and know its the right choice i made for me and kids..how do i know im not blinded by the stupid insecurity of our trust issue..how do i know that he is telling me the truth..i believe the truth always comes out on way or the other..how can i trust again..how can i let him see he can trust me..that he is the only man i want that i will only be truely happy with him(if he is being honest)..it seems wot im doing is not working and ive asked and he says he cnt tel me..how do i break away from him when everything in my mind body heart tels me not to..how can we help each other to believe in each other again..how can i make him feel save and at ease to talk to me without fearing the worse..how do i stop feelingso helpless and show him that we can do this if we just be honest and comit from both sides..he says he does but i dont feel or see it..is it me..im i somehow blinded by his actions and feelings..am i the prob here..how do i find the solution..how do i know if its me..
2007-12-09 01:44:58 · 10 answers · asked by musicslave 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sounds like you both need some counseling and, maybe sometime apart to make sure you are both ready to have a relationship. Communication is also a good way to start. Marriage is a two way street that both need to be willing to work on....
2007-12-09 01:50:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Doubting your own decisions?
If you still love him so much as you say, then why do you want to leave?
You know for sure that he is the only man you want and you will only be happy with him, but you added a condition too (if he is being honest).
You do not trust your own decisions, making you feel insecure, and when you are insecure, you start doubting yourself and your partner. Why don't you just leave the past behind and start anew, together.
2007-12-09 09:56:37 · answer #2 · answered by Hani 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, you are living my life. I feel for you.
You have kids. You love your husband. You both have made mistakes. There are problems all around and your husband is making you feel like nothing is wrong. You all don't live together and the separation isn't making things better.
Sweetie, first of all you are going to have to put yourself and your kids first. The best relationship for them is to have both parents together in a happy relationship, together. Marriage is difficult, it is somehting that take constant work from both sides and sometimes outside help is required. It is very hard to decide to leave the relationship.
You are not losing your mind. Everything you feel, is real. You are not crazy, you are not seeing imaginary things about your husband, as he would like you to believe.
I suggest that you go get divine intervention for strength for the bad relationship.
2007-12-09 10:06:51 · answer #3 · answered by heartsarebad 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What happened?! did he cheat? are you suspicious? Did you cheat? It sounds like you are distraught, but there's not much information in your question... go find someone ot talk to.... if you are obsessing about the state of your marraige it's going to intensify any problems, and in some cases push what we want most away.... sometimes it's good to give our minds a break from the things that worry us the most.... so take a step back, and try and relax, look at life, the big picture... the things you are passionate about, the things that make you feel safe and secure... slow down... but consider going and talking to a therapist at some point, it can make a world of difference.
2007-12-09 09:53:36 · answer #4 · answered by blujello 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go for counselling with him to work through the issues and learn to trust and communicate.
2007-12-09 09:54:46 · answer #5 · answered by Bears Mom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you don't know. if you have already made the decision and you know it is the right choice for you and your kids than leave. there is no easy way to say it. just pack up and go....don't wait. the longer you wait the more you will start to do what you are doing right now. second guessing your decision.
2007-12-09 09:51:22 · answer #6 · answered by Babe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What happened?If he is cheating ,then he needs to eat dirt until he EARNS the trust back he destroyed.Thats for ANYONE.
If he isnt willing to do so, let him go you cannot MAKE him be what he doesnt want to be.
2007-12-09 10:54:24 · answer #7 · answered by Joe F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not the problem, this relationship envolves you two. Just be your lovely self and he will open to you and you can ask questions in peace time.
2007-12-09 10:03:38 · answer #8 · answered by iknowthatfeeling 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he doesn't want to do this, it won't work. It takes two so it's not just you.
2007-12-09 09:50:40 · answer #9 · answered by GJax 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
iono
2007-12-09 10:51:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋