what is your view of women who are raped or molested? Have you ever had a girlfriend who was raped or molested when she was little? Did you try to help her cope with it or did you leave her because you think she's "damaged goods"? Please be as honest as possible. Thank you!
2007-12-10 10:30:47 · 20 answers · asked by Old Soul 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Other - Cultures & Groups
she is not "damaged goods" the road has been long and hard but I would not trade it for anything she is the love of a life and will be until I die... 23 ago she told me the story and yet I still married her ... the person that did that to her is the one that is Damaged not her 22 years tow kids and one grand-kid ... we worked through everything
2007-12-10 10:42:55 · answer #1 · answered by birdman/ninja monkey 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I view them the same as any other woman. If they still have trouble coping with the problem, I would advise them to seek proper counsling, because I am not familiar in the best way to deal with the situation. I don't view them as any worse or any better than a woman that has not been raped or molested.
2007-12-10 18:45:50 · answer #2 · answered by flamespeak 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mmm thats difficult. I have met various women who have been raped and molested and they are rather confused and unable to sustain a relationship with a man.
Sadly if the female in a relationship has been raped it is often her own attitudes which will break the relationship. Firstly she'll blame her partner for not defending her even if he was away say on holiday or not in the place of the assualt. Sex then becomes an issue.
I know only of one of my friends who talks openly about her own assualt and the bf she was with then is her husband now so they worked through the challenges.
2007-12-10 18:37:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Despite my avatar, I am a guy and to answer your question, I've had girlfriends, but I don't know if any of them has been raped as a child. If my next girlfriend did happen to be raped as a child, I would try to help her cope with it if she wants my help on it. I certainly wouldn't leave her because it was no fault of hers. If I did decide to leave her, I'd be an immature, cowardly, sniveling little weasel.
2007-12-10 18:38:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it's an unfortunate event and I can symphatize because it's a really traumatic event especially considering most of their ages. I've had girlfriends that have been in the past and I've tried to help them cope. However, there's a difference between someone who is clearly affected by the event and someone that dictates their life because of that event. It's all a matter of perspective you can look at it like something that's holding your down (this type typically holds everyone accountable for the wrong doings, is it fair to hold your current bf accountable for what happened to you in the past? No, but should he be understanding and empathetic? Of course) or you can look at it like just another step you've had to conquer to be who you are today.
2007-12-10 18:34:31 · answer #5 · answered by jay k 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
they can't help what someone else did to them so, no i wouldn't leave them, honest. yes, i have had 2 girlfriends who were either raped or molested. i tried to be there for them, to listen and to help however i could. the first i wasn't able to help and she left me for an abusive boy who ended up killing her dog with a screwdriver. my neighbors (2 sisters) have both been raped by their fathers (both different fathers, their mother really knew how to pick 'em) and neither of them can become intimate with their boyfriends and they hate sex. i am surrounded by those types of girls but i hope that i can be there to help them. men who leave their GF because of that are wrong to do so. it is a big thing for a guy to handle but still, that just hurts the girl more.
2007-12-10 18:50:13 · answer #6 · answered by Rouxe *(Rue)* 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've never known anyone that was raped or molested, but I think it is sick. I can't believe anyone would rape another person, it hurts them physically and mentally, most people never overcome it. I would NEVER think someone who was molested or raped would be "damaged goods." Anyone who commits rape or molestation deserves to rot in jail.
2007-12-10 18:37:12 · answer #7 · answered by Veracity 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Men aren't going to look at a woman who has been raped or molested as "damaged goods"
The only thing to concern a guy about it is....
"Is she going have a lack of trust in me? Is she going to be physically disinterested in me and sex because of that?"
If you can answer no to those questions, there's nothing to worry about. If you answered yes, seek some counseling until the answer is no.
2007-12-10 18:36:45 · answer #8 · answered by sean24seven 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
never come across it, personally, but i dont think the concept of damaged goods would come into it. that just seems wrong, and punishing the victim,
and all these people, that wan't to know the "answer" to this, there won't be one, obviously it is a case by case, person by person scenario, and in reality, anything could happen, depsite what the majority will say on here.
and this would work both ways, what about "damaged" boys?.. would you tolerate them?.. or move straight past?....
2007-12-10 18:33:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Thankfully I've not known anyone who's been raped, but if I did I certainly wouldn't see them as 'damaged goods'. I'd be as sympathetic and caring as I knew how. I'm sure most men feel them same, and any who don't aren't worth your time.
2007-12-10 18:34:55 · answer #10 · answered by Luke B 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋