Just need to know how it went for you and if you ever realized that you did love the person that you have been married to. What was the outcome? Did you get a divorce or did you experience regret? Did the person that you thought you fell out of love with meet someone else and did that affect you? Or if you are the person who fell out of love, did you meet someone only to regret leaving your husband or wife in the long run? Or were you just happy wht the enw person? If you have experienced this...wether you were the one who fell out of love or you were the person who your spouse left because they fell out of love, I would appreciate your answer. Thanks!
2007-12-10 00:29:55 · 7 answers · asked by Javi 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My first husband, the infatuation wore off within the first few years of our marriage. At the time, I was all gung ho... til death do us part, however, he became involved in a lifestyle of sex, drugs and rock-n-roll. Literally! I began to suspect and looking back I realize that was the moment my feelings began to change. When my suspicions were proven to be correct, all "love" was gone and it gradually became ugly. Still, I was gung ho, stay in the marriage until the arguments turned violent. I had to get out then. It took him 24 hours to have another woman move in with him and I hadn't even filed for the divorce yet. I wasn't hurt... I was angry because I felt like somehow all those years I had invested in him were a waste. I knew I no longer loved him but I believed he should have suffered somehow. I got over it. Lucky for me I denied him visitation and won so he was never involved in my life after that. It still took a long time for me to get over it enough to trust another man.
I met someone who was the total opposite of my husband and I really tried to love him. I just couldn't in the way that he deserved. We had no common anything and I felt guilty because he truly was a good man and a good friend. I just did not feel romantic with him. We went our separate ways and eventually lost contact with each other.
A few years later, my second husband stormed into my life. It was fireworks. I never felt more alive than when I was with him. I loved him.. really really loved him. Unfortunately, I being an alcoholic, did not devote what I should have to the relationship and he had this thing with porn and young girls. It broke my heart when I found out, yet still I loved him. One night it just got really ugly and no matter how much I loved him, I could not forgive him. I filed for a divorce and went into rehab with the impression that perhaps someday I could forgive him and we would work things out. That day never would come... he committed suicide. I could drown myself in the what ifs but it gets me nowhere.
I turned to a friend and gradually started to fall in love. It wasn't the duty kind of love I had with my first husband and it wasn't the fireworks I had with my second. It is pure comfort and real down to earth happiness. When I am experiencing issues of the past, I can talk honestly with him and know I will get honesty in return. He is my best friend and a true love. He is everything gentle but strong and he really listens and values what I have to say.
I have felt temporary regrets over my lifetime. Temporary! I just learned to open my eyes to the good that surrounds my life now and stopped living in the past with should haves and could haves, because the truth of the matter is no matter what you or I do, the past is the past and that is where it belongs. It's like driving a car.. do you watch where you are going or do you keep your eyes on the rear view mirror looking at where you've been.
I glance back from time to time, but that is all. I tell myself if I am going to do something, then it is worth giving my all, no matter what it is! It takes discipline to be honest with yourself. If my second husband had not died, I honestly do not believe I would have taken him back. There just was no trust.
2007-12-10 01:40:22 · answer #1 · answered by peggy m 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First marriage yes, though I wouldn't say that I actually fell out of love with him. We just wanted different lives at the time. I can't say that I actually regret not being married to him anymore. Though I do wander if things would have gotten better since eventually we did want the same things out of life...just a 10 year gap to get there. When we talk to catch up we still say I love yous. And we wish each other the very best.
Second marriage, the man made it impossible to love him as well as tried to destroy the love I have for myself...no regrets whats so ever and I encouraged him to meet someone else. Anything to get his psycho @ss to move on and leave me alone.
2007-12-10 00:47:37 · answer #2 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At moment's we've all been there I think. And at one point we talked separation but both wimped out of it. I think when it got to that point we realized we were just stressing, lashed out at each other and let's get on with the real issue. Which at that time was the loss of our son, a job loss and a bankruptcy. We thought we'd take the easy route and divorce. I'm so happy we didn't b/c we're more in love now than I think we were even when we married b/c we both matured.
2007-12-10 00:34:37 · answer #3 · answered by Yummy♥Mummy 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I am falling out of love... there is no third person in the picture though, just boredom, and broken dreams. I wonder what that is? Maybe I did it to myself somehow - convinced myself wrong?
2007-12-10 01:09:40 · answer #4 · answered by dexter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, love did end and so did the marriage.
It happens...most things that have a beginning, have an ending (even love).
2007-12-10 00:33:05 · answer #5 · answered by . 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have not experiecenced this, but im sorry and i wish you luck.
2007-12-10 00:35:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, it happens
2007-12-10 00:44:08 · answer #7 · answered by panamarandy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋