If your spouse cheated on you but ya'll have been through too much to just throw it all away..is it ok to do it back to him/her?? or should you just give up on him/her??
2007-12-10 07:08:38 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's not okay to cheat, ever. Two wrongs don't make a right--it will only make things worse. You also don't have to give up on your spouse. There's a third choice here. If you have enough else that's good and strong in your marriage, and you want to stay together, then you can both work on rebuilding the relationship. I imagine that's not easy, but it's possible if you both want to badly enough.
2007-12-10 07:32:03 · answer #1 · answered by Trivial One 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
It is his actions and behaviors, he has free will just like everyone else on the planet, I blamed him. I also do not excuse the married woman he had the affair with, or his parents for raising such an immoral person, but I also blame the Catholic Church, they allowed the divorce, and granted him an annulment, despite his having an affair with a married woman, he is allowed to get married again in the Catholic Church and destroy another life. He gets the blame, but that doesn't mean the others are so innocent too. His parents raised him that lying was allowed, and cheating was allowed, and his church raised him to be the abuser he is. I think God holds us all accountable for our actions and behaviors, but he holds people accountable for what they don't do too. God is going to hold the Diocese of Dallas accountable for this divorce and annulment, they are just as guilty.
2016-05-22 21:38:19 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if it's too much to throw away, then you need to either forgive it or move on. Getting back at him/her in any way isn't going to make you feel any better. I wouldn't give up on the person--I would do everything I could to make it work. Of course, this would be after a bit of time that I'd had to process it.
2007-12-10 08:49:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You're joking, right?
Betrayal is the dealbuster in marriage. And if marriage is respect, admiration, passion and trust, the trust is gone, with the passion getting shared, so unless you are as stupid as a sack of rocks, there is no admiration or respect for your spouse.... you are just roommates with boinking benefits.
This isn't really a marriage, it is a convenience. And that may be fine for you.... as my dad once said, "A divorce is a nice thing if you can afford it." Lots of people can't. Sooooo the real question is: Is this all you think you deserve? If you stay, it is. If you leave, you have a chance to find a faithful partner..... and all of us who are wonderful (and that IS all of us) deserve a faithful partner.
2007-12-10 07:24:42 · answer #4 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If you're going to stay in the relationship get even because your partner needs to feel the pain it's caused you, once they feel how bad it hurts it just might be enough to keep them from cheating again... Revenge is bitter SWEET!!
2007-12-10 07:17:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Only you can decide that... There are plenty of people who make a relationship work after someone cheated... I have a friend whose husband cheated, she confronted him and gave him a choice and told him that what ever choice he made me needed to stick with and he chose her... It's changed their relationship in a good way, she says he's a different man than he was before it happened and here they are 8 years later and he's never cheated again...
2007-12-10 07:16:46 · answer #6 · answered by mrskerlin 4 · 0⤊ 4⤋
i think that people are human and make mistakes. i believe in second chances. however, i do not believe in third chances. cheating once is a mistake, after that, it's a habit. however, do not forgive and want to stay with someone because you have been through a lot together. stay because you love them and want to stay in your marriage.
2007-12-10 07:24:44 · answer #7 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I would leave because if you stay they will continue to cheat. Getting even would be childish it has no point.
2007-12-10 07:53:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Revenge NEVER works and is an immature way to address anything in a marriage or life, for that matter. I personally could never forgive a cheater....ever.
2007-12-10 07:13:07 · answer #9 · answered by that judi 6 · 1⤊ 4⤋
he will need to live with what his actions where, dont fall into the trap where you do it for revenge because then you will need to live with it too. the hurt from his actions wont go away by hurting him back. good luck
2007-12-10 07:31:19 · answer #10 · answered by xx 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋