What are your thoughts on staying married for the sake of a child?

Answer 1

What does that mean? So the child grows up believing that a relationship between both parents is cold, and indifferent?

Everything around us tells us that a relationship is about caring, love and closeness between two adults but if a kid doesn't see it, he/she is bound to repeat your mistakes in his/her own relationships

Answer 2

If there is a way in the world to do it and be civil enough not to be violent and abusive in front of the child, I would say try it.
Who knows but what the marriage relationship may survive the rough patch and somehow come out stronger? The stability of a two-parent home emotionally, financially, logistically, and in intangible ways you won't even realize unless/until you do separate can't be measured. The best and most amicable of divorces has a very negative impact on a child, and most aren't that amicable. Many of the problems you think the separation and/or divorce will solve follow you beyond it; but now these conflicts are compounded with financial issues (most people find themselves much worse off financially after a divorce and it is the cause of many bankruptcies--the custodial parent usually can't afford to keep the same residence which will bring instability and may also create the necessity for a move and change of neighborhood, school, and/or status), and usually the added complications of remarriage and blended families (steps). If you thought it was hard working out holidays before "you ain't seen nothing yet".

I am happily divorced from my ex and even more happily remarried--in some cases you don't have a choice. My kids have turned out remarkably well considering, but I wouldn't go so far as to say they were so resilient that they came out of it unscathed. We all have "baggage" we will carry with us from now on. If there had been any way to make a go of it, I think I would have. Or better yet, if I could have watched enough CSI episodes to have come up with the "perfect crime" (lol)......

Answer 3

i do no longer think of there's a one answer for genuinely anybody. What works for suitable for one couple won't paintings suitable for somebody else. so some distance as no remember if that's ok for the youngsters then that relies upon. That relies upon on in the event that they're able to handle one yet another with admire. in the event that they are able to then i will understand why a pair might stay together for the sake of the youngsters. information that on each and every occasion a divorce occurs the mothers and fathers will see the youngsters decrease than they do now. So the couple ought to place seeing their little ones advance up as much as accessible basically before the different desires they have (together with romantic desires) Been married for 14 years. I even have 2 youthful little ones. we are staying together for the sake of the youngsters. Neither my husband nor i want divide our time with our ladies. And we are respectful of another. So i do no longer think of that's undesirable occasion.

Answer 4

There are a lot of depends on. How old are the kids? How long have you been married? Did you really love each other when you got married? You need to take all this into account. But if you hate each other and fight all the time or even worse have no emotion towards each other it will hurt the kids more than help. Your children deserve to learn what real love is and that wont be learned in a hateful marriage.

Answer 5

Never ever stay married because of a child, you will regret it and so will the child. It is better to come from a broken home than to live in one. The child will feel the unhappiness of both parents and resent them for staying together and being unhappy.

Answer 6

This is tough and depends on the mother and father involved. If they can work out living together not fighting..quarreling and keep a happy environment for the children's sake ...maybe...but..would the mom and dad really be able to place their lives at a stand still in a "no love" situation until the children move out....Divorce then? Children need mom and dad no matter how old they are...so I feel if a marriage is going to break up...let it be now and work out good visitation...spend holidays together. This worked for me and I have great grown kids that didn't have to feel guilty for mom and dad staying in a strained situation for their sake....Trust me kids are smart they know whats going on

Answer 7

I don't believe anyone should stay in a bad marriage for the sake of a child.
Hiding family secrets doesn't make them less painful or save the children from them in the long run.
My mother stayed with my alcoholic and abusive father for years because she wanted to stay together for us. Sadly, as they youngest, by the time I was in my teens all hell was breaking lose. I witnessed physical fights and tons of arguments. I watched my drunken father fall down the stairs and turn blue in the face because he stopped breathing and had to be rushed to an ambulance while screaming obscenities at my mother for calling an ambulance.
In reality, I think that a lot of the stuff that I witnessed only scarred me worse then if they would have been divorced. I lived in an unhappy home with a mother who wanted to commit suicide because she couldn't handle or stand my father who was stealing money for his alcohol and drug use. They didn't think I knew but I heard and witnessed so much more then they thought that really effected me and my lifestyle.
For a long time, I didn't trust men. I still have trust issues because of the household that I was raised in but am learning to get help through therapy.
So in conclusion, staying together for the kids does not always have a good result. I am living proof. I lived through nightmares that were reality, times where I couldn't even get my homework done because the shouting was so loud and overbearing that I couldn't even concentrate, and am proud to say my mother finally got out of that marriage... but of course, I am much older now.. and sometimes I even blame myself for her unhappiness while I was growing up because she stuck around with him for my older sisters and myself.. and it only hurt us and her even worse.

Answer 8

Please don't do it.

Coming from a set of parents who did exactly that, I can tell you from first hand experience that it can hurt your children more than help. You are putting the burden of the relationship on the backs of your children, and that is not fair. Just because you are staying married doesn't mean you won't fight....and when kids hear that kind of stuff, it hurts them more than you can understand.

Just make it a clean break and explain to your children the reason for the divorce, but don't make them the reason you stay together.

Answer 9

Not a good idea. You can't hide unhappiness. Children are very perceptive & will know that something is wrong & that happiness is missing from the home. Two single happier parents are much better than one big miserable family.

Answer 10

You can try and see what happens. The problem is that kids notice everything and if you could both be happy elsewhere and still give the kids good homes and happy homes, they might be better off.