were so inlove with one another. When you first dated, you were always smiling and you couldn't wait for him to call you. The little things he did for you just made you think......wow, he's the greatest guy and so forth.
I know what I said, you might think it's irrelevant but just think about it......he's your husband, you married one another through thick and thin and now he wants to take full custody and you want to throw him out. How cruel can the both of you be towards one another. Try and calm down and just talk to one another like civilized people. Your daughter is getting to see just how cruel grown ups can be with one another. To see her parents so cruel with one another must be heart-breaking.
Come together and talk to each other like the adults that you are and stop thinking and acting like children. Try and work you problems out. If you have a problem with the way he does certain things then tell him that that is what is bugging you about him. Remain friends if you trully can't resolve your issues but stop being or acting like enemies.
Just think about it. Being all civil, solving problems in an amicable manner and all has never taken anything from anyone. Both of you stop being proud. It may seem hard but it's not.
2007-12-10 19:32:08 · answer #2 · answered by sweetdivine 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First, File for legal seperation
Second, Tell him he needs to leave because he is not on the lease. If he will not leave Call the cops.
Third, sign something saying you will not claim abondonment unless he actually abandons you and get it notorized
Fourth, Get a divorce if it doesn't work out, don't let it linger forever.
2007-12-10 17:56:04 · answer #3 · answered by yungin4lyfe 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get a legal separation, but no the police can't make you let him in if you rented the apartment...It would be nice if you and your husband could come to some kind of resolution. For his sake and yours..in agreement..
2007-12-10 18:02:00 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I live in California its to cold for the poor sucker to be locked out have a heart for goodness sake have a heart...its freezing out there.
She Santa will give new hubby for Xmas
2007-12-10 17:49:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
if you have actually told him to leave, and got his stuff out of the apartment, then changed the locks, i dont think you would get in any trouble, just make sure all of his shyt is out already.
2007-12-10 17:55:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If its not his apartment, no one can force you to let him live there. Call the cops.
2007-12-10 17:47:14 · answer #7 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
nope.. he would be kicked out.. the lease is under your name only.. than it belongs to you... ive watched enough cops to know..
2007-12-10 17:52:45 · answer #8 · answered by liveforu 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Sure why not
2007-12-10 17:48:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha do it
2007-12-10 17:49:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋