What are three things that make you feel fulfilled?

Question

After you list those three things, consider this: If one or more of the things that fulfills you is one of the things that makes someone else sick to their stomach, would you think there was something wrong with them?

You realize, of course, that I meant "sick to their stomach" figuratively. Either way, isn't it possible that someone could never want to be a mother and be happy with that?

I said fulfilled, not full.

I ask questions on other forums here and there. I'm just working in the interests of point conservation.

Answer 1

Rio you posted a question!!! (I don't remember you ever posting one as long as I've been here.) So I'm going to try my best to answer it!

Let's see...three things that make me feel fulfilled...well, my kids (my love for them, and theirs for me) would definitely be one, my pursuit of a college education (intellectual stimulation), and my spiritual values and beliefs (giving something back to society).

EDIT: I get the feeling that someone must have criticized some decision (about motherhood) that you have made? Perhaps the person who criticized you believes that because you are so young, you "know not what you may miss." It's up to you to decide what you want to do with your life. If having kids is not what you want, there is nothing wrong with that decision. Plenty of kids are being born every day to people who do not really want them, or to people who are not ready to be parents. I think it's wonderful that you are insightful enough at your age to consider how you really feel about parenthood. Parenthood isn't right for everyone. I say ignore the criticism. You're a smart girl. You are leaps and bounds ahead of where most people are at your age. Your choices (as you have rightly surmised) are your own to make. Do what's best for you, and don't worry about what other people think. They aren't the ones who live your life, YOU are.

Now if any of those things (above) repels or disgusts someone else, I'm not sure what I'd think. I suppose I would think that that person is much different than I. I might be tempted to feel sorry for that person. But I realize that's somewhat an arrogant view to take...I mean, what makes me happy won't necessarily make others happy. What I value might not be what someone else values. And who am I to decide what's best for everyone? But it's tempting to think that what makes us happy will make someone else happy. The fact is, though, that this is not always true. I say live and let live. Unless that other person's actions are harming me (or others) somehow, I wouldn't necessarily think that there's something wrong with them.

Answer 2

1. Making chocolate chip cookies for my husband
2. A clean house
3. A loving husband.

(these aren't the only things, btw, and they aren't necessarily the top three, either. It's just what I felt at a particular moment).

Hopefully the chocolate chip cookies don't make my hubby sick to his stomach. Other than that I would say that if any of those things I listed makes somebody sick to their stomach they shouldn't eat it.

Edit: Yes, it is possible that a woman can never want to be a mother and still be fulfilled. I do not have any children and likely won't due to infertility. I am 100% okay with that.
I love taking care of my husband and have a fabulously clean house and a pretty garden. On the other hand, my sister has three kids and she is miserable.

Answer 3

Being a good friend, being with my boyfriend, doing something to help someone else. If I just make the world a little bit better, my life is fulfilled. I wouldn't think there was something wrong with them if they didn't agree. Our differences are what unite us as the human race. Differences make the world a diverse place. It is possible for a woman not to want to have any kids and be fulfilled. We all make choices that impact our lives. If that is what they want, it is fine.

Answer 4

The 3 things that make me feel fulfilled : Good social relationships, meaning (on whatever I do) and a goal.
But you see this 3 things aren't really things, they are open and that's what I love about it.
If you ask yourself is not wanting children the best choice, is it possible to have a fulfilling life? Yep it is your choice and it is what you want NOW. In 5 years your life will be totally different and maybe you'll have to review your decision. That is freedom, it is your life and the one responsible for your life is YOU. Make decisions, enjoy your choices, have fun and live in peace.

Answer 5

Oh you poor thing! I can relate! I don't have a family either. I do, but I am kind of in the same situation. I can tell you one thing that helped me, you are going to have to get a relationship with God. I would suggest that you go to church, like an assembly of God church, or something that has real people and not a bunch of religious nuts. They will befriend you, support you, give you a sense of family, and help you realize that the one who created you is the one who loves you the most, and with him backing you up, everything else in your life will fall into place. I have adopted several friends and made them my siblings. That helps me so much, but with your responsibilities, it must be hard to take the time to get to know people. That is why the church could help. They could get to know your needs, and then help you get some relief. There will always be an emptiness inside without family, the resentment and hurt is something that is really hard to deal with, and I absolutely know how you feel. Strive to do your best for your family, and ask God for help. He always answers, all you have to do is ask. He loves you very much. Just ask him! I hope you will!

Answer 6

Being a mother; being a teacher; being a friend. I couldn't imagine anyone getting sick over that, so yes, I would definitely think there was something wrong with them.

Edit: Rio-a woman may make the choice early on to not have children, and that's her preogative. I will never know how different my life would be if I were not a mother, just as a woman who chooses to not have children will never know how her life would change with children. We can't experience the choice we opted to not take. So, yes, a woman can be, and has to be happy with whatever choice she makes because not one of us gets to go back and change anything.

Answer 7

1) Cheering somebody up that is having a rough go of things
2) The love of my family and friends and the love I give in return.
3) Having my writing published. I'm currently writing a sci-fi novel. Writing is my first love. For years this love has been woefully neglected.

I wouldn't think less of anyone that didn't agree with my list. To each their own.

Answer 8

my religion, my family, and a clean house. the latter, sadly, sometimes excites me the most right now. my youngest two of four kids are almost 2 and almost 3 and are the busiest children ever. after the very occasional event of getting my house clean, i take a few moments to admire it(almost tearfully) then i grab all the kids and LEAVE! only coming home at night. for like 3 days.

Answer 9

1. The love of my family.
2. Committing random acts of kindness.
3. Problem solving.

Answer 10

1. A good night's sleep.

2. Knowing that my family is healthy and safe.

3. Knowing that I can afford to pay the bills.