LONG STORY get ready...
well my bff, justin since pre k has a son, ashtin whos mother left him wen he was 3 months and i was always over and helping justin wit ashtin. and then wen ashtin started he called me mommy and in ways i was his mother i mean i helped raise him and i love him more than life itself (no joke) i would take a bullet for that kid i love him so much. and now he is 1 and a 1/2 and his mother is back and living with him and i go and c him 1 a week (which is less than b4 his mom came back) so idk if it is a sign 2 back off and idk if i should let his mom, ashley b his mom and i should let them b a family. ik it would b hard and i love him so much that if that is wat i have to do to make him happy and have a normal family than i will do it. im just rlly confused and dont kno wat to do and i will do watever is best 4 him no matter how much it hurts me.
2007-12-09 05:26:44 · 9 answers · asked by HelpHelp 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
and thanx 4 the spelling shot!
i am using im talk and i prob spelled stuff wrong cuz im dyslexic so watch wat u say 2 ppl if u dont kno them.
2007-12-10 08:42:29 · update #1
There is no reason why you still can't be part of his life. He still needs you. How do you know his mother won't take off again? Maybe for the mothers sake, try to get him to call you something else like nanna or something, or else she might turn on you and then you won't be part of his life at all. You were an important part of Ashtin's life and still can be. Be proud of the person you are. You have made a difference in a kid's life, and that is more important than most things in life.
2007-12-09 05:34:24 · answer #1 · answered by lars 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't stop loving that kid you don't know what is down the road, you don't say why the mother disappeared for a period of time, if she is trying to become a better person, help her do it, she may need some help...
You can still be around as a support to her and make it clear that you can be trusted with her son, that you care deeply for him and make friends and let him call you auntie instead of mom he is young you tell him you are his auntie not mommy and reassure him of who mommy is, he is only 1.5 yrs so slowly he will figure it out, this way you will become part of his life if your friend doesn't feel threatened by how much you already know about her son that she may not...good luck
2007-12-09 05:38:41 · answer #2 · answered by Neptune2bsure 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs bonding time with Mommy, that is for sure. But who is Mommy, really? And for you to be there during the most critical bonding time, I would say that you should always be a part of the child's life. 'New' biological Mommy might be back, but she has lots of time to make up for. If you are only seeing him once a week, that's perfect. If you were out of his life completely, he would only be more confused and unstable with the fact that his 'Mommy' is home after all this time. Good luck and what is best for him is that this woman makes up her mind, and you never ever leave his side. He has grown with you there, and will want you to be there with him always. Don't confuse the little guy, continue seeing him, but let him attempt to bond with new Mommy, too. You are not intruding, you are doing what's best for baby.
2007-12-09 05:41:16 · answer #3 · answered by Preggers Again! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I was in high school I called my best friend's parents mom and dad-- I just spent so much time there it seemed natural. Now I know this is different, but it's not that different. He needs to know you're not biologically his mom, but you still care for him like a son and he should know that too. Odds are the mom is going to leave again at some point and you're gonna be back in the mom role, so be prepared for that. as of right now you're in the role of the really close aunt, which is fine. Most kids like their close aunts better than their mom's anyway! It's like Full house in your house, except you don't live there.
2007-12-17 02:03:08 · answer #4 · answered by Suliah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should try to let him and his mother form a relationship, but just because she's back in the picture doesn't mean that you can't be in his life either. and because she was gone for so long it would probably be good for you to continue to stay in his life just in case she decides to up and leave again... i'm a mommy and i could never even think about just leaving my baby, so if she did it once, whose to say she won't again. and if she does than you should be there for him and at least he will still have a female in his life that he is use to and comfortable with.
2007-12-09 05:38:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry i don't comprehend what u . s . a . you reside in so this answer applies to uk. to grant you a viewpoint from a Social artwork and criminal attitude (I even have placed why that's proper to in brackets) a toddler is defined as a individual below the age of 18 below the youngsters Act 1989. (you're 15 and your brother is 17) below s.17.a million(a) of the youngsters Act 1989, interior reach government have a accountability to ‘look after and sell the welfare of youngsters interior their section who're in choose’. (As in you being a toddler in choose of help and the council have a accountability to be sure you're risk-free) (below this regulation the council can boost their help to kin individuals, alongside with mom and pa. This help would be interior the form of Social amenities) Social amenities will do an assessment on your loved ones to be sure what is going on, which will contain talking to mom, dad, brothers, instructors, you etc My own opinion: The slapping incident, notwithstanding if that's a one off isn't info of actual abuse. This with your mom's approach might desire to coach that she might desire to have dissimilar rigidity in her existence. this may lead directly to her taking it out on you which of them makes you sense suicidal, as you're a teenager who continues to be transforming into up. As a teenager, you nevertheless are researching to handle thoughts which you have and persons around you direct at you. This with the indisputable fact which you will no longer flow out, makes you sense caged in. i'm slightly prepared approximately Peter shifting in because of the fact the situation at residing house isn't stable adequate which you will stay in without somebody new entering the photograph. additionally the fact your mom is letting an unknown person flow in with 2 toddlers (sure toddlers, even on the an prolonged time of 15 and 17) without you attending to comprehend him first is slightly alarming, the lodger interior the toddler P case is composed of strategies. no longer that i'm announcing he's a intercourse criminal, however the possibility continues to be there. the ingredient to submit is, talk to Social amenities as you're vulnerable and that they have a criminal accountability to guard you. they do no longer seem to be evil, they're right here that can assist you you.
2016-10-01 05:45:34 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a hard situation. What does the father think? You don't have to leave his life altogether. It wouldn't be fair on the lil guy to stop seeing him at all.
2007-12-09 05:51:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow thats really hard the right thing to do is back off and let im and his mum bond. it will be hard for you but it is the right thing to do.
2007-12-09 05:32:07 · answer #8 · answered by kim s 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends, can she spell better than you? Does she understand the basic rules of grammar?
2007-12-09 05:34:12 · answer #9 · answered by littleJaina 4 · 1⤊ 6⤋