She said she is too busy. She said, "please, please don't come home for Christmas" after I said "I'll be home for Christmas." What would you do? Should I be a little sad? Should I be angry? Or is this a little funny because my family is so abnormal? And how meaningful are the holidays really? Is it just like any other day for some, plus for how many do you think it is just another day? In my family, there is Mom and Grandma, they live together. I am in California and Mom is in Michigan. I do not have much communication with Dad. I didn't see Mom last Christmas either, nor for Thanksgivings. I last went back in July. Thanks.
2007-12-09 15:42:25 · 9 answers · asked by August lmagination 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Christmas
Every family is different. Does your family not celebrate Christmas? What I don't understand is why a mother would not want to see her child regardless of Christmas? TOO busy to see your kid is abnormal!! I would think a mother would be happy to know you are coming any time of the year. My questions would be
1. Does she think that you can't afford the flight?
2. Is she planning on surprising you?
I would be a bit thrown off if my mother said that to me and I would feel somewhat rejected. However Christmas is a very big deal in my family and we are close knit. Some families are not like that so it can't be compared.
All I can say that if you feel this was an unacceptable response from her you need to talk to her. Tell her that it hurt you that you were not welcomed home for Christmas? Ask why she would not want to see you and what is she so busy doing that she can't make time for her kid? Is there a better time of year to visit? If Christmas doesn't work for her then when would?
2007-12-09 16:10:34 · answer #1 · answered by Violet 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Advice, I have aplenty! Cut that man loose. He claims your mother disrespected him by renting out a basement in HER house?? He's a controlling jerk. He does not own you or your mother. And he dang sure doesn't own her house! You can't make things better. He's angry over things that are not his business. He isn't married to you, he only dates you. He's mad about the new tenant who is your age, because he's afraid you might see what a slime he really is. He thinks he lose his hold on you if you start seeing the man living downstairs AS a man who might just treat YOU better and do everything YOU want, asks, and say. By doing everything he says, asks, and tells you to do,. you are not his girlfriend, you're his puppet. And he likes that. Your relationship does not sound like one of love, but control, and he has every bit of it. A man that "hates" your mother is NOT the man for you dear, after all you come from your mother, you wouldn't be you if it hadn't been for her!
2016-05-22 10:17:50 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so u r confused and puzzled why Ur mom is not calling u 4 Christmas at home.u dint get angry,but ask her calmly what the matter at home if there is any problem to speak and u could see if u can help out in this.be in contact with her every now n then and show u r concerned about her n the family.try it out .n waiting for u reply with a with a positive outcome.all the best n i know u are capable of tackling the problem.all the best.
2007-12-09 16:07:57 · answer #3 · answered by uly 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know, it could be a number of things. The first things that spring to mind is that maybe she feels her life is in a disarray right now and she doesn't want you to see that. Or if that is the case, she isn't emotionally capable of having family (or I guess you?) come over for Christmas. She might be having like a nervous breakdown or something.
It's nice you are able to handle it so breezily... If you aren't hurt then there is no reason to be hurt! Do whatever you want, you could even spend it with friends.
2007-12-09 15:48:45 · answer #4 · answered by jengrenade 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's horrible that your mom said that to you!!! Most moms would be thrilled to see their kids ANYTIME! You live so far away too. My advice to you is to find another way to spend the holidays...doing something you want to do...or better yet...donate time to do volunteer work at a shelter or food bank. The people there will be so happy that you're there and will be thankful and appreciate you far more than your mom seems to at this time. There will come a time when your mom will want you to visit, or will want to visit you...maybe you should tell he "No, I'm too busy"...she would deserve it
2007-12-09 15:49:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, as we haven't talked to my Mother in law in 6 months after she told us she wanted nothing to do with my husband and I, I don't think I am entitled to make judgements about your family's abnormality......I think it is sad and I hate it for you.....maybe you could offer to help her out or pay for a cleaning service or offer to cook everything.....or just go after the holidays if christmas doesn't mean that much to her. good luck!!
2007-12-09 15:49:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
K that is mean I would be angry if I were you. Sounds like your mom wants nothing to do with you.That does not sound like a good or kind mom at all. I fell sorry for you
2007-12-09 17:06:21 · answer #7 · answered by Courtbrat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever your Mom's reasons are, respect them- & DON'T take them personally. And if I were in YOUR position, I would WAIT until your Mom invites you home again... Obviously there's something "going on" with her- & she needs to deal with it in her OWN way. Give Her time, & get on with YOUR Life... She'll get back to you...-Count on it!
2007-12-09 15:56:54 · answer #8 · answered by Joseph, II 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow Im sorry, not really much you can do about that situation except make the best of your holiday season without your mom.
2007-12-09 15:46:42 · answer #9 · answered by that hot chick 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋