My wife and I have been having trouble lately,she wants freedom, independance ,has said she hates her life doesnt want to be married or be a mum kept telling me she was moving out,said I had done nothing wrong she had just grown, we are seeing a councilior she has resolved some issues but last night I told her whilst at the councilor that I was scared because I was starting to love her less and that Im afraid it could just keep going this was said at the councilor now she is being cold to me did I say the wrong thing or was being honest wright
2007-12-10 08:46:58 · 12 answers · asked by finally solo35 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
the past two weeks have been ok it like times of old but after the councilor I think we have gone backwards
2007-12-10 08:57:48 · update #1
my love is unconditional for her Its just being told things you start to rethink your feelings, she wants to work it out and says she still loves me
2007-12-10 09:00:26 · update #2
No, rejection will do that to a person. She was cold to begin with and now she has to live with the decision that she has made.....
Maybe it will wake her up and see the damage that she is doing.
She hasn't grown because Love doesn't die.....LOVE GROWS!!!!
2007-12-10 08:51:07 · answer #1 · answered by Been There Done That 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were being HONEST and sorry to inconvenience her but her ACTIONS are HURTING you and changing the status and strength of the love you have for her and the security you feel for your future, with her or alone! I mean, she has to face NOW the facts that she is not going to just have HER WAY with no consequences! Continue to be honest with her. Good for you. My family is doing the counselling thing too and full disclosure is vital for growth, progress, healing and making the CORRECT choices. You never say the wrong thing if you say it
1. Honestly
2. Out of a loving heart
3. Soon as opposed to letting bitterness and resentment build.
Praying for marriages. Peace.
2007-12-10 16:59:08 · answer #2 · answered by Sleek 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honesty is the best policy. Say what you feel. She is pushing you to feel that way by acting the way she has been acting. I believe you need to do what you can to make a marriage work, but some people just aren't mature enough to handle it. It sounds to me like your wife is not the one who has grown. If she had, then she would want to be a wife and mother more than anything in this world.
2007-12-10 16:52:00 · answer #3 · answered by ~nicole~ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wife has not grown at all. Not if she has children. You just dont leave. My husband did that to me and my boys. He said he just did not want resposibility anymore. Nice huh? Acareer marine also! Hasnt seen his boys in over 10 years. Let her go find herself. You sound like a good man who loves her. Trust me theres not alot of guys out there who even want to be married anymore. She doesnt see what she has but, the grass is not allways greener on the other side. Write if you need someone to talk to. It always helps to make new friends. SUSAN
2007-12-10 17:05:41 · answer #4 · answered by Sansue 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you expressed your feeling the same way she did. Sometimes people do grow apart and maybe this is what has happened to you and your wife. If you have to try to separate on good terms so the children can still have somewhat security that mom and dad are still civil towards each other.
2007-12-10 16:52:26 · answer #5 · answered by annita g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude, she doesn't love you anymore. Likely there's someone else. Whatever the reason give her what she wants. Set her free. Do talk to an attorney and file for divorce. Make sure that she understands that she'll be paying you child support. Good luck.
2007-12-10 16:53:30 · answer #6 · answered by Poppy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's easy to fall out of love but it takes perseverence & a ton of patience to maintain love when things aren't so honky-dory.
After 10 years of marriage, we've had our share of "i luv u and i luv you nots!" As a matter of fact, we've been separated by law & by land....and had our share of "extramarital affairs" during the marriage, but to be truthful, the only thing that really keeps us fighting to make it last is our individual love for GOD and faith that HE can & HE will see us through whatever we're going thru.
My husband during our marriage has been seen as a brother and a friend for periods of times before the romance returned making him my lover and companion. Among other roles, naturally.
Truth is real love is unconditional, it finds a way to forgive despite, and is willing to fight thru the last fight...............if you really love her, it would be inspite of the "chaos and confusion" because you know that there is none other better than she for you.... But, once again, that kinda mindset requires REAL & EXTREME faith!
2007-12-10 16:57:25 · answer #7 · answered by 4everFaithful 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the only thing you can do is give it time and time will always tell get into a good church too and make sure you don't cheat cause if things work out for you. you don't want to end up sorry later. good luck.
2007-12-10 16:51:46 · answer #8 · answered by daisy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Right-better to be honest-maybe the truth hurt her feelings but she needed to hear it!
2007-12-10 16:50:05 · answer #9 · answered by Lunaeclipz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She didn't think about hurting your feelings, did she now? You spoke the truth and sometimes the truth hurts.
2007-12-10 16:51:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋