Anyone else feel absolutely sickened by the thought of some smug marriage with a big white wedding and kids?
2007-12-09 12:06:26 · 22 answers · asked by Robin 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
God I feel so sick reading all those questions in the pregnancy section aswell (nothing against the people who ask them though).
I think I'm just a bitter lemon.
2007-12-09 12:07:38 · update #1
Maybe, Faithfull is still young enough to have a choice and hasn't been confronted with truth.
The papers that come with marriage mean, little, raising kids through the stages of life that we all go through is overrated, at best! Having a big house to keep clean, insured, maintained then upgraded can be challenging.
Maintaining an automobile to carry all those kids to school and doctors appointments can be a, study in frustration.
As bad as things can get, in a few years you're going to be attracted to this lifestyle, with all its challenges and frustrations, along with the mediocrity.
Because, without the bad times or kids, you won't appreciate the good times.
Its called "LIFE", something that will only be learned too late, when all you'll have is a house full of kids, a guy watching football on pirated cable.
you'll have kids, that spend more time running in the neighborhood, because they don't care and girls that will have sex with any guy as long as mom pays the bill.
Good Luck!
Go Figure!
2007-12-09 12:39:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Marriage and the marriage ceremony are two entirely seperate things.
To me, marriage is a public sign of commitment to each other. since we have no fault divorce,it isn't that much of a problem to get out of ether. There is only the complication of child support to worry about, but that applies whether you are married or not.
If you do not like the obscence waste and spectacle that most marriages are these day, or so I am lead to believe, then there is always a registry office and small close group afterwards, or a small church affair and quiet party afterwards.
My wife and I only had 20 people to our wedding because that is all we wanted.
hint, to make marriage work, talk explicity about what both of you want before you get married. The problems happen when you both have different expectations.
2007-12-09 20:20:00 · answer #2 · answered by Terryc 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I have to tend to agree with you ~ at times.
Years ago, I went to a wedding and listened to two people exchanging their vows ~ whilst probably knowing more about theses two people than the rest did put together.
The deceits and the outward sham of it had me feeling so depressed.
I used to sing in a church choir and sat through a number of weddings and listened to the couples exchanging their vows, and it occurred to me to wonder one day, 'How could people PROMISE to Love one another?' (as the ceremony vows were laid out then).
What did they KNOW that I as a 16 year didn't? And I assumed that one day someone would let me in on this and I'd go through some 'right-of-passage.'
They didn't, I didn't and I'm still wondering about what to me is either a naivety, a foolishness or an arrogantly stupidity or plain smugness.
Sash.
2007-12-09 21:15:31 · answer #3 · answered by sashtou 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OMG...and I thought I was the only one. I never in my life, even as a young girl growing up, gave two craps about getting married or a wedding and all that responsibility. I'm 33, engaged, and not doing a thing. In about two years, I may elope with him (if we are still together). I find it bizarre when women talk about that stuff like it's the be all and end all of life. But I know...I'm the strange one, supposedly.
2007-12-10 00:11:06 · answer #4 · answered by lovebird 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You know, I don't feel sickened by it..but it isn't my cup of tea. We've all have our views of a "traditional" wedding molded into something that isn't necessarily traditional. Whatever your tradition is..is what a traditional wedding should be.
I went to a wedding where the bride and groom wore swim suits. Afterwards, everyone celebrated their union on the beach. It was really nice.
2007-12-09 20:29:37 · answer #5 · answered by Talkstress 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey robin, it's Daniel Craig here... I understand you're a bit unhappy about white weddings and kids... well so am I! It's OK to feel like that... now be a good girl and fetch me a vodka Martini and I'll get busy on the Chemin de Fer... you bring me luck (winks mischievously).
2007-12-09 20:18:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes I feel sickened by marriage. Only because I am in a very bad one. I have learned that I will probable never know anyone for sure. But, you need to be free and move at your own pace and decide for yourself for now just relax.
2007-12-09 20:13:35 · answer #7 · answered by jalwells 2 · 4⤊ 1⤋
I am with you though it is personal choice. I am 37 have been proposed to a few times and the thought of it scares me to be honest. Even a partner I was with for 11 years didn't tempt me (and that relationship lasted longer than a good few of my friends marriages too.)
2007-12-09 20:13:03 · answer #8 · answered by ¸.•*´`*♥Kates ♥ Game11 ¸.•*´`*♥ 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
you have the right to feel sickened about the thought of marriage because you hear lots and lots of people getting divorces after they get married and I felt sickened of getting married to.even though I have 3 kids and I had a divorce with my ex husband because he was controlling.I dont blame you for the way you feel.
2007-12-09 20:13:24 · answer #9 · answered by lynn e 2 · 4⤊ 1⤋
I think you're right - you are a bitter lemon. Maybe you should undergo counseling to figure out why. Hopefully things will get better for you.
2007-12-09 20:10:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋