Do you have any of these disorders?

Question

Normal Human Experience Now Masqueraded as “Disorders”

Do you have difficulty sleeping after drinking coffee? The problem isn’t a product of your poor judgment in guzzling java immediately before retiring. You are a victim of 292.89 -- Caffeine-Induced Sleep Disorder F15.8. If you reflect on your shyness while tossing and turning, the problem could be the epidemic of 300.23 -- Social Phobia F40.1. Don’t worry. Drug treatment is available.

Unfortunately, if you’re thinking about your place in the cosmos or spiritual issues, you’ve got V62.89 -- Religious or Spiritual Problem Z71.8, and I couldn’t locate a drug for that.

Bad parenting is about to become a thing of the past. It’s not your fault, or your child’s fault. Besides the ubiquitous pandemic of ADHD, there are other disorders you may not be aware of.

Your ill-behaving child may be suffering from 313.81 -- Oppositional Defiant Disorder F91.3. If your child often argues with adults, loses their temper, deliberately annoys people, etc., you’re dealing with ODD. Of course, this must be differentiated from 312.8 -- Conduct Disorder F91.8, and 312.9 -- Disruptive Behavior Disorder Not Otherwise Specified F91.9.

Should the problem be getting along with a brother or sister, the condition is V61.8 -- Sibling Relational Problem F93.3. And should you argue with your spouse about whether the child should be grounded or drugged, you might be looking down the barrel of V61.1 -- Partner Relational Problem Z63.0.

If math homework is a challenge, be sure to check for 315.1 -- Mathematics Disorder F81.2. You must be careful not to confuse this with a V62.3 -- Academic Problem Z55.8. If things are OK in the math department, but you have a teen experiencing uncertainty about life goals, career preferences, values, loyalties, etc., you’re dealing with 313.82 Identity Problem F93.8. This has been downgraded from a “disorder” in DSM-III-R, to a mere “problem” in DSM-IV. I’ll bet that makes you feel better

Answer 1

I suffer from 302.4

Answer 2

Aint it amazin'? NOTHING is our fault anymore.
My step-grandson was diagnosed with a mild form of autism, and his parents are looking into all kinds of treatment for him, when what they really need to do is stop letting him drink sodas, especially diet ones, and have him eat a more natural diet instead of all the processed crap they let him have. And not so many toys. Birthdays and Christmas, both he and his brother have stuff HEAPED onto them. It's no wonder their behavior is out of control.

Answer 3

I love the DSM IV! I have often referred to it for may of mimi's questions. I have allot of these conditions especially ADHD & ODD.

Answer 4

There are way too many disorders out there and they are only there to steal your money with some random pill that probably does not do anything special.

Answer 5

lol, I think this is absolutely hilarious!
You are right, I think it is so crazy that people can't deal with their children, self, and relationships like people did 50 years ago. Everyone wants to find a drug to fix a problem, so that they can't blame themselves and they label themselves with a disorder. This is absolutely hilarious. Thanks!

Answer 6

what's the disorder for being so bored at work all the time that you can't find anything better to do than ask and answer questions on Yahoo Answers?

Answer 7

Drugs arent the answer to all lifes problems. Sounds like a bunch of crap to me buddy

Answer 8

I have "I'm a lazy muther fukka disorder, and think i'm above working hard for the money" disorder.
Do you have a drug for that?

Answer 9

LOL! Amen Speak on it Rev. Ron! Can I get a witness!!

Answer 10

I drink coffee morning & night & no I don't have trouble sleeping-I have trouble trying to stay awake!!!